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We jumped in quick, IDK, I don't want to get sappy, but I think we both felt a connection with each other that we've never felt before, but we were both young, I was early 20's she was later 20's. IDK... I've been reluctant to really judge too much in this thread cause everyone is different. There was never really any thoughts about it, but again, we were young and I think when young people get together there is less head and more heart.
I went over to her house one time and never left, I would stay overnight with her and then go home in the morning to shower for work. Then my living situation changed and we just decided at the point to "officially" move in together. That is the cliff notes version of us.
Maybe not official camp...... maybe just day camp?
He is old enough to know better to come on just as strong rushing in to things and pulling the rug out from under both of them.
He is treating her badly and she has done nothing to deserve that.
I wasn't condoning his behavior and I already criticized it, my point was addressing the other poster in calling someone a whackdoodle for being nervous and being a bit skittish for moving too fast, I think it's a perfectly normal reaction to maybe get a bit nervous if things are going quickly, I mean people have baggage and in the 40's we've all been hurt by then. So it doesn't seem out the realm to me. To lead her on and play that "I'll let you know later" move he did wasn't cool, to leave her hanging wasn't cool, to have those feelings.... human.
Chow I love your story too. You guys surely deserve each other and I mean that in the best possible way.
My update is that he did call but was so vague about everything that I finally just told him that it's obvious that he's not all that interested and I'm moving on. It was surely the most frustrating conversation I've had in my life but so annoying I'm not even sad anymore because I'm looking for a real man. I've also come to the conclusion that when a man requests a slow down, that's code for "Let's kick it back to FWB." I kind of hate him right now.
Chow I love your story too. You guys surely deserve each other and I mean that in the best possible way.
My update is that he did call but was so vague about everything that I finally just told him that it's obvious that he's not all that interested and I'm moving on. It was surely the most frustrating conversation I've had in my life but so annoying I'm not even sad anymore because I'm looking for a real man. I've also come to the conclusion that when a man requests a slow down, that's code for "Let's kick it back to FWB." I kind of hate him right now.
I'm sorry you're feeling that way right now....... You're a strong person and will be ok, I can tell by your posts for the last few yrs.... I hope things work out for you in the future, for those who are good and decent, good things shall come and I believe that.....
That's a surprisingly immature attitude for someone who's "already" 49.
My husband's grandfather lived 35 years past this dude's age, so your predicted expiration date would have meant nothing there. Yet, according to you, he shouldn't use discretion when choosing someone to (hopefully) spend the rest of those years with??
You misunderstood me. Of course everyone should use discretion. Point is, he didn't. He came on super strong, and then "got scared."
I stand by my assertion that he's too old for that nonsense. He should know better than to come on strong and go rushing into things like that if doing so is going to run counter to his own comfort zone. He should know himself well enough by now, and be able to control himself well enough by now, to have used a little restraint.
Instead, he played the role of the smitten suitor, and when the time came to get real, he got "scared." That's the crap 22-year-olds with their heads up their butts do.
Chow I love your story too. You guys surely deserve each other and I mean that in the best possible way.
My update is that he did call but was so vague about everything that I finally just told him that it's obvious that he's not all that interested and I'm moving on. It was surely the most frustrating conversation I've had in my life but so annoying I'm not even sad anymore because I'm looking for a real man. I've also come to the conclusion that when a man requests a slow down, that's code for "Let's kick it back to FWB." I kind of hate him right now.
Good for you, Stepka. Life is too short for that--at any age.
You misunderstood me. Of course everyone should use discretion. Point is, he didn't. He came on super strong, and then "got scared."
I stand by my assertion that he's too old for that nonsense. He should know better than to come on strong and go rushing into things like that if doing so is going to run counter to his own comfort zone. He should know himself well enough by now, and be able to control himself well enough by now, to have used a little restraint.
Instead, he played the role of the smitten suitor, and when the time came to get real, he got "scared." That's the crap 22-year-olds with their heads up their butts do.
Actually Jasper, I think you have got this completely correct--he really should be old enough to know better.
Chow I love your story too. You guys surely deserve each other and I mean that in the best possible way.
My update is that he did call but was so vague about everything that I finally just told him that it's obvious that he's not all that interested and I'm moving on. It was surely the most frustrating conversation I've had in my life but so annoying I'm not even sad anymore because I'm looking for a real man. I've also come to the conclusion that when a man requests a slow down, that's code for "Let's kick it back to FWB." I kind of hate him right now.
Kind of sounds like you dodged the bullet for a potential to a bad marriage. Good thing he showed his true colors early enough. Wishy-washy is not sexy...nor desirable behavior for making a good relationship.
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I kind of hate him right now. 
