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Old 03-23-2015, 05:03 PM
 
2 posts, read 979 times
Reputation: 10

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Meet this girl last year and got close. We hung out, went out (not dating) , went for dinner etc.

We had fun and can talk for ages. I stayed overnight at hers occasionally as well, so I was thinking we should make it official to which i got rejected, this felt really **** and hurtful. I ended up not talking to her, not texting, etc. Then she made it out that i was the bad person for ignoring her.

Anyway on her fb you saw pics of her with other guys and soon this year she enter a relationship on fb and started posting pics etc. i was still hurt so deactivated my fb so i couldnt see anything, i know you can hide comments but deactivating was the only way for me. She still texts me asking how am i doing etc, but i just reply minimally. Now through other friends found out she is pregnant however the guy she was seeing has now left her. I dont know why but this has hurt me even more.

how the hell do i forget about this person and stop feeling like crap? or am i just a pure loser?
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Old 03-23-2015, 05:06 PM
 
3,352 posts, read 2,253,403 times
Reputation: 2238
Quote:
Originally Posted by arnoldrimmer View Post
Meet this girl last year and got close. We hung out, went out (not dating) , went for dinner etc.

We had fun and can talk for ages. I stayed overnight at hers occasionally as well, so I was thinking we should make it official to which i got rejected, this felt really **** and hurtful. I ended up not talking to her, not texting, etc. Then she made it out that i was the bad person for ignoring her.

Anyway on her fb you saw pics of her with other guys and soon this year she enter a relationship on fb and started posting pics etc. i was still hurt so deactivated my fb so i couldnt see anything, i know you can hide comments but deactivating was the only way for me. She still texts me asking how am i doing etc, but i just reply minimally. Now through other friends found out she is pregnant however the guy she was seeing has now left her. I dont know why but this has hurt me even more.

how the hell do i forget about this person and stop feeling like crap? or am i just a pure loser?
She is not the girl for you.
You get out there and date other girls.
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Old 03-23-2015, 06:24 PM
 
511 posts, read 311,213 times
Reputation: 401
It may take longer to get over this girl. You can do the complete no contact thing with her(no texting, no social media, etc). You can focus on some of your hobbies or your career to help your mind focus on something else.
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Old 03-23-2015, 07:08 PM
 
1,178 posts, read 956,772 times
Reputation: 2209
Just because you still care for someone does not make you a loser. I think you did great by trying to move on. It would be hard for me for someone to break up with me, see someone else, then contact me after that someone else did the same thing to them. I would feel like I was just being used to "be there" for them in their time of need, when they made it clear they didn't need me in the past when I needed them. I would also be afraid that if I let them into my life again, the same thing would happen and my heart would get broken a second time.
Good luck to you.
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Old 03-23-2015, 08:48 PM
 
Location: between Mars and Venus
1,526 posts, read 841,798 times
Reputation: 2027
She rejected you and is pregnant by some other guy. Get the hell over her already.
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Old 03-25-2015, 03:18 PM
 
Location: NYC
2,801 posts, read 3,025,354 times
Reputation: 4789
Quote:
Originally Posted by arnoldrimmer View Post
i was still hurt so deactivated my fb so i couldnt see anything, i know you can hide comments but deactivating was the only way for me. She still texts me asking how am i doing etc, but i just reply minimally. Now through other friends found out she is pregnant however the guy she was seeing has now left her. I dont know why but this has hurt me even more.
You had the right idea of no contact but why did you still allow her to text you without shutting her down? You have to quit her like a drug and any contact or news about her is just setting you back.
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Old 03-25-2015, 04:31 PM
 
32,283 posts, read 26,131,295 times
Reputation: 18927
Quote:
Originally Posted by arnoldrimmer View Post
Meet this girl last year and got close. We hung out, went out (not dating) , went for dinner etc.

We had fun and can talk for ages. I stayed overnight at hers occasionally as well, so I was thinking we should make it official to which i got rejected, this felt really **** and hurtful. I ended up not talking to her, not texting, etc. Then she made it out that i was the bad person for ignoring her.

