Friendzone is a misnomer

[cindersslipper]

ok guys please explain "the friendzone situation" to me.

I always thought it referred to the disappointment a man feels when his chosen lady gives him the "lets just be friends" talk.

What I didn't realize, until now, is apparently that disappointment is enough for the seeking guy to erase the female completely from his personal sphere of existence.

So what happens to all these wishes to be friends? Would you all rather the girl said, "dude, no matter what you do, I'm not going there with you"? Would that make you happier with the girl and more able to treat them as actual human beings and maybe hang out sometime, rather than just c*cking material?

There's a massive >>???<< when guys say they want a relationship, then when offered one (albeit not sexual), react like they've just been offered a dose of the plague!

Do y'all want a relationship, or do you just want a breathing sex toy?

[rego00123]

It's more a case of I want more than you have to offer me, so I will just focus my attention elsewhere.
I'm sure for some it is just about sex, some people are "just" about that. Their actions will follow suit as a result.

Intentions for even bothering to keep in contact with each other are just not the same, so people choose to move on in ways that do not further their attachment.

It's easy to say "let's be friends" it's another thing to follow through when feelings are actually present. You cannot control how someone makes you feel, you can only limit the exposure they have within your life to quell your own desires by disassociation.

As easy as it is for a women to fall back on the "im not a sex toy" as a counter argument for men who would wish to not be friends with those they fancy... The actual practice of not wanting to invole yourself further with someone who doesn't want the same things has little to do with sex or the sexes. It is a natural human behavior.

It's self preservation at the end of the day, it's looking out for your best interests.
Not many people are going to put "feeling unfufilled" on the short list of things they want to feel let alone involve themselves with who ever may make them feel that way by association.

[RJ312]

Originally Posted by rego00123

It's more a case of I want more than you have to offer me, so I will just focus my attention elsewhere.
I'm sure for some it is just about sex, some people are "just" about that.

Yes, I agree. Time is finite. When you are a single guy, the first priority is finding a relationship with a sexual component.

[The Dissenter]

Originally Posted by cindersslipper

ok guys please explain "the friendzone situation" to me.

I always thought it referred to the disappointment a man feels when his chosen lady gives him the "lets just be friends" talk.

What I didn't realize, until now, is apparently that disappointment is enough for the seeking guy to erase the female completely from his personal sphere of existence.

So what happens to all these wishes to be friends? Would you all rather the girl said, "dude, no matter what you do, I'm not going there with you"? Would that make you happier with the girl and more able to treat them as actual human beings and maybe hang out sometime, rather than just c*cking material?

There's a massive >>???<< when guys say they want a relationship, then when offered one (albeit not sexual), react like they've just been offered a dose of the plague!

Do y'all want a relationship, or do you just want a breathing sex toy?

What you are saying is ridiculous. I've said before in this thread I have female friends who my relationship with them started platonic and is platonic. There is a major difference in developing a platonic relationship from the ground up and accepting a platonic relationship as a consolation prize after being rejected for a romantic relationship.

Are guys supposed to feel guilty in wanting companionship and sex from a woman they've grown to like? Do guys have no right to protect their hearts by not being around that person they know they will never experience the level of intimacy they want with that woman?

News flash; you are NOT entitled to a platonic friendship with a guy. You are talking like just because you let him down gently he owes you a platonic coffee date at Starbucks. Hell no.