I was Catfished, WTF is wrong with people? (sociopaths, guys, single)
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Wait you call me crazy, but you will waste an hour on a phone call with a telemarketer just to be a dick?!
You sound just like him, and that's pretty sad. I don't understand why people **** with people's heads like that. Shows that person is unstable IMO.
They are using an auto-dialer to call me on a cell phone, which is illegal to do so. So yeah, I'll dick with them, and record the call to submit it to the FCC. I have zero sympathy for scams like that nor the people working for them.
So you think it's ok and normal for someone to **** with someone's emotions for weeks, because they are bored and want entertainment? That's pretty sick.
Never said it was OK or normal. Just said that sounds like what happened. Frankly, he sounds like my ex.
The internet + humans sucking = Potential for just about anything
Sorry, but anyone who makes any assumption about a relationship born in cyberspace but has yet to have even one physical meeting is totally naive.
I'm not saying all people are bad (but most), but there's enough true information gathered for years about how the internet is an easy breeding ground for bad people. It's hard enough trusting a relationship with a person you have only met and known in person. The internet adds a whole new layer of sh*t.
Regardless of having weeks/months/whatever time meeting a person online, unless you've had real dates/get togethers at least a few times, the relationship is still a blank.
You clearly were emotionally invested enough to cause you to create a post on a message board about it. That itself says a lot. And his BS about you being the best thing that happened to him and he would move to Chicago? You "met" the guy online less than 3 weeks ago. That immediately screams a huge red flag. You don't base your life decisions on someone you've never met in person and only been talking to online for 3 weeks.
Did you even talk to him on the phone, or was it all digital text/email?
We talked on the phone once. You don't think I saw him saying that stuff as red flags either?! I had been suspicious from early on, but like any "relationship" you are tying to build or understand you have to investigate the person more and more. By week 3 the lies and the lovey dovey stuff had me convinced he wasn't real.
Listen it's not like I have had this epiphany since Sunday, I have been suspecting it for a while, but you also have to build a case first too. So stop acting like I am acting as I am all heartbroken and shocked. I am not, I am fine. My point again is I am just surprised people do things like that. That's all I am saying!
Also, I am pretty sure there is a lot more going in the gay community in Chicago than in Madison. Chicago has a gay population of over 100k (10 Cities with a Large Population of Gays | Futurescopes.com). The ENTIRE city of Madison has only a overall population of 300k. So you are a fool if you think there is more going on for the LGBT people in Madison than in Chicago, I mean really foolish. Chicago's gay population would be 1/3 of Madison's overall city population. The gay capital of the Midwest is Chicago, by and far.
You figured out what was going on simply by paying attention. The problem here is that you didn't act on what you learned as quickly as you should have. The next time you discover major discrepancies in stories you're told, cut the person loose, stat. Don't continue to invest hours of time.
You fell for some virtual guy who you've never met. Sounds pretty crazy to me.
Next time, meet the guy in real life before investing emotions.
Exactly this!
Instead of building this picture of how great this man is in your mind, meet them in person sooner rather than later! As it will save disappointments and heartache
You figured out what was going on simply by paying attention. The problem here is that you didn't act on what you learned as quickly as you should have. The next time you discover major discrepancies in stories you're told, cut the person loose, stat. Don't continue to invest hours of time.
Yup you are totally right! I learned my lesson. I really should have confronted him once I saw the first lie and inconsistencies. I think what I was trying to do was when confronting put him in a corner by giving him a list of everything he lied about and the proof. What ended up happening was I was just wasting my time. I tried doing a reverse Google image search with the pics he sent me, as I was hoping I could track down the real person and let them know that someone was using his pics.
I think it's pretty apparent this person was a catfish and just using me for attention or to feel better about themselves. I highly doubt someone that good looking, would waste their time chatting with me for weeks, just out of boredom or for their personal entertainment.
I'm sorry that happened. I think some people have these little fantasy lives they live, such a being a handsome Portuguese MMA fighter from a big family and recruited by Google. It's probably a thousand percent more interesting and attractive than his real life. If you've never spoken to him on the phone, Mateo could have been a woman. I belong to an online group and we got a new member, "Sarah," who soon recruited a couple of friends. They'd have conversations on our message board: Hey Sarah, how's it going? Girl I have a hot date tonight. That's great, what's he like? The three of them talked to one another a lot. Then Sarah found out she had cancer, people were concerned ... then oh no, "Danielle" was getting a divorce from her abusive ex. Lots of attention, lots of sympathy, lots of conversation among the three of them and with others. Then oops, Sarah messed up her logins and started posting her Sarah-stories as Danielle. They were all the same person. No reason to believe any of it was true. Sarah and her imaginary friends, obviously, disappeared from the group. What's extra weird is that most of us chat (actual talking, not SMS messages), but Sarah never accepted chat invites so none of us ever heard her voice. She was probably a guy.
We talked on the phone once. You don't think I saw him saying that stuff as red flags either?! I had been suspicious from early on, but like any "relationship" you are tying to build or understand you have to investigate the person more and more. By week 3 the lies and the lovey dovey stuff had me convinced he wasn't real.
Listen it's not like I have had this epiphany since Sunday, I have been suspecting it for a while, but you also have to build a case first too. So stop acting like I am acting as I am all heartbroken and shocked. I am not, I am fine. My point again is I am just surprised people do things like that. That's all I am saying!
Also, I am pretty sure there is a lot more going in the gay community in Chicago than in Madison. Chicago has a gay population of over 100k (10 Cities with a Large Population of Gays | Futurescopes.com). The ENTIRE city of Madison has only a overall population of 300k. So you are a fool if you think there is more going on for the LGBT people in Madison than in Chicago, I mean really foolish. Chicago's gay population would be 1/3 of Madison's overall city population. The gay capital of the Midwest is Chicago, by and far.
Contradictory statement. You said you are surprised people do things, yet you said you're not shocked.
You had one phone call with him and the rest through texting. Texting or any digital type allows for the user to think things through and manipulate more. Phone/in-person/skype is live. Real time. Hard to BS that way.
And for sure there's a larger gay community in Chicago than Madison, as you said, it's a much larger city. But it's not like Madison is some po-dunk redneck town. I'm not the first to understand gay relationships (because, from an outsider who has a handful of gay friends, it always seems like they are in and out of relationships, much more than my straight friends), but it's suspicious he'd be that interested in someone 2-3 hours away when there's plenty of options near him right there.
Honestly, chalk it up to a learning experience and move on. Block him, don't answer his emails, put it behind you. There's ****ty people out there and there's great people out there. Unfortunately, it seems like a higher proportion of people online hail from the ****ty realm.
Instead of building this picture of how great this man is in your mind, meet them in person sooner rather than later! As it will save disappointments and heartache
Yeah, I know I am learning. I actually am in the process of coming out, already came out to a few people. So the online dating for me is pretty new when it comes to guys, and sometimes I get too excited, but sometimes it's the best way to learn, when things like this happen.
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