Insensitive jerks on dating sites (man, younger, different, interested)
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3,259 posts, read 4,324,105 times
Reputation: 13471
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikala43
I know that has to sting...... but you asked him a question, and he gave you an honest answer.
I think politeness would dictate that he just tell you that you are not his type and leave it there, but there you go.
This x100.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ocnjgirl
I would never ask a man to validate me...you asked, and he answered. I know it's tough, but what did you expect him to do, lie?
She was hopeful evidently.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Dissenter
Ladies, don't ask for the truth if you can't handle it. Guys, if a woman asks for the truth on her looks, don't go into specifics, just say ok. Hell, lie if you have to. We can't win this one anyway.
There's no winner here for certain!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Auraliea
Why did you ask if you didn't want an honest answer?
I don't understand that logic.
Telling the truth when you ASK for it doesn't make him an insensitive jerk. You just felt bad and took it out on him. You should probably work on that.
Agreed that she has to fix her self esteem issues.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life
Sounds like a fake thread set up to prove how all the women here would let the man have it if a guy insulted a woman's weight.
Ultimately, this is the correct answer. I suspect a simple troll among us, but look how popular the thread already is. :P
To quote an old proverb:
Quote:
“If you truly want honesty, don't ask questions you don't really want the answer to”
He is an a**hole. Losing weight doesn't work in the long run. Online dating absolutely stinks because you are forced to consider things that really don't mean squat in the long run.
What do you mean "losing weight doesn't work in the long run". Does that mean you'll eventually put the weight back on? Well, who's fault is that?
By the way, I met my wife of 10 years on match.com
I don't know why people do this sort of thing, you ask an opinion and get upset by it. Granted he maybe could have been "nicer" about it. Without reading word for word what he wrote I don't know if he was overly mean or not.
Frankly you are coming off like a petulant child, at least to me.
Put on your big girl panties when you put yourself out there and ask for an opinion and be prepared to hear the negative.
I say this as a man that like women with a few extra, so I'm not trying to be one of these fat shaming type of guys that litter this forum.
i will never understand why people waste each other's time in these circumstances. the guy has been talking to op for god knows how long and is obviously not physically attracted to her, so why waste your damn time pursuing someone you're not physically attracted to? i personally would not waste either of our time if i am not physically attracted to the woman. i think it's his fault for leading op on for the duration he has and op needs to let it go and find someone who will appreciate her chubbiness. simple!
I was chatting with a guy from a dating site a while back and he seemed really nice. We hit it off almost immediately, I liked his sense of humor and we had a lot of things in common. After chatting every day for about 10 days he said that I have a really pretty face. I was very flattered by his compliment and thanked him, then I asked what he thought of the rest of me and he said honestly I'm a bit too chubby and that it's a shame as I deserve to have a better body and that he would be even more attracted to me if I did. I got upset and his reaction was to tell me that losing weight isn't that hard, and that he's done it himself. I told him that is not the way to compliment a woman, and I stopped chatting to him. He sent me a message a couple of days later saying don't take it so bad, it was just an observation, and that I did ask for his opinion. But still, that doesn't change the fact that he is very superficial and judgmental. I was very upset and I still am. Every time I look in the mirror I'm reminded of his rude comment to me. I'm sick of these insensitive jerks.
Jerks both male and female are out there on dating sites, and they are in abundance after all, it's just a screen. Some say things they won't say in person.
Be your own person, don't ask for compliments, but if you feel you need to lose a few pounds, do it for you. Make a negative situation into positive.
I was chatting with a guy from a dating site a while back and he seemed really nice. We hit it off almost immediately, I liked his sense of humor and we had a lot of things in common. After chatting every day for about 10 days he said that I have a really pretty face. I was very flattered by his compliment and thanked him, then I asked what he thought of the rest of me and he said honestly I'm a bit too chubby and that it's a shame as I deserve to have a better body and that he would be even more attracted to me if I did. I got upset and his reaction was to tell me that losing weight isn't that hard, and that he's done it himself. I told him that is not the way to compliment a woman, and I stopped chatting to him. He sent me a message a couple of days later saying don't take it so bad, it was just an observation, and that I did ask for his opinion. But still, that doesn't change the fact that he is very superficial and judgmental. I was very upset and I still am. Every time I look in the mirror I'm reminded of his rude comment to me. I'm sick of these insensitive jerks.
Hmm...dunno. Maybe he was just begin honest? Trying to help you?
You asked, he answered. If you aren't prepared for answers you might not like, don't ask what people think.
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