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Old 02-12-2008, 10:00 AM
 
Location: Kentucky Bluegrass
28,883 posts, read 30,132,067 times
Reputation: 19057

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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Stud View Post
You can't cheat on the internet -- it's impossible. Now, if you meet someone off the internet and have intercourse, that would be considered cheating. But words, pictures, cybersex, blah blah, it means nothing.

HAH, That is a matter of opinion..and someone who feels as you do, has not only very little respect for himself, but for the hearts of others as well...

I know a lot of men in this forum would agree, you get bored with your wife, so you go on the internet and act out a fantasy...no thanks....who are we kidding here? Your contaminating the relationship and effecting others in a negative way by your thoughts and actions.

All your doing is making excuses for infidelity and selfishness....and it doesn't cut any ice. It's wrong, period....and opens the door to a whole lot of other questions....we're human beings here, not dogs in heat.

Last edited by cremebrulee; 02-12-2008 at 10:24 AM..
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:09 AM
 
6,565 posts, read 14,263,201 times
Reputation: 3229
Quote:
Originally Posted by cremebrulee View Post
HAH, That is a matter of opinion..

Ummm, wouldn't THIS be stating YOUR opinion as fact???


Quote:
Originally Posted by cremebrulee
All your doing is making excuses for infidelity and selfishness....and it doesn't cut any ice. It's wrong, period....and opens the door to a whole lot of other questions....we're human beings here, not dogs in heat.
If it's a matter of opinion then we should all treat it as such....

The internet is a relatively new outlet and is a judgement call at this point that will never be settled on as DEFINATELY cheating or DEFINATELY not cheating.....

It's like Strip Clubs..... Some people think it's cheating for a man to enter one. Some think it's cheating to watch. Some think it's cheating to buy a dance. Some think it's not cheating at all.

So why is the internet suddenly so concrete???
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Old 02-12-2008, 12:14 PM
 
Location: Zebulon, NC
2,275 posts, read 6,294,177 times
Reputation: 3622
BornInMeLivnInExile, I think the best thing you can do at this point is to stop reading the internet, and get you and your husband into counseling. You need someone with an objective point of view, who will hear both sides of the story. At this point you're getting opinions based on personal experiences, mixed in with a little flaming - none of which have anything to do with you and your husband.
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Old 02-12-2008, 02:29 PM
 
Location: Kentucky Bluegrass
28,883 posts, read 30,132,067 times
Reputation: 19057
Quote:
Originally Posted by BeerNPoker View Post
Ummm, wouldn't THIS be stating YOUR opinion as fact???




If it's a matter of opinion then we should all treat it as such....

The internet is a relatively new outlet and is a judgement call at this point that will never be settled on as DEFINATELY cheating or DEFINATELY not cheating.....

It's like Strip Clubs..... Some people think it's cheating for a man to enter one. Some think it's cheating to watch. Some think it's cheating to buy a dance. Some think it's not cheating at all.

So why is the internet suddenly so concrete???
I suppose it is a matter of morals, how you morally feel, which I might add, the poster and her hubby might not be compatible...and I agree, strickly a matter of opinions...

I agree with the Claire F who suggested that these two should go into counseling and get an objective opinion, might be a healthy new start for both of them. And I apologize for taking your comment so personal...

In the meantime, thank you for yours.

Creme
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Old 02-12-2008, 02:40 PM
 
21,951 posts, read 19,073,567 times
Reputation: 18067
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Stud View Post
Men get bored of their wives and need some kind of release, unless you have a good woman who treats you right.
And the chances of having a "good woman who treats you right" in your life go up dramatically, if you actually give her gifts on, say, Valentine's Day, instead of saying gifts are a waste of time because "then she'll come to expect them."
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Old 02-12-2008, 02:45 PM
 
21,951 posts, read 19,073,567 times
Reputation: 18067
Quote:
Originally Posted by mishigas73 View Post
I get this visceral, "icky" reaction when I see married men looking for some on the net. you're no better than pond scum, as far as I'm concerned.

I met my bf of 2 years in a chat room. Interestingly, when we first started chatting we were both involved with others. Then, circumstances changed for the both of us, and we got together. We both still prowl those chatrooms. But, to this day, I see married people (men especially) come around pretty late and you just KNOW that wifey-poo is asleep. Bugs the $*(%*#)@ out of me.
LOL....so it bugs you that married people visit in chat rooms and they are thus pond scum....but that's how you and your boyfriend got together, meeting in a chat room when you were BOTH with other people??!!!

OMG what a double standard!
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Old 02-12-2008, 02:56 PM
 
6,304 posts, read 8,984,627 times
Reputation: 8149
Quote:
Originally Posted by DimSumRaja View Post
LOL....so it bugs you that married people visit in chat rooms and they are thus pond scum....but that's how you and your boyfriend got together, meeting in a chat room when you were BOTH with other people??!!!

OMG what a double standard!
Actually, not. Because, as it turned out, both of our SO's at the time didn't have any issues with us doing this.

Maybe I should have been more specific on this. It's married people who come onto the site behind their partner's back that bug me. If it's something that's accepted (which, I don't think is very many cases), more power to them. But, if it's not, then they don't get a warm reception from me.

Oh yes, and for the record, there was absolutely nothing serious going on between my bf and I prior to the time that we were both available.
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Old 02-12-2008, 09:51 PM
 
Location: Fort Worth, Texas
10,757 posts, read 35,362,252 times
Reputation: 6959
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Stud/Stacy/Ditto View Post
Thanks for your opinion, son. Keep reading my posts and you'll learn about life and how things work.

The Stud has spoken.

P.S. I'm so put out that I lack enough originality that people are figuring out that I am Stacy AND Ditto.
I feel so relieved to have your wisdom as a part of my life, its been edifying in a way I can't describe.
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Old 02-12-2008, 09:55 PM
 
Location: southern california
61,289 posts, read 87,183,030 times
Reputation: 55551
liars cheat,
cheaters lie
its not a 1 shot deal.
its when you are willing to pay
absolutely any price for what
you want, that satan comes knockin.
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Old 02-12-2008, 10:20 PM
 
2,141 posts, read 7,850,209 times
Reputation: 1273
People have different capacities for forgiveness. Trust can be earned back in time. You experienced a pretty rough patch in your marriage. Some of us would be able to move forward, get help and at least make a strong effort to try to save the marriage. Others could not forgive and ever trust our spouse again. If i've invested a lot of time in someone, still loved them and can make some sense of their actions, I'd be inclined to give them a 2nd chance.
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