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I knew he wouldn't leave..that wasn't what's upset me ...his dad left him when he was a baby,I knew he wouldn't,I wouldn't want that. What hurts is how he can just cut me off after everything..it's a total head screw situation.
I can't help that I'm hurt..
If I were foolish enough to cheat by banging one of my friends, I'd end the friendship, too. He cut you off because the two of you crossed the line, and it is not worth it to him to jeopardize his relationship with his girlfriend and child.
If I were foolish enough to cheat by banging one of my friends, I'd end the friendship, too. He cut you off because the two of you crossed the line, and it is not worth it to him to jeopardize his relationship with his girlfriend and child.
Why do it in the first place then
It's messing with my head when his mum and sister are telling me he is telling them he doesn't love the gf and wants to leave ..maybe if I didn't know this I could move on.
He might be unhappy but he won't leave
He must think I'm so pathetic and desperate...I'm really not
Then forget him and worry about developing a relationship with a single man. Do you have family and friends you're close to? If so, then this guy is not the only one you can be close to emotionally. In the mean time, date a man who can give you his full attention - romance wise. Because only someone who is desperate settles for being a side piece, and only receiving 1/4 of someone's interest while their SO has the other 3/4 of it.
If you don't have anyone you can talk to, or go to emotionally, then try a counselor. They may be better anyhow because they're paid professionals at helping people, and giving unbiased thoughts, more so than some friends and family.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kellyanne29
Why do it in the first place then
It's messing with my head when his mum and sister are telling me he is telling them he doesn't love the gf and wants to leave ..maybe if I didn't know this I could move on.
He might be unhappy but he won't leave
Same reason you slept with him in the 1st place. You keep questioning why he did what he did. Why did you do what you did? Unless he raped you, or held you at gun point, nothing happened that you didn't want or allow either. Maybe it seemed like a good idea at the time to hi to, now he knows it wasn't. but like you, he didn't think about the effects it'd have at the time.
I did it because I thought he genuinely cared for me and it felt right.
Ok. But we can't read his mind anymore than you. Maybe it felt right to him, and he knows it's not since he's not leaving. Or maybe it very well was all for sex. Why did he pretend to care? because he wanted what he wanted, and it felt good to get away from his relationship for a bit and have a fling where he could vent, and have sex.
Regardless if he doesn't care enough about you to leave his girlfriend, that's all you need to know. And the longer you keep obsessing over him, the longer you'll be in this rut.I understand being upset.
But are you going to continue to be his side chick?
Are you going to wait on him forever and never date again?
Otherwise, there's nothing to do but get over it with hobbies, friends, and not bother with him. Possibly try therapy. Because the more you stick around him, the more you'll want, and pretty soon, resentment will set in when he can't give you the ultimate attention / devotion you're going to want if you continue as the mistress.
You say you aren't desperate. Prove it. There's millions of other men on the planet. Wasting time on one bad guy, whom you aren't even dating, isn't the wisest. Particularly when he's made his choice, and another woman is more important than you. You must think you won't get anything better? because that's the only reason for worrying abut it this much.
It wasn't sexual needs it was the closeness of someone ..holding each other.
I was lonely
You wanted your emotional needs met... by a guy who is in a relationship.
Do you understand that?
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