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I've never been married; but as a single guy, I disagree - I think romance (and love) does exist. I think viewing it as who has the 'upper hand' is a very shallow way of looking at it (and if one is analyzing their own relationship in this way, then it's probably likely it isn't love).
Real romance exists when each person puts the other person first - and each does things to keep the love alive. It may not be as 'exciting' as the passion or chemistry between two people early on, but it certainly is more rewarding in the long-term.
Always shown that I am an option. A fun time passin by for them, but the possibility of them curving you for whatever reason is entierley possible. It doesnt really matter how much they seem to like you or how much they make you think somethings there, it can end at any moment,
I've never been married; but as a single guy, I disagree - I think romance (and love) does exist. I think viewing it as who has the 'upper hand' is a very shallow way of looking at it (and if one is analyzing their own relationship in this way, then it's probably likely it isn't love).
Real romance exists when each person puts the other person first - and each does things to keep the love alive. It may not be as 'exciting' as the passion or chemistry between two people early on, but it certainly is more rewarding in the long-term.
That's a real sweet way to to think.Tinkerbell ran out of fairy dust for some.
I went through a long series of unfulfilling relationships on my way to meeting my husband. Sometimes they dumped me, sometimes I dumped them. It happens to both sexes.
Think of it as looking for the perfect piece of fruit. You search and discard the ones that aren't just right for you. Some are not ripe, some are just okay, some are rotten, some may even be just right but someone else gets there first. Then you find the right one. It takes awhile.
Relationships are complicated, and there may be nothing wrong with you and you can still end up alone.
I was casually dating a nice man before I met my husband. Once I met my husband, I Broke it off right away. He was great. There was nothing wrong with him...I had just met the person that was right for me.
and that's why i don't believe in casual dating. I date one at a time, and make it clear u expect the same. if it don't work out then cool but at least it won't be over because another steps in unless the girl is a cheater.
This thread is making me feel seriously old. You young 'uns spend way too much time over-thinking relationships and the power dynamic between men and women. If you'd just lighten the heck up, you might find that dating is enjoyable, and maybe, just maybe, you'll find someone along the way who makes your heart sing.
Take it from a long married woman in a great marriage, stop this nonsense. Most people find just one person to whom they can really make a commitment. The truly fortunate ones like my grandmother, who was left a young widow, get two. You all seem to think love is war, which will tear a relationship apart before it even has a chance. I have no idea how you got that way, but it makes me very sad.
I have to agree 100% with this. I don't necessarily think it's just young people here, but there is a whole subset of people (a lot who post in this forum) who see love and romance as some kind of game (they even call it "game") with winners and losers. To them it's all a power struggle and people have "value" you can defeat... like Pokemon cards. And in the end, most of them come across as angry and bitter. They do it to themselves. Having a special person in your life is a wonderful thing. You give as much as you can to that person and, in return, they give as much as they can. If you are looking to take what you can, it's never going to work.
Anyway, I am not sure if I count as truly single because I am in a committed relationship, but I believe in love and romance. I think this poster said exactly what I would have.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CorporateCowboy
I've never been married; but as a single guy, I disagree - I think romance (and love) does exist. I think viewing it as who has the 'upper hand' is a very shallow way of looking at it (and if one is analyzing their own relationship in this way, then it's probably likely it isn't love).
Real romance exists when each person puts the other person first - and each does things to keep the love alive. It may not be as 'exciting' as the passion or chemistry between two people early on, but it certainly is more rewarding in the long-term.
Romance is real,it fluctuates and changes,people's emotions are volatile if you want things to be static then buy a robot lover! Yes girls will throw you out like yesterday's news but there are plenty of very loyal and loving women,you're sure to find one.
I have to agree 100% with this. I don't necessarily think it's just young people here, but there is a whole subset of people (a lot who post in this forum) who see love and romance as some kind of game (they even call it "game") with winners and losers. To them it's all a power struggle and people have "value" you can defeat... like Pokemon cards. And in the end, most of them come across as angry and bitter. They do it to themselves. Having a special person in your life is a wonderful thing. You give as much as you can to that person and, in return, they give as much as they can. If you are looking to take what you can, it's never going to work.
Anyway, I am not sure if I count as truly single because I am in a committed relationship, but I believe in love and romance. I think this poster said exactly what I would have.
Problem is that some people aren't willing to let themselves be vulnerable, because of the risk of getting hurt. It's easier and safer to keep their guard up and tell themselves it's game.
Love doesn't need pixie dust - it requires common sense, maturity, passion, and selflessness.
And money.To attract women now a days. Thats the core you speak of. The more you have, the more of your faults she will overlook. I mean that in a nice way.
Romance is the process of turning infatuation into love.
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