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For one of my best friends and her husband, their affectionate pet name for each other is "dork." I know it's him calling when she answers the phone, "What's up, dorkus?"
I call him Booger, Dork, and Idiot - among other things. He calls me Clown, Nerd, Woman - among other things. I don't think he cares if I call him stupid now - but he was just sensitive about it in the beginning. A big part of our relationship is teasing each other - and it always has been - so I was sort of taken aback when he told me I couldn't call him stupid. I didn't understand it but I still respected it. I think now that he's completely sure of how I see him - I could basically call him anything and it wouldn't matter.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Auraliea
You did get a tad bit sensitive over the matter...but as for the manly thing--that's not what it's about.
I'm often called goofy, weird, and silly by everyone. I don't mind it at all. I actually take it as a compliment because I want people to feel comfortable with me. I want the atmosphere to be refreshing, not oppressive.
I think the issue is that we can be insensitive to things that aren't a big deal to us. You might take it as a compliment that someone calls you those things - and that's fine - but someone else might be upset by it. Often, it's something that we are insecure about. And it might be something that nobody would guess.
Yeah you need to loosen up. Those names clock in at about a 1.2 on the Insult-o-meter. Nobody likes someone who can't take a joke. She'll respect you more if you're secure enough to laugh at yourself than if you're defensive about even the mildest insult. Just be like, "hey, birds of a feather, baby..." and keep walking.
The last time a woman called me jackass and stupid was in bed with me at the time with a smile on her face. Just saying. I agree that you shouldn't worry about what random women like and dislike and worry about the one you're with, but it's pretty universal that women like a man with a sense of humor.
I think the issue is that we can be insensitive to things that aren't a big deal to us. You might take it as a compliment that someone calls you those things - and that's fine - but someone else might be upset by it. Often, it's something that we are insecure about. And it might be something that nobody would guess.
Agreed. My mother would tease me about something, and I got offended .She possibly felt bad, and commented it was just teasing and no real put down. But it was something I was sensitive about, so I didn't want to hear a joke about it.
So yeah. Usually even light teasing can strike a nerve when it's something you already don't feel good about. So when the teasing happens, it only shows others are thinking it too, and that what you see as a flaw about yourself is only completely obvious to anyone who looks at, or hangs out with, you.
Last edited by HappyRain; 06-19-2015 at 03:07 PM..
I think the issue is that we can be insensitive to things that aren't a big deal to us. You might take it as a compliment that someone calls you those things - and that's fine - but someone else might be upset by it. Often, it's something that we are insecure about. And it might be something that nobody would guess.
Yeah that is true.
I wasn't really thinking about that when I typed my last response. Come to think of it...I would hate when someone called me tall or skinny. I was really insecure about my height and weight for a while, I still do get a LITTLE offended if someone keeps talking about it. So yes I agree with you.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jayhurd
This morning me and my girlfriend were talking about how i usually don't use a wallet and she said..you are so weird.
We continued talking about other stuff and she said you are so goofy and laughed.
I replied please don't call me weird or goofy,i don't like that. She said don't be so sensitive. I'm just teasing you. That's how i am. You should know this by now.
I just don't like being called goofy or weird because it makes me think the girl sees me as a friend or is starting to lose interest in me
Should i just forget about it and shrug it off.
I'm not a sensitive type . i just didn't like it
I think you did nothing wrong. If someone calls me something I don't like, I nip that in the bud and tell that person to cut the out. If that makes me overly sensitive, I don't give a damn.
Weird and goofy makes me feel geeky.something I've been trying to change.
I've tried to be more confident and manly recent years
thats good, but be secure in yourself as you are first. that is where you confidence will start to grow.
and when someone calls you goofy, or weird, then use that to turn the tables on the person calling those things. act a bit goofy and exaggerate the goofyness. make them laugh, the harder the better.
once you are confident in who you are, and can handle the teasing, your confidence will start to grow.
soon you will get like me, and when someone lets me know that i am fat, i tell them that they have a solid grasp of the blatantly obvious, so how is their grasp of the merely obvious?
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in the bud and tell that person to cut the 
