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...so many guys on here say things like - "I used to be a nice guy but women don't like that so now I don't care how I treat them!" And the thing is - just because most people don't like someone who is ONLY nice and ONLY agrees with them all the time - it doesn't mean that they prefer the OPPOSITE of that.
Sorry ladies - you reap what you sow...there is no payoff for being a gentleman - if anything, in the dating world it's seen as a sign of weakness which will quickly get you friend-zoned...
Sorry ladies - you reap what you sow...there is no payoff for being a gentleman - if anything, in the dating world it's seen as a sign of weakness which will quickly get you friend-zoned...
Are you serious? lol Any woman I have ever dated seriously appreciated the fact that there are indeed still some gentlemen left in the world today.
You don't know what the hell you're talking about.
It's usually code for a guy who has no outstanding characteristics other than a pleasant demeanor. My husband is nice and also handsome. I'd describe him as a good man rather than a nice guy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by GuyInSD
Sorry ladies - you reap what you sow...there is no payoff for being a gentleman - if anything, in the dating world it's seen as a sign of weakness which will quickly get you friend-zoned...
Niceness is a basic human personality requirement. Why would I spend time with someone who wasn't nice?
The issue can be that sometimes guys are boring, and looks have nothing to do with it. I knew a guy years ago, had all the "bad boy" qualities, hot and all tatted up, and the only thing he could do was talk about work, complain about work, talk about his band, complain about his band. Zzzzzzzzz.... It had nothing to do with his hotness or his bad boyness - he was boring.
Met another guy - very typically nice, clean cut, good job, cute...if the man ever had an interesting or creative thought in his head, he sure never shared it with me. Literally never had anything interesting to say. Snooze.
Nice is good. Cute is fine. But what kind of personality do you have? That matters just as much as being nice.
the bad boy/provider ratio is not adequate
He has to be a bad boy, but be willing to change/improve...he needs to be a moldable mate...
if he is a bad boy but total loser with no provider potential, or if he has excellent provider potential but is too nice...in most cases women aren't attracted to him
Sorry ladies - you reap what you sow...there is no payoff for being a gentleman - if anything, in the dating world it's seen as a sign of weakness which will quickly get you friend-zoned...
We reap what we sow? Well, then I'm okay with that since I would say that most of the guys that I dated were gentlemen!
We aren't sending signals? We are sending them left and right.....men are just confused.
You think you are but you aren't. I personally don't do signals, a woman could either tell me she's into me like a mature adult or leave me alone. The games should've ended after high school.
I think a nice guy faces the same problem as the not so nice "nice-guy";
Just about everyone has the capacity to "be nice", especially to someone they care about. So if your defining trait is something so common that the woman could barely find someone who doesn't measure up to that quality, who would that quality be interesting?
Ask yourself OP, if a girl that you previously thought nothing good or bad of approached you let you know that she in fact have managed the astonishing achievement of graduating high-school or riding a bike, how impressed would you be?
Sure there is women who have yet to perform either, but let's face the fact that most have done both, and can brag with neither.
Approaching the problem as a "job requirement" where "niceness" is your primary skill is sort of loosing the whole point. You don't have to be anything; not nice, not sober, not employed, or rich or whatever.
The only thing you have to is to give the vibe that being with you is a happy time that the other part, man or woman, wants more of, and above all for themselves. The other part has to FEEL he or she wants to be with you, NOT "logically end up with the conclusion that it's the practical thing to do"
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