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Old 11-07-2015, 10:02 AM
 
162 posts, read 201,680 times
Reputation: 199

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What is the big deal. You just barely met the guy. So he stated his opinions to you on religion.

Was what he said racist, discriminatory, or hateful?

1. If so and you are not in agreement with this then drop him.

or

2. If not then he is just being indifferent to religious people and telling you that he doesn't want to have a relationship with someone who is overly religious.

He doesn't want to waste his or your time if you both didn't share this very important topic in all relationships. I must add that you don't normally talk about things of this subject this early in getting to know someone new. But you should be actually grateful because if you happened to be religious you would have dropped him and he would have dropped you. Leaving at the very beginning is much easier than 5 years down the road when time invested and feelings play a role.

You both seem to have this in common so go out on a date with him and talk about something else. If it doesn't workout after the date then go ahead and drop him.

Don't believe all the other crap people will say on here. Most, but not all of them can't maintain their own relationships if they even have one.

Last edited by susman; 11-07-2015 at 10:20 AM..
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Old 11-07-2015, 10:11 AM
 
Location: New Yawk
9,196 posts, read 7,184,840 times
Reputation: 15313
Even as a godless heathen myself, that would be a red flag. Obnoxious diatribes, over how other people choose to focus their attention, are mentally exhausting at best.
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Old 11-07-2015, 10:11 AM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,901 posts, read 42,546,805 times
Reputation: 42767
If you can see yourself with a blowhard who dominates the conversation, give the guy another shot.
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Old 11-07-2015, 10:15 AM
 
22 posts, read 18,071 times
Reputation: 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by ticking View Post
He is likely an uncoordinated idiot, just trying to impress a chick with his 'intellect' and 'discerning palate'. If you got a really bad vibe then don't go out with him. If you are still curious, you can take a look/see. He definitely does't have the greatest judgement, you can see that right away.
I think it was definitely that. I've been out with those types and it's something that rubs me the wrong way.
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Old 11-07-2015, 10:18 AM
 
22 posts, read 18,071 times
Reputation: 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thundarr457 View Post
I would move on. Someone is on his best behavior when he is courting and trying to impress someone. If this was his best I can't imagine his worst. When I met my future wife, we didn't even hold hands because I was so smitten with her and I wasn't sure about her culture (Colombian), so I held off, deciding it was better to err on the side of caution. In the past when I was courting a woman I was always on my best behavior (which was my regular behavior). I would never go into a tirade about religion no matter what I thought. I look at life this way, when we are born we are like a blank book and life fills in the pages. Each time we have an experience whether good or bad it affects us (maybe just a little). Don't waste your time with a potential relationship that is setting off alarm bells after 4 days. Just think, a much better person is out there and you could miss them while you waste your time with this. You are young (23), and you have your whole life ahead of you, and deserve the best so don't sell yourself short. I see from your previous posts you were dating someone in their 40's so at least your making progress, but seriously do you think that little of yourself that you can't find someone your own age or at least close?
Someone my age isn't exactly better. Why would I be thinking little of myself if I'm attracted to men older than me? I went out on a date with a 22 year old a month ago and I was not impressed with his immaturity and his boyish size. Just my preference.
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Old 11-07-2015, 10:24 AM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
1,384 posts, read 1,051,917 times
Reputation: 1635
I don't see what the issue is.

It sounds like you're trying to create red flags. Just go out with him and see what happens. You have nothing to lose.
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Old 11-07-2015, 10:32 AM
 
Location: Canada
11,756 posts, read 11,944,820 times
Reputation: 30135
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mialady View Post
I (23) met this local guy(30) on social media 4 days ago and we've been texting since then. I found out a lot about him and he seemed like someone I could get a long great with and have a fun time with.

Yesterday(because we were both really busy until then) we finally talk on the phone and he goes on a tangent about religion. He says he's not atheist but hates other people who are so into religion.

Now, I'm not really religious but the way he went on about this for 20 minutes of our conversation had me scared. We barely had a conversation. It was just him rambling about what he hates about really religious people.

Is this a sign I should look elsewhere, because I was really uncomfortable with how the talk went. Or should I go on a first date and see how we vibe and make the decision then?

What makes me think I will end up annoyed by him is that I dated another really opinionated man who talked with the same intonation. And that was the one reason why I was glad we broke up.
Your gut is trying to tell you something. Even the fact that you felt the need to post about it here tells you something is off.

No matter what the topic, talking to someone on the phone for the first time should not ever include a diatribe or hatred toward others. I wouldn't tolerate that from people I love and care about, let alone a complete stranger. I wouldn't invest another minute of your time, and move on to find someone else who hasn't already turned you off before even meeting.
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Old 11-07-2015, 10:35 AM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,192 posts, read 25,067,600 times
Reputation: 22274
If you need to post a thread about someone before you've even met them, chances are it's not going to work out. I mean, unless the thread is, "I've been talking to the best guy ever!"
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Old 11-07-2015, 10:55 AM
 
Location: Hamburg, Deutschland
1,248 posts, read 817,475 times
Reputation: 1915
Quote:
Originally Posted by Akonyo View Post
I don't see what the issue is.

It sounds like you're trying to create red flags. Just go out with him and see what happens. You have nothing to lose.
The issue is that (oh the horror!) the guy is not a Mr. Perfect who always does everything just the way people expect him to. None of us is, neither men nor women.
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Old 11-07-2015, 10:57 AM
 
Location: Middle of the valley
48,287 posts, read 34,411,101 times
Reputation: 73226
Was it a conversation or a one-sided rant?

If you find his views unreasonable or he monopolized the whole first conversation with you, then I wouldn't bother.
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