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Old 09-19-2015, 09:45 AM
 
264 posts, read 189,970 times
Reputation: 102

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I know I'm not innocent.
He is the one in a realtionship tho not me
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Old 09-19-2015, 09:46 AM
 
264 posts, read 189,970 times
Reputation: 102
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ms.Mathlete View Post
1. You are not a victim
2. When you choose to have sex with someone else's man, you are making it clear that you do not deserve to be treated better
Well sorry I don't agree
I do think I deserve to be treat better
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Old 09-19-2015, 09:51 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
49,932 posts, read 59,632,754 times
Reputation: 98359
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kellyanne29 View Post
I know I'm not innocent.
He is the one in a realtionship tho not me
You both cheated. That's how it works.

If you would have to lie to his GF, you cheated.
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Old 09-19-2015, 09:53 AM
 
Location: Earth
4,575 posts, read 5,165,421 times
Reputation: 7010
Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut View Post
Best believe it. Never underestimate the lengths a man will go in order to have sex.

Why in the world would you even get involved with a man whos has a child with his girlfriend ? What makes this douche canoe so awesome?
This. Some men will do and say whatever to get sex. Some men date women for months with no sex, and play the boyfriend role, then drop her later. It's to some on this very forum.

Some men pay money and fly out for a night, or few with a sex buddy.

I always bring this up, because it's a perfect example for stuff like this. So you could see how sour these things get. A lady acquaintance had this very problem. I just copied and pasted the story. Read if you'd like, if not fine. Just skip the spoiler tag and go to the rest.
Spoiler
She prides herself on her looks and intelligence, thinking she's a real catch. She met a guy, who made clear he wanted to have sex with her, even though he had a girlfriend. She knew about his girlfriend, and started having sex with him a few months after they'd been speaking. At the start, she thought she was more special than she was. He'd tell her how beautiful she was. Talk sexually to her. Say how she's a dream come true, and makes his life better. Saying how he's surprised a woman like her wants him. Then talk about how he's unhappy with his girlfriend.

Fast forward a few months, he's off-handed with her. He would ignore her messages on occasion, telling her he wasn't going to risk his relationship for her. She'd get pissed and complain and nag him about being used. He didn't care. He'd shrug it off. And she'd just have to get over it. She was unhappy, but did he care? No. But she stayed, because like you, she couldn't believe everything going on was only for sex.

At 1st, she thought he loved her too, more than his girlfriend. Did he? No. And he'd have an excuse for why he couldn't leave his girlfriend. But he put on an act at 1st, thinking it was the only way he'd get sex from her. As his treatment got more cold, she still slept with him whenever he wanted, then he saw she was a pushover and lost even more respect for her. Then his treatment got so off-handed he didn't even try to pretend he liked her anymore- once he saw how desperate and sprung she was. She finally left when she realized it was never that he didn't want another girlfriend. He just didn't want her to be that girlfriend. When his 1st girlfriend left him, he had no problem dating another girl, but it wasn't his side-chick. She very upset because she'd known him for 2 years, and he still didn't love her, and found a girl in only a few months that he'd rather date + spend time with, while still wanting to keep her as a side-chick, just to a new girlfriend now. She was finally complete disillusioned, and woke up.

So girls who get involved with other women's men, usually are the ones that end up played. The mistress will be dropped before the wife or girlfriend is. Some men have left their partners for other the women, but it usually the other woman that gets made a fool of.

And really, while the cheater is horrible and lowdown, the mistress is not any better when she decides to enable and help the man cheat on his partner. You both show that you're selfish and only care for your own wants, and will be dirty to get them.

Just like how you complain this guy disrespected you. You didn't respect his girlfriend any when you decided to help her boyfriend cheat on her. So you see how easy it is to not give a crap for someone, and do whatever you please. Why do you deserve any more respect than the girlfriend he's cheating on? What makes you any more special than her? Nothing, other than your own bias.

Last edited by HappyRain; 09-19-2015 at 10:12 AM..
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Old 09-19-2015, 09:58 AM
 
Location: U.S.A.
19,607 posts, read 20,070,900 times
Reputation: 28667
People's self-destructive nature can really get out of hand & take over in extreme situations like this... Sure, there are feelings between you two - but deep down you both know reality's looming and there's just no way you can be together now - him dealing with fatherhood & all. Escaping into fantasy together sure is tempting, isn't it... When the actions match the words, that's when you'll know it's real. So release him with Love and let it be...
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Old 09-19-2015, 10:06 AM
 
2,970 posts, read 2,757,477 times
Reputation: 3176
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kellyanne29 View Post
Well sorry I don't agree
I do think I deserve to be treat better
OP:

Both of you were disrespectful and selfish.

You want to be treated better...

Then do not be disrespectful and selfish.

Actions speak louder than words.

Present yourself in the way you want to be treated.

That means act the exact opposite of how you acted in both of your threads.
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Old 09-19-2015, 10:12 AM
 
264 posts, read 189,970 times
Reputation: 102
I knew he wouldn't leave..that wasn't what's upset me ...his dad left him when he was a baby,I knew he wouldn't,I wouldn't want that.
What hurts is how he can just cut me off after everything..it's a total head screw situation.
I can't help that I'm hurt..
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Old 09-19-2015, 10:18 AM
 
Location: Earth
4,575 posts, read 5,165,421 times
Reputation: 7010
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kellyanne29 View Post
I knew he wouldn't leave..that wasn't what's upset me ...his dad left him when he was a baby,I knew he wouldn't,I wouldn't want that.
What hurts is how he can just cut me off after everything..it's a total head screw situation.
I can't help that I'm hurt..
The same way he could lie to his girlfriend and run around on her after everything they have been through together, even having a child together. If he was that disrespectful to his girlfriend, why would you go into all this thinking you'd be special? Because I am sure some lying was going on with his girlfriend when he's supposedly unhappy and not telling her, on top of sleeping around with other women.

This is a flaw many women make. They know a man is a cheater - and they're helping him, yet think they can fully trust him when the whole reason they're with him, in the 1st place, is because he's not trustworthy. His girlfriend / wife couldn't trust him.
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Old 09-19-2015, 10:22 AM
 
264 posts, read 189,970 times
Reputation: 102
I think I switched off from the situation...got too into the moment and didn't care for the consequences
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Old 09-19-2015, 10:28 AM
 
Location: Earth
4,575 posts, read 5,165,421 times
Reputation: 7010
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kellyanne29 View Post
I think I switched off from the situation...got too into the moment and didn't care for the consequences
Ok. That can happen to everyone. So hopefully, you learned a lesson here about getting too close to taken men. Try not to ever let that happen again, so this type of incident isn't repeated. Now break-ups happen. Guys will upset you. But when you know the man has a girlfriend or wife, you're doubling the chances of unnecessary heartache. A man who cheats, proves they are not trustworthy.

And in the future, be more logical. Think about possible consequences beforehand, and not run on pure emotion / hedonism. Live and Learn.

The 1st thing to do here, is block this guy and cut him off. He may text or call, don't bother with him, and focus on single life with other single men.
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