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Old 11-09-2008, 05:03 PM
 
14,755 posts, read 14,166,627 times
Reputation: 8135
Quote:
Originally Posted by artsyguy View Post
Why should you shut down when a relationship takes work??
Are you asking me? I wasn't the one who posted this, however, I will give my opinion.

A lot of times, going in, you hit the "dealbreakers" early on. It's a personal decision whether to invest or whether to cut your losses, right?
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Old 11-09-2008, 05:05 PM
 
25,170 posts, read 33,142,835 times
Reputation: 6678
ya man good input. I was actually asking Mr. Perfect Pants aka: Jonathan
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Old 11-09-2008, 05:09 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, TN
8,002 posts, read 12,927,603 times
Reputation: 12205
I sure do miss StacyK's post.

Divorce? What's that?
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Old 11-09-2008, 08:23 PM
 
Location: AZ
2,183 posts, read 3,649,002 times
Reputation: 1533
Quote:
Originally Posted by Interpol76 View Post
The 5th or 6th highest in the world. Looks at these stats...

DivorceMag: World Divorce Statistics
Divorce rates are so high because people give up to easily on their marriage.
Alot of people seem to always be looking for the next best thing. In my opinion you shouldnt marry someone unless you truly love them with all of your heart. To me marriage is a one time thing and its forever. If you have problems you work through them together that will bring you even closer- you dont run away and end your marriage because its not working out like a fairytale.
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Old 11-09-2008, 08:35 PM
 
Location: San Salvador, El Salvador
567 posts, read 935,437 times
Reputation: 238
Quote:
Originally Posted by Interpol76 View Post
The 5th or 6th highest in the world. Looks at these stats...

DivorceMag: World Divorce Statistics

Because people don't understand that marriage isn't easy and we are too lazy to work on our problems. Which brings up another question, if straight people are doing a **** poor job at staying married how could they dare claim the name of Jesus Christ to stop gays from being married.
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Old 11-09-2008, 08:48 PM
 
2,251 posts, read 3,141,582 times
Reputation: 1115
Quote:
Originally Posted by artsyguy View Post
ya man good input. I was actually asking Mr. Perfect Pants aka: Jonathan
Because I do enough work during my life, I don't want my relationships to require a bunch of work, too. Otherwise it's not worth it. I work 80 hour weeks when I'm healthy, and even a light week will be 60 hours. I don't have the time or energy to expend MORE work when I'm supposed to be having fun! I'd rather be single and watching a great TV show, relaxing, watching sports, etc.

Everyone acts like it's just some sort of necessary evil, but why? I've had a lot of close guy friends for many years. One of my closest friends I've known since 1st grade! Most of my other friends are from high school, I've known them for ten years now. It's never a bunch of work being friends with them. We hang out, have fun, etc. It's not like I have to put constant daily work into being friends with them. There's no good reason why a relationship with a girl should be so much different. If it's natural and we're compatible, it should be fun. Are there going to be disagreements or arguments? Sure, that even happens with guy friends. But I don't want a drama queen who I have to work constantly to appease like I'm some UN diplomat. If that's what a relationship is, just constant effort and work, then no thanks! I don't want that. I'd rather be single forever than have to deal with that crap. The benefits must outweigh the disadvantages or it's not worth my time. This goes without saying, really. All of life is a cost-benefit analysis, no matter what you are doing. The reason I don't want to order a pizza tonight for instance is because it would cost me $25 to get my order and I would rather get my $5 Subway sandwich because I don't judge the pizza to be worth 5 times more than my Subway. Some nights, I'm tired of Subway, I judge it's worth it to pay more money and get something different. Everything is about costs and benefits, and if it comes out on the positive side you pull the trigger and make the decision. Life and how well you live it are based on your ability to weigh pros and cons and make the proper decision based on the information you have. Nobody is perfect at doing that, but the better you are at it the better your life will be in all respects.
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Old 11-10-2008, 12:09 PM
 
14,755 posts, read 14,166,627 times
Reputation: 8135
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonathanLB View Post
Because I do enough work during my life, I don't want my relationships to require a bunch of work, too. Otherwise it's not worth it. I work 80 hour weeks when I'm healthy, and even a light week will be 60 hours. I don't have the time or energy to expend MORE work when I'm supposed to be having fun! I'd rather be single and watching a great TV show, relaxing, watching sports, etc.
I will have to give jonathan this one. If you have a 40 hour a week JOB, then there's not as much room to complain. If you have a career or profession where the hours can FLEX and EXPAND at a moment's notice, your tolerance for drama DECREASES immensely.

In reality, if two people get along, then it's really not that much work. In fact, it ought to make your life easier. It's when there's bad chemistry and friction, oftentimes useless, that a relationship becomes work.

I hardly think of taking kids to school, washing the pets, or figuring out the division of duties as WORK. However, if it's difficult people that are involved, then it is WORK.

Lastly, why is the divorce rate so high? Good Gawd....just look at this sub-thread and look at all the petty, litigious questions that are posed! "****...or get off the pot!"
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Old 11-10-2008, 12:19 PM
 
Location: Chicago, Illinois
3,014 posts, read 5,774,596 times
Reputation: 1303
it's a product of society. Americans revolve around a box...the television. and when the most watched/popular programs are shows titled "Dirty, Sexy, Money" and "Desperate Housewives" is this really a shocker?

American society has degenerated quite a bit from the 60's.
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Old 11-10-2008, 12:58 PM
miu
 
Location: MA/NH
12,955 posts, read 21,504,987 times
Reputation: 10082
Americans are too much in love with the concept of true love. When the crush feelings wear off, they pout and throw in the towel.

I also think that many couples marry too quick and while they are still in the crush mode. When one is in the crush mode, the problems with the relationship are covered up.

More couples need to worry less about keeping that crush feeling high alive and more about finding a mate with similar interests, goals and life values. Marrying someone from a totally different culture or background is not always the wisest path to take.

Then lastly, too many couples follow with what their heart and sexual organs want, and don't think enough with their brains.
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Old 11-10-2008, 01:01 PM
 
943 posts, read 1,848,516 times
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Becasue we are a microwave nation.. meaning we want everything fast and we don't have the patience for anything anymore. We rush into everything and we rush out of everything.
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