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You have two weeks left before you never see her again. Why ask her out? Even if you do get a date, she'll be gone before you get very far. What exactly is your endgame here?
The best advice: Don't do this. It won't end well.
But I don't think you're going to take that advice. Maybe you're right. She can change her mind. I've never ever seen that happen but hey, it's a free country. Second best advice: I see a lot of "I"s in your post. What about her? How does she feel? What is she looking for? Are you it? We can't tell you that. And you can't magically derive that. You're going to have to talk to her. So do that. While you're doing that, if you feel you have what she wants then ask her out. If not, then let it go.
You have two weeks left before you never see her again. Why ask her out? Even if you do get a date, she'll be gone before you get very far. What exactly is your endgame here?
The best advice: Don't do this. It won't end well.
But I don't think you're going to take that advice. Maybe you're right. She can change her mind. I've never ever seen that happen but hey, it's a free country. Second best advice: I see a lot of "I"s in your post. What about her? How does she feel? What is she looking for? Are you it? We can't tell you that. And you can't magically derive that. You're going to have to talk to her. So do that. While you're doing that, if you feel you have what she wants then ask her out. If not, then let it go.
If we start a relationship, we could keep in contact
I'm not sure how she feels
but I have what she wants, it's just because I screwed up
It's not like I have anything left to loose is it ?
but at least I won't be filled with regret, at least I will have tried something
Ok. Then make amends to her for whatever your part was in the falling out with her friends. That's not an apology. It's a sincere recounting of what you and only you did to create that situation. I realize you're probably not completely to blame, but you need to be accountable for your part of it without blaming anyone else for your part. Follow that up with a sincere plan of how you'll make things as right as you can with her friends and explain how you can avoid such a scenario from happening in the future. Give her some time to process that while you go about making things right with her friends and then ask her out. At that point, you'll have presented her with the best "you" that you can possibly be. If she's still not interested, then you can walk away with no regrets. There was nothing more you could have done.
Ok. Then make amends to her for whatever your part was in the falling out with her friends. That's not an apology. It's a sincere recounting of what you and only you did to create that situation. I realize you're probably not completely to blame, but you need to be accountable for your part of it without blaming anyone else for your part. Follow that up with a sincere plan of how you'll make things as right as you can with her friends and explain how you can avoid such a scenario from happening in the future. Give her some time to process that while you go about making things right with her friends and then ask her out. At that point, you'll have presented her with the best "you" that you can possibly be. If she's still not interested, then you can walk away with no regrets. There was nothing more you could have done.
you have no idea how much I care about her and how much pain this is caused me
The situation with her has not 'caused' the pain you are experiencing.
In cases like this, the pain was already present and within you, but buried deep inside by you because it was too hard to deal with. Your 'love' for her combined with her lack of interest and/or love for you has caused the pre-existing pain that you had buried to resurface.
Even if she did reciprocate the feelings that you have for her, it would only be a band aid on a very large wound that was already there before you met her. Attempting to alleviate the existing pain that you wouldn't let surface by someone convincing yourself that if she loved you, it would go away is counter productive.
This situation has given you an incredible opportunity to identify what was going on inside you related to the pain prior to meeting her, deal with it directly now that it has surfaced and come out on the other end of things stronger and closer to healing. Once again: healing from your own internal wounds that basically have nothing to do with her, and with an understanding that even if she 'loved' you, it would not solve the core foundational problem of the pain from previous emotional hurt still existing, being buried and then resurfacing.
Look within. You are ultimately a master of your own fate and nobody else is responsible for your happiness and healing.
I'm asking you for any advice you can offer me to salvage a potential relationship
I've known this girl for over a year and I truly love her, and I know that no matter what I say you won't believe it's actually love, but it is. There hasn't been a day where I haven't stopped thinking about her in months, I do love her
But it's an unreturned love
I confessed to her a couple of months back and sure enough she have me a chance, but I screwed up, I was always bad at first impressions, always nervous and awkward for the 1st time, especially around people I have strong feelings for
After that, she started ignoring me, but we still saw each other on the weekdays at college, it was a bad situation, I ended up falling out with some of her friends and that didn't end well either, I had a confrontation with her new boyfriend iswell, who broke up with her
I only have a couple of weeks left until I never see her again,
we don't even speak anymore
is there anything I can do ?
any way to change her mind about me ?
I truly do love her
No and I wonder how you think you love this girl when you barely know her and she avoids you like the plague?
Leave her alone, move on with your life and she will be a distant memory soon.
No and I wonder how you think you love this girl when you barely know her and she avoids you like the plague?
Leave her alone, move on with your life and she will be a distant memory soon.
what utter bullsh*t
I've known her for more than a year
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