if she/he says he has genital herpes... deal breaker? (married, husband)
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I would be concerned with outbreaks, and her history of outbreaks. I would also consider her to be a trustworthy person, for exposing herself to you. Personally, I wouldn't chance getting infected, since there are plenty of fish out there, and obviously, you haven't invested anything, and neither has she. It wouldn't be a shock for her to hear someone decline a sexual relationship because of HSV2, not saying it won't hurt, and it's not fair, just saying she has probably heard it before.
I met someone a couple years ago on OKC, went out on 3 dates, kissed her with tongue on the 3rd date, felt her up at the end of the night, she pulled away and told me "not yet"... and we left it at that.
I went home, later that night, I got a text from her explaining that she had genital herpes HSV2. She contracted it via a rape when she was 19 and had been living with it since then (she was in her mid 30's). She was telling me this because she liked me, and wanted to be open about it.
I was pissed that she did not tell me this upfront and she decided to tell me that via text message. I thought that was not very open. And I was concerned because I kissed her. I never spoke to her again. I got tested and am fine.
If you had begun dating someone who said they had genital herpes from a prior relationship, would that be a deal breaker or not? and Why?
I have a friend who revealed to me that a prior lover unfortunately gave her genital herpes. She's on medicine now for outbreaks and although minimized there is still a small risk of contracting the virus during sex.
If you were in the beginning stages of a romantic relationship and your significant other revealed this, what would you do?
Leave. Hope they were smart enough to inform me before I kissed them.
If you had begun dating someone who said they had genital herpes from a prior relationship, would that be a deal breaker or not? and Why?
I have a friend who revealed to me that a prior lover unfortunately gave her genital herpes. She's on medicine now for outbreaks and although minimized there is still a small risk of contracting the virus during sex.
If you were in the beginning stages of a romantic relationship and your significant other revealed this, what would you do?
No, not a deal breaker unless you are immature and selfish. It's a medical condition. Outbreaks can be managed with medication. You refrain from contact during outbreaks and flare-ups.
It's not AIDS. It's herpes… not too different from the herpes like a cold sore on your mouth. So for the high and mighty, self-righteous, climb down off your high horse. It can happen to anyone. Might have already happened to you. You can be a carrier for years and not know it. That's right, years. Doesn't make your dirty or a bad person. It just happens. How you say? Because partners don't always tell. Sometimes they don't know they have it. Just like all STD's. It's part of life. Part of the risk when you have a relationship and sexual intercourse. It can be managed with medication and common sense. I certainly would not abandon a relationship over it. I'd be glad the person was honest.
Last edited by BamaBlue; 06-01-2015 at 04:07 PM..
Reason: add info
Based on this, I'm assuming that if the person knows they have it, they probably get outbreaks fairly often.
And yeah, sorry to say, it would be a dealbreaker. I made it to 48 without dealing with that. At this stage of my life, no relationship is worth jeopardizing my health in any way, shape, or form.
Based on this, I'm assuming that if the person knows they have it, they probably get outbreaks fairly often.
Uh… not necessarily (read on below).
And yeah, sorry to say, it would be a dealbreaker. I made it to 48 without dealing with that. At this stage of my life, no relationship is worth jeopardizing my health in any way, shape, or form.
You might try READING the article, not just pasting it. This is a paragraph from the article you linked:
Quote:
Genital herpes is one of the most stigmatized of STI's, and it's far more common than most people think. But learning that you have it might just cause you more social harm than actual good. It's something that experts love to debate. Here are four facts you probably didn't want to know about herpes.
Most people infected with herpes don't ever have symptoms. And most routine STI testing doesn't look for herpes, either. What? Yes. So that's why most people don't know that they have it.
Last edited by BamaBlue; 06-01-2015 at 04:30 PM..
Reason: add info
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