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Old 02-03-2008, 10:55 AM
 
Location: Capitan, NM
7,072 posts, read 11,596,040 times
Reputation: 3338
Quote:
Originally Posted by Steve Bagu View Post
I am probably the only male replying on these topics. I have an idea like most males why women are wearing less and less clothes today. What I am asking is "Why do women think they have to expose so much of their flesh if it is not for SEXUAL GRATIFICATION". Males do not complain. Will some females answer my curiosity via a females perspective only.NO MALE ANSWERS. Thanks Stefhen
Stefhen,
Females dress the way we want to dress. If sometimes we choose to wear less clothing, it is for us and not for sexual gratification. Is your post a joke?

 
Old 02-03-2008, 11:00 AM
 
Location: Capitan, NM
7,072 posts, read 11,596,040 times
Reputation: 3338
Quote:
Originally Posted by KanniJay View Post
So you are saying that this scenario would never happen?

-A girl wore something revealing at a club and met a guy who already had a few drinks. They talked and had a little bit of drinks. He offered to walk her to her car in a parking garage. On the way there, she got raped.

Now had she worn something less revealing, chances of her talking this guy might have been minimized since he might have targeted another girl who seemed easier to approach judging by the way she dressed. With some alcohol in the system and the urge in his pants, a guy would opt for someone who in his opinion, would be an easier 'prey'. .... no?

But no one will know for sure what would have happened. But to play on the safe side, even if it is just a small possibility that wearing revealing clothes could lead to rape (and even though it might not be relevant statistically, if she looked up the statistic before she left the house), if one could, one should eliminate it.
Are you Steve Bagu's girlfriend ????
 
Old 02-03-2008, 12:14 PM
 
Location: Austin, TX
84 posts, read 224,374 times
Reputation: 58
Quote:
Originally Posted by Metlakatla View Post
This has nothing to do with how she was dressed. Allowing a strange man to walk her to a car in a parking garage wasn't a smart move. Neither was going to a club alone.



I truly do despair. If life were only so bloody easy as that. "Just not dressing that way" ain't gonna prevent rape, sistah.

arrgghh..I hate to repeat myself, but here:

"Now had she worn something less revealing, chances of her talking to this guy might have been minimized since he might have targeted another girl who seemed easier to approach judging by the way she dressed".

--> meaning that the guy wouldn't even have picked her as a target on the first place had she worn something less revealing. Period! Finito! With that never have taken place --> the guy wouldn't even gotten a chance to charm her well enough that she would let him walk her to the car.
My statement was not Franz Kafka's that you have to find metaphor or do some deep reading. It is said plain and clear and it is meant exactly how it was said.

It is pointless to keep explaining my point of view to you. I understand that wearing certain clothes would not prevent rapes and I don't argue with that. There is no need to keep stressing that fact.
On the other hand, in the contrary to what you think I meant to say, my answer was NOT an absolute solution for preventing a girl of being raped. But it is about eliminating possibilities just like when people buy insurance. Nothing more nothing less.

My original reply to the thread was merely just that:

"if a woman decides to dress in a revealing way, she can't expect men NOT to stare at the exposed parts or she can't expect men NOT to come up to her in a certain way. Some might know better to contain themselves, but some could be disrespectful. If such an attention is not what you want, opt for classier clothes."

It is not my fault that someone misinterpreted what I said to be an excuse for men to rape women. Again, if people learn to read more effectively instead of putting words into someone's mouth, there might actually be less conflict in this world. Anyhow, it was a good discussion. Unfortunately, it won't go anywhere, but in a circle. So I'm done here.
 
Old 02-03-2008, 12:28 PM
 
15,849 posts, read 15,265,826 times
Reputation: 6898
Quote:
My statement was not Franz Kafka's that you have to find metaphor or do some deep reading.
Uh, yeah; that's already been ascertained.

Quote:
"Now had she worn something less revealing, chances of her talking to this guy might have been minimized since he might have targeted another girl who seemed easier to approach judging by the way she dressed".
And he might have "targeted" her because she was wearing a red sweater. Or had short hair. Rapists don't automatically go for the person wearing the least amount of clothing, which has been my whole point here. Maybe she should have just stayed home in the first place and removed any risk factor at all, eh?

Once again, rapists don't automatically go for the woman wearing the least amount of clothing.

Sorry that's so hard for you to get.
 
Old 02-03-2008, 12:59 PM
 
Location: Orlando, FL
12,153 posts, read 10,346,282 times
Reputation: 6345
Quote:
Originally Posted by SmerkyGrl View Post
Hey, just like how every woman is entitled to how she dresses, she's entitled to her opinion.

While I don't necessarily see women as weak, there are some women who will skankify their wardrobe for some twisted reasons---to follow their friends, to get special attention, to look younger, to follow a trend, etc.

