Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Well, 37% of the prison population is black. 70% of black children grow up in single parent households. That part of the math is pretty easy. Prison is what we do with males of the permanent underclass until their testosterone level drops. It would be better to break the cycle of single parent poverty than stash their male children in jail but our society lacks the courage to adopt public policy that would break the cycle.
Correct. And look at the ration of **** I'm taking for saying the kid would be better off being adopted by a two parent family. And the elites who are running the show want a permanent underclass. It's easier to control and manipulate people with major emotional deficiencies, after all.
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffD
There are plenty of single mothers who do a perfectly fine job raising their children. Most got their education, established their career, and ended up with the wrong guy. They're in a far different position to manage their lives than somebody who is uneducated, unemployable, and ends up a single mother.
I wouldn't say "perfectly fine". I think something's missing if there's not a mom and a dad under the same roof. Granted, sometimes divorce is the lesser of two evils, but it's still an evil. But I will agree the former situation, while very far from ideal, is better than the latter.
Whoa! Where did the shame thing come from? That's you projecting and (deliberately?) misinterpreting stuff I said.
It's all over this thread. I don't remember who said it, specifically. But there have been numerous attacks on the OP, accusing her of being selfish for wanting to keep the baby, rather than give it up. 'You're dooming your child to a life of poverty and prison', they say. These comments are designed to make her feel bad. I'm sure there are statistics involving children of single parents vs those with two parents, and there's nothing wrong with providing those, to help her make a decision. But when you start slamming her personally, saying that she's selfish, doesn't care about the welfare of her baby (seriously?), and needs to 'do the right thing' (as if keeping your child is a wrong thing) that's trying to force her to make a decision based on guilt/shame.
Well, it was NOT ME. And I DO NOT APPRECIATE BEING PAINTED WITH YOUR BROAD BRUSH, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
Sigh. Okay. I went back and looked through the posts, and yours have not been the most harsh ones. So I apologize if I had/gave that impression. However, it seems like you have been pushing hard with the whole "children of single parents statistically don't turn out well" thing. You've even suggested that the worst two parent family situation is better than a single parent family (or that we're all lying about it)*. It's a little tiresome and makes people (including myself) feel defensive. We get the idea. Your feelings on this matter have been noted.
*"And when confronted with this fact, people will always make up a 'worst possible' 2 parent family scenario to defend their point of view. It's a very weak argument." <--broad brush, anyone?
Sigh. Okay. I went back and looked through the posts, and yours have not been the most harsh ones. So I apologize if I had/gave that impression.
Thank you. Apology accepted.
Quote:
Originally Posted by scatteredthunder
However, it seems like you have been pushing hard with the whole "children of single parents statistically don't turn out well" thing.
Yep, I have been. I stand by it. Because it's the truth. Yes, I get it. No one likes the truth when it's harsh. But avoiding it doesn't make things better.
Quote:
Originally Posted by scatteredthunder
You've even suggested that the worst two parent family situation is better than a single parent family (or that we're all lying about it)*. It's a little tiresome and makes people (including myself) feel defensive. We get the idea. Your feelings on this matter have been noted.
I don't think I've suggested the above. Here is where it gets murky though....People will awfulize a situation to justify doing what they want to do. I also don't like the general tone of these discussions when they justify doing the lesser evil as if there's no other option (i.e. "Well at least she's not going to get an abortion, 'cause that would be worse"--I'm not saying anyone brought up this specific example in this thread, but it's indicative of the general mindset of many).
If you think my pointing out a general truth is tiresome, well that's on you. If I may paraphrase advice columnist Emily Yoffe, I am tired of our culture being out of touch with the needs of children.
*"And when confronted with this fact, people will always make up a 'worst possible' 2 parent family scenario to defend their point of view. It's a very weak argument." <--broad brush, anyone?
Mabye a little. But only a little. There's tons of evidence for this way of thinking on this thread. It's impossible to miss.
Well at least that article also points out the following:
Quote:
It's important to offer some caveats. I am not—the researchers are not—advising marriage at all costs. "Dear Prudence" letter writers should not marry the jerks whom they had drunken procreative sex with and hope never to see again. Nor do I recommend entering into a union with a clearly unstable, unsuitable partner. A survey by the Center for Law and Social Policy on the benefits for children of having married parents did come to the anodyne conclusion that "high conflict" marriages can be as bad for children as having never-married parents. I know. My parents had a "high conflict," violent marriage; I don't recommend it for anyone. Also, growing up in ideal circumstances is no guarantee that one's life will be a happy success, just as growing up in difficult ones does not doom one to be a troubled failure. (See Barack Obama.)
I'm not saying I don't agree with the general ideas in the article. I think it's better for people to be married before having children (or if not, have a relationship that's good enough to get married if pregnancy accidentally occurs). But when you start acting as if marriage-at-all-costs is the only way to go, I have a problem with that.
Having a baby will not change your boyfriend. You will get disappointed all the more if you think that he will change. You are lucky that you found out this early that he is an a**hole.
By the time that you read this, you are already 7 months pregnant and the baby is already making its presence felt. Good for you and I am really happy for you!
Do not be disappointed that you are a single mother. I am a single mother and my daughter is now 27 years old. All the sacrifices, tears are all worth it! Just hang on. At the end, you will tell yourself that it was all worth your time. You know how you'll know it? It would be the kisses, the hugs and the I love yous that you get from your child! And the feeling is indescribable
Good luck and keep praying. You have your family, friends, & most of all, God, who will guide you along the way
You are lucky that you found out this early that he is an a**hole.
She'd have been luckier had she never dating/gotten involved with him. Women are always drawn to horrible men and then are surprised with their horrible actions.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mickyo
Good luck and keep praying. You have your family, friends, & most of all, God, who will guide you along the way
I am not trying to belittle religion, but where was God's guidance when she was impregnated by an unfit father and partner?
God will only guide those under His jurisdiction,
Some one living out side God's influence, will bear the result of their own rebellion.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
