would this be a dealbreaker? (wife, boyfriend, marriage, girl)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Maybe I'm just not getting it, but how is that your business? Yes, couples should be honest with each other but really, this has nothing to do with you unless it was your baby. Anyway, when you begin dating someone you should be honest about whether or not you have any STDs, drug dependancies, criminal history etc. Those are things that a person should know because the consequences could come back and haunt you. However, an abortion is private. I don't know anyone who made that decision lightly. Since you are clearly a pro lifer and she's obviously pro choice, the bigger issue is whether or not you can be with someone who doesn't share all of your views. If not, then you may need to find someone at the next pro life meeting. That's not to be harsh but that's pretty much the only place you're guaranteed to find a woman who's never had one. But really, are you that judgemental? What if she picked your past apart, what would she find? Instead of focusing on her past, focus on who she is today. We've all made mistakes.
this is a purely hypothetical question. It's not my personal situation, just trying to get some opinions on the matter
Well, then you should try asking the same question in the religion, and political forums. If you plan to participate in the threads though, I suggest buying yourself a back-up keyboard. Trust me, you'll need it!
this is a purely hypothetical question. It's not my personal situation, just trying to get some opinions on the matter
It's not your personal situation, but you made your take on the matter very clear.
What I think, many other people stated.
I am not going to go all into the womans right deal.
I do, however feel it is part of her past, 'hypothetically' and in due time, the woman would most likely share it with you.
Go out on a first date and say, BTW, about ten years ago, I had an abortion, is this date dutch now?
Who knows why, hypothetically, this may have had to happen. But as she loves and trusts you, and feels she can tell you, she probably will. For whatever reason it may have happened.
Now, should one judge another? I don't think so. Who are we in this huge world to judge? Who is the one that may judge? Who is the one that will judge, when it is all said and done, and who is the one that will forgive us all of our trespasses?
Not you, not any person on this earth. Not anyone. And not any one person is given that right.
Oh sure, they take it, and make it their own, every day, but they shouldn't
Not one of us here is perfect, nor our lives.
We take each step, one right after the other, each day the same.
We are people. Just that.. people.
So, hypothetically, you are with a woman, you have fallen in love with her. She- with you. She now feels she can tell you anything, and you will not judge her, but only love her.
She tells you that when she was younger she had to have an abortion for whichever reason.
And you... you turn on her, the cold shoulder. Like you never cared, like you never loved her at all.
I think that for her... that would be the deal breaker... not for you.. hypothetically speaking, that is..
just sayin
Last edited by Pikantari; 02-10-2008 at 07:17 AM..
Reason: fingers moving too fast here!
Location: Life here is not an Apollo Mission. Everyone calm down.
1,065 posts, read 4,535,524 times
Reputation: 999
Not a deal breaker.
You don't know; neither do you have the right, to the painful emotions that are behind that sort of decision. I have never had an abortion, but my miscarriage resulted in the same procedure as a clinical abortion. It was violent, painful, and a nightmare, and not something I would share with someone I was seeing. I've always thought it was similar to rape or molestation.
We all have past traumas and it takes a lot of strength to not live today with the same emotions of the past. It is a private matter.
Just make sure you pick up women at pro-life rallies. That way you won't have to worry about it.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
