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I am potentially interested in a very nice lady at work (we also have completely different office work units, different bosses, chiefs, etc.). She has shown what I felt were some very concrete and noticeable, obvious signs of interest in the past, but I don't know for sure if she is currently interested or not. I do know that when she and I spoke recently on social media, her latest personal message had *a lot* of smile emoticons (about 5-6 or more total), if that hopefully helps in any way? I'm also pretty sure that she doesn't have a special someone in her life at the moment, although I could be wrong of course, since I haven't exactly asked her directly about that.
I know that workplace romances are generally discouraged in popular culture, but this lady is a really, really nice and kindhearted person, and I would love to have even a chance to try for something long-term (or even more), with her. Not interested in anything short-term at all. I'm hoping that the fact that we report to completely different middle-managers and higher-level managers, and are completely and multiple different organizational units away from each other could at least help partially mitigate some of the possible pitfalls of relationships in the workplace?
I don't believe in the blanket "don't date co-workers," especially in circumstances like yours where you are separated while AT work.
All you can do is take a risk and ask her to do something like go to lunch, where you can get to know her a little better and assess her actual interest.
I know this will be repeated but my advice: don't date coworkers.
Even if they may also potentially be interested in you as well though? I thought the prohibition / proscription against dating co-workers was for short-term flings or ONS, not necessarily long-term relationships? Also that a substantial number of people may have met their spouses, sometimes in a workplace environment? (In the past here at the office for example, we even had a married couple who worked here together, although one of them later left for a different job.)
Last edited by Phoenix2017; 02-01-2016 at 12:03 PM..
There's an old saying : Don't dip your pen on the company's ink
Remember this and take it with a grain of salt to never date someone at work.
I thought that was advice not to get into short-term relationships (office flings, ONS, etc.). Does it also apply to trying for longer-term relationships as well though?
I don't believe in the blanket "don't date co-workers," especially in circumstances like yours where you are separated while AT work.
All you can do is take a risk and ask her to do something like go to lunch, where you can get to know her a little better and assess her actual interest.
Thanks for your helpful advice Just curious, do you have any additional advice or thoughts on your suggestion above, about how to go about asking her to meet for lunch or something similar, so that it also stays sufficiently low-key and doesn't sound too overly strong in terms of the actual request, if I was going to try to consider that option?
I thought that was advice not to get into short-term relationships (office flings, ONS, etc.). Does it also apply to trying for longer-term relationships as well though?
Yes, work and life should be completely separated in my opinion never mix up your personal life with your job.
You work to get a paycheck and go home it's not a singles dating or hooking up environment there are plenty of other places other than work you can find someone .
There are always exceptions but realize it does come with risk as losing your job is always a risk doing this
because people gossip about you and how you are dating Stacy and last night he was either too over cocky or clingy or whatever reason that starts rumor in your office or trade job or customer.
If you still want to do it go for it, but I don't recommend it due to the risk of losing your job.
Thanks for your helpful advice Just curious, do you have any additional advice or thoughts on your suggestion above, about how to go about asking her to meet for lunch or something similar, so that it also stays sufficiently low-key and doesn't sound too overly strong in terms of the actual request, if I was going to try to consider that option?
How much have you actually spoken to and interacted with her?
Obviously if your interaction has been minimal, then asking her to lunch would not seem low key. But you can spend months tracking and analyzing every little glance and gesture.
At some point, you have to interact with her in a decidedly more intimate, meaning personal, way. It's easier to do if you are talking about something like a restaurant or a type of food and then you can just say, "I'm going to the new taco place for lunch today. Wanna come with me and try it?"
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Just curious, do you have any additional advice or thoughts on your suggestion above, about how to go about asking her to meet for lunch or something similar, so that it also stays sufficiently low-key and doesn't sound too overly strong in terms of the actual request, if I was going to try to consider that option?