In truth, its not the clothing that bug me but rather the women who dress a certain way and then complain about how they're treated. Honey if you're going to wear a skirt cut up to there, a tube top, and 3 inch boots, you better not complain if/when someone pulls over on the curb and asks if you're working!
That's exactly how I feel. I remember when I was at a club and a girl came in wearing a white net dress - it was very cute but also very see through and she actually had the nerve to wear a lime thong under it, with lime heels. So she's out on the dance floor and a guy stuffs a $ down her dress and she gets pissed ~ now yes of course he shouldn't have done that but if you don't want people treating you like a stripper
 
Old 02-03-2008, 02:18 PM
 
Location: So. of Rosarito, Baja, Mexico
5,150 posts, read 9,746,268 times
Reputation: 3840
Yes,Yes,YES. My original post sure has brought some GOOD replys to my question. I am a SENIOR CITIZEN and have been around the barn more then twice. Recall the clothes of the 50's and see what they are today in comparison. Sure, there are TOPLESS beaches but not TOPLESS (near topless) in the malls. One reply was a slight cleavege and a small slit on the skirt (for what purpose?). I'm not a prude by any imagination but to the contrary I LOVE the VIEW shown me. I am up there but my eyes work real well. Another quick question: Why do women wear REAL HIGH HEELS if not to make their chest protrude far foward and their rear protrude to the rear? Men like myself don't complain as the show keeps going on at the Mall or wherever. NO, NO, NO, my POST was not a JOKE I was sincere in the POST. Last thought, I received a COMPLIMENT via E-MAIL from a C-D Member to my original POST that I had HIT a Question right on the HEAD. It was something many men wondered about. Stefhen
 
Old 02-03-2008, 03:03 PM
 
3,886 posts, read 6,154,254 times
Reputation: 1421
Religious countries like in the Middle east and America have these ideals. Other wise dressing more or less is a womans choice. It doesn't encourage more rude encounters or rape. Americans think of a girl as a **** depending upon what she wears maybe because of the movies or church. People rape children in school clothes and boys and animals if you want to get gross about it. It has nothing to do with the clothing suggesting rape me.
This is ridiculous. You need to do some research on rapers.
Woman in America are finding it harder to keep up Christan values, a lot are not religious so what they wear doesn't make them a ***** anymore. We are just people now. If I want to feel sexy and look sexy to everyone I will. The views of woman on "what is sexy" is what differs.
If a black man wears a suit now a days it doesn't mean he's trying to be like a white man either. It's just 2008 people. We can just live free now, can't we. Most woman I know wouldn't ever date a man who thinks if you wear a short skirt it means it's a secret sign for I'm horny, come get me anyways. There usually way to religious. he he
 
Old 02-03-2008, 03:04 PM
 
Location: Back home to Northern CA
157 posts, read 418,603 times
Reputation: 98
Quote:
Originally Posted by Steve Bagu View Post
I am probably the only male replying on these topics. I have an idea like most males why women are wearing less and less clothes today. What I am asking is "Why do women think they have to expose so much of their flesh if it is not for SEXUAL GRATIFICATION". Males do not complain. Will some females answer my curiosity via a females perspective only.NO MALE ANSWERS. Thanks Stefhen
Stefhan-

A lot of reasons IMO

-To get attention
-Peer Pressure
-Manipulation
-Show off
-Vanity
-Popularity issues
-Rebelling something or someone
 
Old 02-03-2008, 06:48 PM
 
Location: Fort Worth, Texas
10,593 posts, read 21,919,505 times
Reputation: 6050
Personally I find it amazing that anyone believes the concentration should be placed on the victim to stop the occurence of rape.

Why doesn't society put the concentration on stopping rape on the perpetrator?

Women should be able to walk down the street buck naked and not be touched.

Men should HAVE to gain control of themselves. Why doesn't society see this? How often do I hear rapists who have to register as sex offenders griping about it? Almost as often as I hear a connection being drawn between how a woman was dressed, if she went to a club alone connected to why she was raped.

It makes me sick !
 
Old 02-03-2008, 07:16 PM
 
2,023 posts, read 3,434,770 times
Reputation: 1547
Quote:
Originally Posted by Steve Bagu View Post
What I am asking is "Why do women think they have to expose so much of their flesh if it is not for SEXUAL GRATIFICATION".
Ok, I'll bite on this one.

I walk into a bar in sweatpants and a bulky sweater. I have makeup on, and pretty much look like I've actually showered in the past week. But, you get the picture, right?

Now, contrast *that* with me walking into the same bar in a top and jeans that actually show the curves of my body.

Difference in response? You betcha.

And, why would I pick one outfit as opposed to the other? Because the latter would make me feel a lot better about myself than the former. It's much the same reason why, in my past lifetime as a lawyer, I felt REAL good about walking into court wearing an Armani suit. I happen to enjoy when people look at me and say, "wow". I have a heck of a lot to back up my clothing choices, but, IMO, there's no reason not to flaunt what you've got.

In the "bar situation", is that about sexual gratification? Sure, I'll not argue about that. A lot of it, in THAT particular location, has to do with sexuality. BUT...it's also important to think about whose "sexual gratification" you are speaking about. At the end of the day, who do I dress for? Myself. Yeah, I get gratified by seeing some of the responses I get. But, really, what's bad about that?

If you're speaking about "showing skin" as being inherently bad or inherently having some sort of evil in it, I can't respond, because I don't feel that way. But, if you're truly asking WHY women do this, I think my response has spoken for quite a few women out there.

If you haven't, as a man, put on a great suit, or awesome shirt and pants combination, and looked in the mirror, nodded your head and said, "yup", you just wouldn't understand.
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