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This came up in another post, what's your experience, input, perspective on dating at age 50 and on up? On the one hand I'm just fine being single, but on the other hand it'd be nice to be with someone in a long-term relationship. When I try to force it to happen it blows up in my face LOL but if I just wait for it to happen does that mean I'll stay single? At what point do you resign yourself or accept that you'll stay single? Thanks! I always get so much out of what people share, everyone.
A great question. I'm not over 50 - but close enough at 45. I've only become open to being in a committed relationship over the last couple of years. I have someone I care about a great deal, but believe he'll never be interested in what I think a committed relationship is. I've also always believed in fate - you know, that God's plan will find you if it's to happen. I've been very happy being single for so many years though - I wonder if that's truly God's plan for me.
I guess I just don't know what the answer is to your question.
I went through a hideous divorce in 2003. Just awful. I have 2 children, one commuting to college from home and another in HS. There were many $$ issues to sort out, still doing so, and I need to find a job, but have been out of the workforce for quite some time.
THAT SAID: My friends tell me I'm hermit'ing, but really, I've been so busy, moving 3 times since 2003, dealing with school and logistical issues, etc. I'm 57 and I'm attractive, etc.....but I do no dating scene whatsoever, and sometimes I do feel it'd be nice to have someone MALE in my life...friend, companion more, whatever, but I my friends tell me I "don't put myself out there" (whatever that means).
I did have ONE date, but it was too early, maybe? No, I had two. Both were clones of my ex,which might have appealed to me at one time, but no more. One was arranged by a friend. It wasn't horrible, but it was just....fizzle. Not ready?
I see women my age "dating"...do they have kids? I have no idea, I'll be ho nest with you, how to proceed. I haven't dated for (leave blank!) ...well, since before I was married (Jurassic Age).
I hear you re "God's plan", which is "comforting" (?) I guess.
I'm not exactly complaining, but it does get lonely out here and I was always a "guy person", got along with and worked with them, until the divorce, which I guess got me skittish.
I haven't a clue what I'm asking here, but I wanted to connect. Everyone seems to be hooked up, married, or I sense major baggage. One friend tells me I have an "invisible moat" around me which keeps men away.....I'm attractive, sort of a Barbie looking type, so what gives? Go to the supermarket on Saturday night? I know....take flying lessons, right?
It's good to connect, anyway. I was thinking a job might help. It's odd when you divorce, how the social thing drops away except for the girlfriends (whom I treasure). All my girlfiends are married, parents, etc.
The few single ones I know are childless and living a totally different lifestye.
Maybe the job thing will lead to something. I've been married twice (but for my entire life until 2003); I met both my husbands at work (office mates, beware!)
Happy to read postings on this issue and contribute if I can. Hang in.....
I went through a hideous divorce in 2003. Just awful. I have 2 children, one commuting to college from home and another in HS. There were many $$ issues to sort out, still doing so, and I need to find a job, but have been out of the workforce for quite some time.
THAT SAID: My friends tell me I'm hermit'ing, but really, I've been so busy, moving 3 times since 2003, dealing with school and logistical issues, etc. I'm 57 and I'm attractive, etc.....but I do no dating scene whatsoever, and sometimes I do feel it'd be nice to have someone MALE in my life...friend, companion more, whatever, but I my friends tell me I "don't put myself out there" (whatever that means).
I did have ONE date, but it was too early, maybe? No, I had two. Both were clones of my ex,which might have appealed to me at one time, but no more. One was arranged by a friend. It wasn't horrible, but it was just....fizzle. Not ready?
I see women my age "dating"...do they have kids? I have no idea, I'll be ho nest with you, how to proceed. I haven't dated for (leave blank!) ...well, since before I was married (Jurassic Age).
I hear you re "God's plan", which is "comforting" (?) I guess.
I'm not exactly complaining, but it does get lonely out here and I was always a "guy person", got along with and worked with them, until the divorce, which I guess got me skittish.
I haven't a clue what I'm asking here, but I wanted to connect. Everyone seems to be hooked up, married, or I sense major baggage. One friend tells me I have an "invisible moat" around me which keeps men away.....I'm attractive, sort of a Barbie looking type, so what gives? Go to the supermarket on Saturday night? I know....take flying lessons, right?
It's good to connect, anyway. I was thinking a job might help. It's odd when you divorce, how the social thing drops away except for the girlfriends (whom I treasure). All my girlfiends are married, parents, etc.
The few single ones I know are childless and living a totally different lifestye.
Maybe the job thing will lead to something. I've been married twice (but for my entire life until 2003); I met both my husbands at work (office mates, beware!)
Happy to read postings on this issue and contribute if I can. Hang in.....
You gotta get out to a ballroom dance! Seriously, you meet the best, nicest people, you learn a fun social skill and you get great exercise all rolled into one package! Check the USA Dance (formerly USABDA) website for your area and find out where the dances and lessons are. You will not only meet some nice men who will respect you, but you will meet some new women friends too and you won't have to go out by yourself.
You gotta get out to a ballroom dance! Seriously, you meet the best, nicest people, you learn a fun social skill and you get great exercise all rolled into one package! Check the USA Dance (formerly USABDA) website for your area and find out where the dances and lessons are. You will not only meet some nice men who will respect you, but you will meet some new women friends too and you won't have to go out by yourself.
