Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
If we're talking about physical attraction, I don't see how it's possible to consciously lower one's standards. I'm either sexually attracted to a woman or I'm not. I will say that the range of women I would bang has expanded as I've gotten older, but that could be an evolutionary response to a diminishing number of options.
Women are thanking, please, stay away from us for good
I find most people don't have a problem finding a mate. It's the ones who inordinately picky that get told to lower their standards.
My friend who is barely over five foot and will only date guys over six foot. (Among other ridiculous requirements)Come on...really? She hasn't been on a date in a decade.
Another friend will only date women under age 28, although he is pushing 50. Guess how many dates he's been on since he turned 35?
It's the rigid and endless checklist approach that is obnoxious. How about meeting people and seeing if you are attracted and a good match.
I find most people don't have a problem finding a mate. It's the ones who inordinately picky that get told to lower their standards.
My friend who is barely over five foot and will only date guys over six foot. (Among other ridiculous requirements)Come on...really? She hasn't been on a date in a decade.
Another friend will only date women under age 28, although he is pushing 50. Guess how many dates he's been on since he turned 35?
It's the rigid and endless checklist approach that is obnoxious. How about meeting people and seeing if you are attracted and a good match.
I think what happens with many people who are ageist is that they never really had any long-term relationships. They may be 45, but they're as active as a 20+ year old. They never experienced the exhausting mileage you can put on from raising a child, and even more so a family. So, even though it says they're 45 on their drivers license, they look in the mirror and still believe and feel they're 20+ years old. It's a mindset and 45 year old women their age, just don't feel the same way. Let's be realistic too, most 45 year old women have had long-term relationships end and possibly even had a kid along the way. The 45 year old man has probably had casual relationships for the last 15 years and hasn't allowed himself to be vulnerable to any one woman.
Older women won't have much respect for that man, while younger women will likely continue to fall into the trap. It's like Matthew Mcconahey from Dazed and Confused. I like them high school girls, I keep getting older and they stay the same age.
If we're talking about physical attraction, I don't see how it's possible to consciously lower one's standards. I'm either sexually attracted to a woman or I'm not. I will say that the range of women I would bang has expanded as I've gotten older, but that could be an evolutionary response to a diminishing number of options.
mmm...still waters run deep
lmao...just kidding im about as deep as a puddle
attraction to a woman or man isn't always immediate
back in the day I zero'd in on a hotty, a possible mrs tonight...just to find myself liking one of her friends more...even now, at work say, a woman who ive worked in the same building with for years goes unnoticed but then I talk to her a bit, see her smile or whatever and discover she is attractive, especially the sour pusses who almost never smile
Some people do manage to lower their standards, so it isn't like what they suggest is universally impossible. Just because you can't lower your standards does not mean the advice is not appropriate for anyone else.
If a man is in the bottom 20% of the population in looks, odds are pretty good he realizes he isn't going to attract the most attractive women, and has already lowered his standards to "average" or slightly below average looking women. So when he is told that "average" women and slightly below average looking women are out of his range, it is a hard pill for him to swallow. Some such men choose to drop out of the dating game rather than date someone they are not attracted to, some make themselves more attractive, some continue to pursue women above their league in hopes they will win the love lottery.
As far as the quality of that advice, well it depends on the source and the context, often "Your too picky" and "you need to lower your standards" are code/shorthand for "you are not as attractive as you think you are, you need to increase your market value considerably, or settle for much less attractive women"
It depends on what the standards are and how important. In terms of looks, I can see loosening. I'm not talking dating someone repulsive but maybe a different type. In terms of morals once again depends. I won't loosen my morals and that never will change.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