Anyway on her fb you saw pics of her with other guys and soon this year she enter a relationship on fb and started posting pics etc. i was still hurt so deactivated my fb so i couldnt see anything, i know you can hide comments but deactivating was the only way for me. She still texts me asking how am i doing etc, but i just reply minimally. Now through other friends found out she is pregnant however the guy she was seeing has now left her. I dont know why but this has hurt me even more.

how the hell do i forget about this person and stop feeling like crap? or am i just a pure loser?
start by getting a hobby that you can throw yourself into, doesnt matter what that hobby is either.

but in the end you have to realize that she didnt feel the same thing for you that you did for her. it happens, its no big deal.

you also have to realize that every relationship is temporary in nature, and they have been since time immemorial. people will move into and out of your life regularly. some will touch your life profoundly, others will have the briefest of effect. you have to learn to let people go and move onto the next relationship that is right around the corner.

one of the best relationships i ever had was with a lady from jamaica. i wrapped my world around her for nine months, and we had a wonderful time being together. but when the season ended, and she had to go back to jamaica, i had to let her go. the next lady that comes into my life will be different, but i will do the same thing, wrap my life around her until such time as she is ready to leave the relationship. i will then unwrap myself and move on.

but i will always carry around great memories about each lady i go with.
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Old 03-25-2015, 05:15 PM
 
Location: a primitive state
9,840 posts, read 20,086,063 times
Reputation: 12286
These kinds of things really do hurt! It feels awful to be rejected.

But even though you feel bad, you just have to take everyone's word that you are not a loser. You were just not the man she was looking for.

It will take some time and effort to start feeling better. Sometimes it takes nearly a year, if you don't do anything. Little by little you'll think about it less and more interesting people and events will come into your life. Just be patient.

Do nice things for yourself. Get exercise. Spend time with friends. Start a new project. Distract yourself. You'll get there.
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Old 03-25-2015, 08:39 PM
 
12,544 posts, read 12,460,613 times
Reputation: 28900
Quote:
Originally Posted by arnoldrimmer View Post
Meet this girl last year and got close. We hung out, went out (not dating) , went for dinner etc.

We had fun and can talk for ages. I stayed overnight at hers occasionally as well, so I was thinking we should make it official to which i got rejected, this felt really **** and hurtful. I ended up not talking to her, not texting, etc. Then she made it out that i was the bad person for ignoring her.

Anyway on her fb you saw pics of her with other guys and soon this year she enter a relationship on fb and started posting pics etc. i was still hurt so deactivated my fb so i couldnt see anything, i know you can hide comments but deactivating was the only way for me. She still texts me asking how am i doing etc, but i just reply minimally. Now through other friends found out she is pregnant however the guy she was seeing has now left her. I dont know why but this has hurt me even more.

how the hell do i forget about this person and stop feeling like crap? or am i just a pure loser?
Why on earth would you deactivate your entire account, with all of your other friends and family on it, just to avoid looking at her stuff? I would have booted her from my friends list and blocked her entirely. If you couldn't bring yourself to do that, you could have at least put her on your restricted list. Then you wouldn't see anything from her, nor she you, but you would still be friends and could send messages to each other.

The only time I would deactivate an account is if I had been married or in a relationship that lasted several years and he had put all kinds of stuff on my page, and I on his. But for someone I wanted to date who didn't reciprocate? Buh-bye!
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Old 03-25-2015, 08:41 PM
 
3,947 posts, read 4,110,923 times
Reputation: 4711
Quote:
Originally Posted by arnoldrimmer View Post
Meet this girl last year and got close. We hung out, went out (not dating) , went for dinner etc.

We had fun and can talk for ages. I stayed overnight at hers occasionally as well, so I was thinking we should make it official to which i got rejected, this felt really **** and hurtful. I ended up not talking to her, not texting, etc. Then she made it out that i was the bad person for ignoring her.

Anyway on her fb you saw pics of her with other guys and soon this year she enter a relationship on fb and started posting pics etc. i was still hurt so deactivated my fb so i couldnt see anything, i know you can hide comments but deactivating was the only way for me. She still texts me asking how am i doing etc, but i just reply minimally. Now through other friends found out she is pregnant however the guy she was seeing has now left her. I dont know why but this has hurt me even more.

how the hell do i forget about this person and stop feeling like crap? or am i just a pure loser?
Get off FB and start living your life.

Chances are, she's not even the girl you thought she was. You choose to create your own reality, but sometimes when you hold onto a 'fantasy' of a person, you truly delude yourself from meeting people in reality who are a waay better match if only you could just let go of your own obsessions of what is fictional (plus she is preggers with another man).
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