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There could be your clue. He isn't sure if you are leaving or not.
I got this offer about 3 weeks ago lol the meeting the kids thing is an old issue, and as of yesterday he was still booking appointments to view houses. So he can't be that concerned.
I got this offer about 3 weeks ago lol the meeting the kids thing is an old issue, and as of yesterday he was still booking appointments to view houses. So he can't be that concerned.
Yes, he's basically getting prices. Looking at different areas close by. Seeing what he can get for his dollar basically, I guess. I feel it's way too early, but he insists its better to research.
Yes, he's basically getting prices. Looking at different areas close by. Seeing what he can get for his dollar basically, I guess. I feel it's way too early, but he insists its better to research.
So that means he really is into it - the move - moving together - taking the next step.
Passive is not a style in handling situations where your involvement plays an intrinsic role in the development of.
That's straight out avoidance and it's on your part.
Now in the end it's all piled up and your going to dump all of this out and say your fed up and enough is enough.
You had this choice all along, you CHOSE to not get involved and let things take you wherever they went. Stop blaming other people for self created issues.
Where you are now, almost three years in is becuase of the choices you made to sit back and let others handle the problems you faced within the coupling.
Outside of every issue his realtionship faces, this is the realization you need to make for yourself. It's the only thing that will prevent unwanted situations from happening to you onward.
Last edited by rego00123; 10-13-2015 at 03:40 PM..
Self created issues? You really are stretching it now dude. I don't blame anyone but myself for the choices I have made. Do not assume to know me and how I handle issues. Passive is passive, it is not avoidance. I am convinced that some of you that can only bring negative thoughts to this space have gone through, or put someone else through, issues like you read on forums like this and get all uppity about it. Relax. The issue is what it is. I can't make him change. He has a right to his opinions and views, just as I do, just as you do. I will state, again, that all I wanted to know was if I was being to pushy in what I was asking. Just for some opinions. Not for crazy assumptions.
Self created issues? You really are stretching it now dude. I don't blame anyone but myself for the choices I have made. Do not assume to know me and how I handle issues. Passive is passive, it is not avoidance. I am convinced that some of you that can only bring negative thoughts to this space have gone through, or put someone else through, issues like you read on forums like this and get all uppity about it. Relax. The issue is what it is. I can't make him change. He has a right to his opinions and views, just as I do, just as you do. I will state, again, that all I wanted to know was if I was being to pushy in what I was asking. Just for some opinions. Not for crazy assumptions.
You really dont get it...
You're not wrong for wanting the kind of life you want to have, it's not an unreasonable thing to desire. The rest of it is questionable...you're questioning if this is the right person for what YOU want because they have not given you reason to believe so mutiple times over many years. yet you stuck in their becuase your feel you are better served being passive instead of direct (presumably to not rock the boat)
You can try to be all understanding In your approach to differences with the people you have choosen to involve yourself with, but only one thing matters at the end of that understanding you make with people. that YOU have to make a choice to take yourself and where you want to go with your life.
this is why we need to seek out people who have similar beliefs and goals. Their is a shared path and goal in mind under similar ideogies and philosophies. The paths are similar enough that the differences will not be an obstacle to indivual long term goals and the shared are already mutual in nature.
Passiveness is not a choice, it's a lack of one. It's choosing to not involve yourself and just react to the world happening around you, not making the world around you. It's taki your choice away and being relaint on others to direct your focus.
I'll leave it to the others who will be a little more catered to your sensibilities to reply from this point out.
Last edited by rego00123; 10-13-2015 at 04:31 PM..
Self created issues? You really are stretching it now dude. I don't blame anyone but myself for the choices I have made. Do not assume to know me and how I handle issues. Passive is passive, it is not avoidance. I am convinced that some of you that can only bring negative thoughts to this space have gone through, or put someone else through, issues like you read on forums like this and get all uppity about it. Relax. The issue is what it is. I can't make him change. He has a right to his opinions and views, just as I do, just as you do. I will state, again, that all I wanted to know was if I was being to pushy in what I was asking. Just for some opinions. Not for crazy assumptions.
It is self-creative in the sense that you have allowed it to continue this long. Two and a half years of dating with the intention of moving in together... there is no excuse for him to keep you from developing relationship with his children at this point, unless he doesn't plan on keeping you around.
It is self-creative in the sense that you have allowed it to continue this long. Two and a half years of dating with the intention of moving in together... there is no excuse for him to keep you from developing relationship with his children at this point, unless he doesn't plan on keeping you around.
After one year I would have met the ex wife. I would have said "let's call her up and ask her if she is available on ... or on ...."
If he comes with dumb excuses, I would question his commitment to me.
I would not plan living together with people (kids) you don't even know!!! You will move in ... and move out ... a few weeks or months later because no way this is going to work out if you don't get to know them beforehand.
You will be an intruder to them. Your bf already told you that you have nothing to say when it comes to HIS kids who will live part time in YOUR house. That doesn't make sense AT ALL.
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