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Just thought I'd chime in and say I'm super ultra terrible on the phone but not in real life. I'm still awkward on the phone when talking to my wife. I'm just terrible on the phone and prefer face-to-face 100% of the time.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Japanfan1986
I never call someone before a date just texting. I guess I prefer the awkwardness in person!
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I do the same thing. My voice cracks a lot on the phone so I'd rather face my date where I can at least control my voice better than to give them an awkward vibe about me and not even make it to the date. Before anyone takes this opportunity to talk about it, I do work on the phone for a living.
Some of you mentioned that talking on the phone is becoming outdated, which is true, and yet it seems like any time I connect with a woman online she insists on a phone call before we meet. And at least a few times, the initial phone calls have been so natural and the chemistry so obvious that I was eager to meet them in person. Which is why I really have no desire to pursue anything further when the conversation was clunky and distant. This woman seemed bored to tears talking to me and mostly let me ask all the questions, as though she couldn't think of a single thing to ask me. I don't see future meetings being much different.
WHy didn't you make the phone conversation less awkward. Youre a man, learn how to lead.
Phone calls allows women to hear your voice, so they can judge compatibility using another sense. Its very common. You just gotta get your game together. Remember this: in a traditional setting, if you are with a woman or talking to a woman, you are the one with sole control of chemistry, awkwardness and how two of you relate. If you are relaxed and playful, she will become relaxed and playful within minutes. If you feel anxious and awkward, she will feel anxious and awkward within minutes. Tip for guys that want to get laid: If you feel sexual, she will feel sexual within minutes. No easier way to get laid, than to create sexual chemistry between you and the woman.
WHy didn't you make the phone conversation less awkward. Youre a man, learn how to lead.
Phone calls allows women to hear your voice, so they can judge compatibility using another sense. Its very common. You just gotta get your game together. Remember this: in a traditional setting, if you are with a woman or talking to a woman, you are the one with sole control of chemistry, awkwardness and how two of you relate. If you are relaxed and playful, she will become relaxed and playful within minutes. If you feel anxious and awkward, she will feel anxious and awkward within minutes. Tip for guys that want to get laid: If you feel sexual, she will feel sexual within minutes. No easier way to get laid, than to create sexual chemistry between you and the woman.
How would you suggest making a phone call less awkward? I spent the whole time asking her typical getting-to-know-you questions, using humor when appropriate, and doing my best to show genuine interest in her responses. Most of my questions were met with very half-hearted answers, then silence. She asked very few questions of her own. What more could I have done?
You change things up to see what she responds too. Crack a joke, be conservative, be crazy, be interested, be disinterested. She will start responding to you being one way or the other. Once you know what gets her talking or feeling more comfortable, play off of that. Its no different than meeting someone in person and reading their body language. If you are really close to someone and they seem uncomfortable, you take a step back and continue the conversation. It should be very natural and normal, but you have to pay attention to details. The more you do this, the better you get at it.
I normally keep all phone and text conversations with women brief and to the point. I'm not there so we can chat for hours like she would with her girlfriends. I usually limit calls to setting up a meeting in person. This way I can use a lot more than my voice to make her feel comfortable and safe with me. That's how you create "chemistry"
I've had a couple of conversations that were like pulling teeth. One in particular - he was a very nice guy but I had to carry the conversation, and when I wasn't talking the line was basically dead. I admit that I hate talking on the phone, but I do think it's a necessary step when you're getting to know someone. If a phone call is impossible, I'm likely to pass.
For this exact reason, I like to keep the phone conversations before meeting pretty short and sweet. I agree it's good to hear the person's voice, but I'm not great at talking on the phone. When I meet a woman in person and get to know her, it makes the phone calls easier. I would never rule out a woman I had interest in just because of an awkward phone call. I'd at least meet up with her in person and of for whatever reason it was awkward/ no chemistry, then I'd move on.
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about it, I do work on the phone for a living.
