Trying to figure out what she wants? (women, American, calling)
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So there's a girl who works in my building (different floors and rarely have anything to do with each other business wise), she was a bit flirty with me so asked her out for coffee which we had together. She invited me out for drinks with her friends but I had to decline, suggested another time for just us two which she agreed. Anyway the time came for that and she flaked. I took that as a sign she's not interested and went no contact on her.
The thing is she still tries to talk to me pretty much every other day, even if I give her not so enthusiastic answers and leave it she'll still contact me a few days later and try talking to me. Even inviting me out again for a drink (but with incredibly short notice so I couldn't make it).
So on one hand I don't think she's interested as she seems hot/cold, and she calls me 'man' and 'bud' (thinking friendzone territory).
Then she sends mixed signals like this I don't know what to think?
I wouldn't jump at the first opportunity to be with her. If you hang out with her again, don't get clingy. Let her do most of the talking; just observe and listen. In a short time, you should be able to determine if she's friend-zoned you or not.
People give up so quickly! Are you afraid of looking silly? You don't give the details of her flaking but if you're still wondering about her maybe if makes sense to see what she's thinking - she's certainly not avoiding her. And if you didn't care you wouldn't be asking US. Maybe you're both just too immature so you make half-hearted attempts that make it difficult for the other to meet, and then are overly sensitive when it doesn't work out. Like "hey, I tried but they didn't whatever so it's all on them now."
She wants you to be interested in her so be interested in her but don't ask her out and make excuses when when she asks you out. Bide your time until a real opportunity to be together happens. Patience is a virtue.
People give up so quickly! Are you afraid of looking silly? You don't give the details of her flaking but if you're still wondering about her maybe if makes sense to see what she's thinking - she's certainly not avoiding her. And if you didn't care you wouldn't be asking US. Maybe you're both just too immature so you make half-hearted attempts that make it difficult for the other to meet, and then are overly sensitive when it doesn't work out. Like "hey, I tried but they didn't whatever so it's all on them now."
I asked her over messanger about the drinks we talked about (just her and I), and she just didn't even answer just avoided the question.
So there's a girl who works in my building (different floors and rarely have anything to do with each other business wise), she was a bit flirty with me so asked her out for coffee which we had together. She invited me out for drinks with her friends but I had to decline, suggested another time for just us two which she agreed. Anyway the time came for that and she flaked. I took that as a sign she's not interested and went no contact on her.
The thing is she still tries to talk to me pretty much every other day, even if I give her not so enthusiastic answers and leave it she'll still contact me a few days later and try talking to me. Even inviting me out again for a drink (but with incredibly short notice so I couldn't make it).
So on one hand I don't think she's interested as she seems hot/cold, and she calls me 'man' and 'bud' (thinking friendzone territory).
Then she sends mixed signals like this I don't know what to think?
do you enjoy giving up so quickly? with some women you have to bide your time, and take it slow. its possible that she was playing tit for tat you blew off her drink invite, so she blew off yours. doesnt matter the reason.
so best to keep it simple, coffee, the lunch. that way you two can continue to connect in person in relaxed atmosphere.
also when you are talking to her, dont just volunteer information about you, make her earn it. she asks you a question be a bit vague with the answer so she has to work for the information she wants. she is doing the same to you by the way, its all part of the game.
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