What a great idea! I'm going to check this out for sure.....there has to be one around; I live in a city.....
nothin wrong with going out dancing good social skills.
but past that--- well
appreciate you and i live in a world very different from the one we were born in
illustration
the usual question i get asked a lot - hey "hey i see this guy and he is cute but how do i know if he is married or single i mean ring, way he dresses or something?
response
we got rid of all that in the late 60's remember?
we threw a lot of stuff out that was cultural tradition.
some of it was bad but some of it was good. that is why we have so much confusion.
not everybody dislikes confusion.
people will put up a sign, for sale by owner on house or car, dont really intend to sell, i mean if you offer me 9 million, ok.
put on ankle chains and slit skirt, yank that neck line way way down
got 4 kids and a man at the house, a little extra attention does not hurt a girls ego.
how bout the internet gal that has had 450 star buck dates? and everyone of them honestly met the written criteria. i mean if he is worth 18000 million and looks like antonio banderas why not? we will cross that bridge when we come to it.
saw the sign at the electronics shop we will beat any price?
try to do it, i mean if it was purchased same day same exact model at same time bla bla bla bla
just try to get them to honor it, just try
anyway that is just a heads up.
nothin wrong with going out dancing good social skills.
but past that--- well
appreciate you and i live in a world very different from the one we were born in
illustration
the usual question i get asked a lot - hey "hey i see this guy and he is cute but how do i know if he is married or single i mean ring, way he dresses or something?
response
we got rid of all that in the late 60's remember?
we threw a lot of stuff out that was cultural tradition.
some of it was bad but some of it was good. that is why we have so much confusion.
not everybody dislikes confusion.
people will put up a sign, for sale by owner on house or car, dont really intend to sell, i mean if you offer me 9 million, ok.
put on ankle chains and slit skirt, yank that neck line way way down
got 4 kids and a man at the house, a little extra attention does not hurt a girls ego.
how bout the internet gal that has had 450 star buck dates? and everyone of them honestly met the written criteria. i mean if he is worth 18000 million and looks like antonio banderas why not? we will cross that bridge when we come to it.
saw the sign at the electronics shop we will beat any price?
try to do it, i mean if it was purchased same day same exact model at same time bla bla bla bla
just try to get them to honor it, just try
anyway that is just a heads up.
saw the sign at the electronics shop we will beat any price?
try to do it, i mean if it was purchased same day same exact model at same time bla bla bla bla
just try to get them to honor it, just try
anyway that is just a heads up.
It's still an illustration ..... he may not turn out just as clear as the picture he painted.
Well, the woman I'm now engaged to was over 50 when I met her. I am a few years younger than she is. Our first meeting was at a public meeting, of all places. And, that particular night, I was busy, and in a hurry also. Still, I somehow "knew" that she was the one for me. I agree with another poster who said something about God having a plan for us all. I think you will just need to go to places where sober, responciable, people might be located. There is someone thats right for everyone, I believe. It will probably happen when you aren't looking, and aren't expecting to meet anyone. That is how it was for me, for sure! And just so you know, a whole bunch of you women 50 and over, are still very attractive, (and sexy). I predict you WILL meet the right man for you!
This came up in another post, what's your experience, input, perspective on dating at age 50 and on up? On the one hand I'm just fine being single, but on the other hand it'd be nice to be with someone in a long-term relationship. When I try to force it to happen it blows up in my face LOL but if I just wait for it to happen does that mean I'll stay single? At what point do you resign yourself or accept that you'll stay single? Thanks! I always get so much out of what people share, everyone.
I've been single for approx. 12 years now and I'm lovin it. The longer I'm single the more I enjoy the peace and quiet Dennis. In the beginning I tried dating, and the first man I dated was such a lier and he wouldn't allow me to break up with him. It actually took me 3 years to get him to leave me alone and a police visit to his home and I still get calls now and then from him...
The second guy, well, to put it mildly, we were not compatible....buy ohhh my, did I fall for him..that one hurt bad...but it wasn't meant to be, I know that now. And I think at the time I was quit needy but feared a relationship....certainly put him through one heck of a roller coaster ride...sorry bout that to.
there after, I started trying to date again, and I met mostly needy men that would have married anything that walked down the street, just to be taken care of.
I met one nice man, really nice guy with a problematic 25 year old daughter on antidepressents and other drugs, living with him and after dealing with my DIL, didn't want that in my life again.
I also met men who were pretty fast moving....one, I had to kick to get off me...
Another, all he did was talk about his money, he was rich, yes, but had nothing else going for him....and never once, did he ask me anything about me.
I remember meeting a very nice college professor in the very beginning, and I wish I had dated him...but, I was so new out of a very bad marriage and ending, that I wasn't really ready to date...plus, after the first two, I think, I had had enough.
I believe there are really great men out there, but I wasn't fortunate enough to meet them.
I did date some men that were fun....but they wanted to get serious right away, and I didn't want that...I just wanted to see if we could be friends....and one man....LOL, bought me his portfolio....all his jobs, accomplishments, etc. ??????? Another, all he did was discuss his deceased wife, and I knew there was no living up to that one....
Strange world, but as Henry used to say.....VERY INTERESTING!!!!! LOL
I've come to a point in my life, where I'm very happy, not a lot of problems...certainly not well to do, but I get by and have a lot of fun. My friends still don't get it though and sometimes still try to fix me up with someone....I don't want a partner/companion anylonger....I put my time in, had a few bad marriages....I'm no longer good with relationships...do not have the patience for it, and fear, due to bad marriages, that maybe I've got a lot of baggage. I would rather hurt then hurt someone, therefore, I choose to be NOT in a relationship.
In watching the movie, "Must love dogs" I get such a kick out of it, cuz it reminds me of my experiences....some really great, some, not so great....
Last edited by cremebrulee; 01-17-2008 at 07:20 AM..
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Another, all he did was discuss his deceased wife, and I knew there was no living up to that one....
