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What do you guys think about this? Is it a good idea to keep the finances separate? Both have separate accounts for everything but both contribute to a emergency savings?
I think, in my experience, it depends on the couple, and each of their banking and record keeping habits.
If one has a tendency not to write downn debit card spendings, ot just uses the card to get money out here and there without telling the other... separate.
If that is not an issue.. you choose....'
Possibly an account for each of you, as well as a bills only acct..
Good luck w it. My never to soon2bx did that all the time... I had the check book, he had the card, and when it was time for me to pay bills, the checks bounced off the ceiling and back.
Maybe he's one of those thinkers? I used to do some of that a few years ago.
Regarding the initial question though, I can't imagine not sharing my finances with my spouse (... where art thou?). I spose I can't elaborate since I have no experience in either possibilities but I just kind of figured that I'd marry someone who I trusted my money with. As in she wouldn't blow her money on shoes and my money on clothes. Ba bum tch.
I have seen both methods.
Separate accounts method scenario:
husband makes $30k, has $40k in debt
wife makes more $50k, has $20k in debt
As a couple, paying these things separately, they will never get ahead because it is not balanced. He will always be strapped and usually will only pay the minimums. She will have extra $ that she will "lend" him and resent him for it. You'd be acting like roommates rather than partners in marriage.
Pooling accounts scenario:
Together make $80k, have $60K debts
Make a plan to pay all necessities and pay debt off. Contribute to your "goal" fund (like buying a house, having 4 months emergency, buying a harley, I don't know). After that what is left over is for entertainment. There is no quibbling over who paid what, or more of what, whatever.
It depends on the couple, if one person is good with money and the other is not you better keep things seperate or you'll have nothing but trouble, if both are repsonceable with money a joint account is fine.
A good example is myself, I'm good with money and i can save, my wife lives payday to payday and pays bills late and such. Our accounts are seperate and I pay the bills because I am responceable, if not for me we would have never owned a house, never had a savings account and would be buried in debt.
Many marraiges end due to money problems and it's best to get that all figured out before hand to avoid the problems it causes.
It depends on the couple and the financial situation. I think it is a great idea for working couples. My wife and I had separate accounts for years. It was simple though as we were both working and made close to the same. We split the bills that were common (rents, mortgage, utilities, etc..) and paid our own bills separately (department store cards, etc..). We had very little debt. It was great because you still felt a certain amount of privacy, no more “honey what is this $200 withdrawal to the Classy Lady Dance Club?” or “Babe, why do you need another expensive pair of shoes you don’t need?”.
Of course kids came into the picture and work changed so accounts got combined. But I think in the beginning of a serious relationship, don’t make it an issue and keep separate accounts. Just my 2 cents. I’d give you 3 but I don’t want the wife to know about the extra money. She’d just take it.
I think it makes good sense to keep finances separate because in the past I did not and took a huge financial hit during the divorce. Money is power, money is independence, my credit record is important, and I don't want to be responsible for someone else's potentially poor spending habits or debt down the road.
It is not about how much we "love" or "trust" each other. But that's me at age 49, at age 22 it was a whole different song LOL. Raising my kids I told them it is prudent to manage their own finances, income, and expenses, not leave it in someone else's hands, just good life skill to have. I also am a firm believer in the people who make more carrying more of the expenses rather than 50-50, but the money conversation is a really important one to have whenever people get serious and are sharing expenses in any way especially if living together
My wife and I have our own checking accounts which are linked together and a joint savings acct.
I pay all of the bills out of my acct. Her account is just a slush fund to keep her happy. The savings account is basically a bail out fund in the event that we overspend.
We both contribute to the savings account.
What I keep in my account is only typically what I need to pay for bills plus a few hundred per month.
What she keeps in her account is usually equivalent to the few hundred that I have in mine.
We've got a good system but it doesn't stop her from whining when she looks at how much money I usually have in my acct. She just doesn't see the ebb and flow of money in-money out with respect to paying bills.
My first husband had a Master's Degree in finance. I would hand over my check to him and let him take care of all of the finances. Ten years later, when we divorced, I learned that all we had to split was the debt. Just because someone is smart and educated it doesn't mean they are any good at handling money.
Fast-forward twenty years... he is still in debt, I can retire if I choose to (and, NO, he wasn't paying alimony!) He's a spender, I'm a saver.
I recently remarried and we keep mostly separate accounts. Whatever we came into the marriage with we have kept separate, and money earned together goes into a joint account.
The long and the short of it is... if you are young and getting married and there are no children from previous marriages I believe you need to join your finances and assume that you will be staying together for better or worse, but both of you need to know at all times what is going on with the money or you may have an unpleasant surprise when you decide to retire decades from now and that is when you learn that your spouse stinks at handling money.
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