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if it bothers you, then don't date women like that. Because those women will never be able to help you get over that problem and make you feel like a confidant man. Only you can do that. Who knows why those type of women are attracted to you. Maybe they just see you as a MAN...even when you don't. You are insecure because in the back of your mind, you question your own masculinity for not liking those things. But, there is no law that says men have to like putting a bullet in a deer, or building a car engine. Just like those women who like to hunt, fish, etc aren't running around taking ballet lessons or knitting.
Until you learn those things don't make a man, then stay away from women who can change a tire, and find one who crochets and loves to shop. That way y'all can do things together
Lol well I can't say I am into those things either but I cant say that I would be more attracted to someone like that over someone like this oddly enough.
My dog walks in and was all wide open and jumping around all over the place so I was trying to calm her down and she took the place to discipline her and then explain to me I was not assertive enough....that was kind of the straw to break the camel's back for me.
That's a little bit different from "liking manly hobbies."
Separate from your issue of needing a dependent woman to make you feel like a man.
That's entirely in your head. If she shares them, then build on them as common interests. Then expand your pallet by taking an interest in some of her interests.
I think my problem with the similar interests is the competion. I mean to be quite frank, she is much more knowledgeable and competitive than I am in most of the areas of similar interest (which is how we even got to know each other to begin with).
I mean I know alot of this is an insecurity, but to be honest I feel like that insecurity is much more present since I have hung out with her and its not like she did that on purpose or anything either.
I think my problem with the similar interests is the competion. I mean to be quite frank, she is much more knowledgeable and competitive than I am in most of the areas of similar interest (which is how we even got to know each other to begin with).
I mean I know alot of this is an insecurity, but to be honest I feel like that insecurity is much more present since I have hung out with her and its not like she did that on purpose or anything either.
You're making it a competition. Why is that? Why not have a little humility and acknowledge sometimes someone knows more about something than you do? Like I said, my wife is learning to use power tools. She also is constantly giving me fitness and nutrition advice even though to look at us both you'd assume I was the one who knew more about fitness/nutrition. That area doesn't come as easily to her as it does to me and as a result she's far more read and researched than I am.
Relationships thrive under humility and struggle when ego gets in the way. Check your pride at the door and don't make it a competition.
That's a little bit different from "liking manly hobbies."
Separate from your issue of needing a dependent woman to make you feel like a man.
I am not trying to say that I need a dependent woman to make me feel like a man, I don't think that at all but that situation just turned me off when she did that. I know it is separate from the issue we are talking about but it was just yet another thing that I came across.
It is honestly IMO not a lack of compatibility here because she is also very much interested in what I am interested in which in this case, is what makes it such a tough call because we really do get along, like a lot of the same stuff minus some of the things I had mentioned as her interests but I just can't for whatever reason get over the fact that I feel emasculated by her. I mean I am honestly trying not to be, but just as an example the other day, she was at my house and we were watching the news. My dog walks in and was all wide open and jumping around all over the place so I was trying to calm her down and she took the place to discipline her and then explain to me I was not assertive enough....that was kind of the straw to break the camel's back for me.
Another thing in this particular situation is as I mentioned, she shares most of my interests too and is very well versed in them which is great, but I mean it really kind of gives me nothing to bring to the table I feel like.
That all being the case, is it more of a personality issue? She's "type A" and you're not? Is it her assertiveness off-putting or connected to your feeling inferior?
We do live in a society where men are expected to be tough and "manly," where they have to prove themselves by doing things commonly accepted as "manly" when that may not reflect all men.
If she's interested in what you're into, you share commonalities, then perhaps you perceive an imbalance? She's into the things you're into, but not vice versa? On top of that she has a more assertive personality. If this wasn't the case would you still have reservations?
I'm not into any of that stuff either and I wouldn't want to hang out with a woman into hunting... just not my thing, just as it sounds like it's not yours either.
I don't know why you have to label things and start to beat yourself over feeling emasculated.
I can most certainly promise you that you will run into more women not into those things that are into them.
You're making it a competition. Why is that? Why not have a little humility and acknowledge sometimes someone knows more about something than you do? Like I said, my wife is learning to use power tools. She also is constantly giving me fitness and nutrition advice even though to look at us both you'd assume I was the one who knew more about fitness/nutrition. That area doesn't come as easily to her as it does to me and as a result she's far more read and researched than I am.
Relationships thrive under humility and struggle when ego gets in the way. Check your pride at the door and don't make it a competition.
I completely agree and would be happy to learn many things from her or anyone I date and I am not at all upset with someone knowing more than I do, but I mean there really isnt much that she can learn from me since she is basically the expert out of the two of us in the things I am interested in.
Just being a good guy is wonderful, but I have to contribute something else, that can't be all.
I am not trying to say that I need a dependent woman to make me feel like a man, I don't think that at all ...
Quote:
Originally Posted by ColaClemsonFan11
she shares most of my interests too and is very well versed in them which is great, but I mean it really kind of gives me nothing to bring to the table I feel like.
So what do YOU think this ^^^ means???
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