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I think at this point he gave up. And they are not bad kids. They just needs lots of encouragement and positive reinforcement.
They also have the worlds worst mothers and have resentment issues.
Like I said, he needs to get his priorities straight. I'm sure they are not bad kids. They are just looking for stability, guidance, limits, and structure. Those are the things he should be concentrating on learning how to give them.
If he wants to be a good dad, he should be devouring books on the current methodology of parenting teenagers.
Either there is something about you that encourages and attracts dysfunction or most of the dysfunctional people are all living in your area, like a dysfunctional Bermuda Triangle.
Honest to god we joke that I have a magnet that attracts crazy people. I can be standing in an aisle reading labels at Target and the oddest people will just walk up to me with crazy comments, weird stories or just being odd. I won't go to Walmart alone any longer. I don't even have to speak and they walk to me.
My best friends ex is as crazy as they come. Like certifiably, on medication to keep him sane. In an entire fair he happened to sit next to me twice in the same weekend. What are the odds with 10,000 people at the event. Seriously it happens all the time. The crazy people sit right next to me and the normal sane people move to the other side of the room. And I try to be so polite, tell them have a good day while detangling myself from them.
My lawyer says it's because I make everyone feel better about themselves. I am always complimentary and find the good in everyone. I know I cannot fix them, but it does not hurt me to tell them something polite before I make my escape.
I use to have to visit a local jail for work. Those visits were never dull.
OP, do you REALLY have feelings for this man or is he just your current 'port in the storm' so to speak? Is he worth all of the drama and the crap that is involved? If not, then be DONE.
Sometimes, you gotta let go.
He does not get that often. We have four kids between us and almost never kid free.
Yes of course I do, he was one of my best friends long before we dated. When my sons father tried killing me, it was my boyfriend, who was not my bf at the time that stayed at my house to protect the kids and I.
I know I cannot fix them, but it does not hurt me to tell them something polite before I make my escape.
You seem to have very low self-awareness and/or self-responsibility regarding your actions and seem to rationalize things away.
A normal person would see the huge role the above statement would play in your attracting the crazies. You are very self-delusional if you think you "just stand there" and all the crazy people just pick you out for no reason at all.
Like I said, he needs to get his priorities straight. I'm sure they are not bad kids. They are just looking for stability, guidance, limits, and structure. Those are the things he should be concentrating on learning how to give them.
If he wants to be a good dad, he should be devouring books on the current methodology of parenting teenagers.
Add in therapy to get over the mom issues, meds for the depression, and the court system removing the moms from their lives, and they may be ok.
I tried giving them all that when they came to my house. They got nightly dinner, help with home work, lots of hugs and attention when they wanted it, space when they wanted that and everyone was happy. Then it changed. I can only be there if they allow me to be.
I really wish the court system would stop encouraging / requiring visitation with dysfunctional parents. It is sad.
You seem to have very low self-awareness and/or self-responsibility regarding your actions and seem to rationalize things away.
A normal person would see the huge role the above statement would play in your attracting the crazies. You are very self-delusional if you think you "just stand there" and all the crazy people just pick you out for no reason at all.
Ok come to walmart with me. I will prove it to you. I attract crazy people and don't even need to open my mouth.
Ok come to walmart with me. I will prove it to you. I attract crazy people and don't even need to open my mouth.
Just stop. You KEEP the dysfunction. Your BF only comes over for sex at this point.
I attract crazies too, I'll go to Walmart and the weird person will make a b line and talk to me, outside the homeless person all but corners me...... it's not special, it's not karma, it happens to almost every one.
For 6 years the missing teeth no shirt wearing maintenance guy has called me like once a quarter. Why? I have NO idea, I do not answer. I answered once and he's like "so ya doin?". No. We do not do that. I move past the crazy to my car, my home, pets and husband.
You don't have to adopt human detriment.
What is wrong with you?
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Ok come to walmart with me. I will prove it to you. I attract crazy people and don't even need to open my mouth.
Why do you continue to be SO proud of this? You repeat it over and over and over. You seem to think that just because you ATTRACT crazy that you have to ACCCEPT crazy! Where did you ever get such a messed up view as that?
Are you so crazed for attention that you take everything and everyone you can get? Normal people pick and choose who they CONTINUE to associate with. Oh, I know, your small town makes you be friends with everyone. NO - it means you say "hi" and walk on by. You're a people pleaser and you seem to think you have no control over that. As long as you're helpless then quit asking others for advice that you're helpless to act on.
OP, you REALLY need to focus on raising your kids to adulthood at this point in your life.
Forget the boy toys and all that crap. You can find your "life partner" AFTER your kids are grown and gone.
Priorities are YOUR KIDS. Put them first.
Spoiler
As far as the crazies flocking to you, I was going to say "birds of a feather"....
Hee hee hee.
But seriously...raise your kids FIRST.
Nope I want a life partner.
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