Does being flaky/wishy washy cause for immediate dismissal in dating? (women, love)

[MissmamaAnnie]

I recently had a guy who flaked on me when we made plans to hang out. We made plans to meet up when he gets off work at 3pm but I didn't hear from him until 9pm -he just said sorry something came up. I let it slide then he suggested plans to get together again but No time/location had been set, then incidentally falls silent on the big day again for the second time.No text, no call...just silence. I decided to just drop this one


Having said that ,based on my experience,when a guy demonstrates flakiness in the early stages of dating -it doesn't get better with time

I can understand if the person calls beforehand to reschedule or afterward to explain the bizarre emergency situation in which he was unable to call, text, email, Facebook message or send smoke signals.Other than I'm going to start writing a guy off the first time they pull the no call no show without a valid reason..Any one encounter flalky girls or guys?How do you have tolerance of it?

[stan4]

Yup.

I can't stand people like that as friends let alone significant others.

[Londoncowboy30]

Sorry to hear that Annie ,

I'm the same as you, if there is a genuine reason they can't make it then sweet we will do it again if there's not then bye bye .

Personally I'd much rather get screamed at over the phone or face to face and tell them I'm not interested than keep them hanging or in the dark. It all comes down to manners and I can't stomach anyone without them.

I think your stance is the right one, if for any reason you get a bad vibe then don't pursue. Granted one may have genuine reasons for not making the date and you will miss out but most that leave it last minute to cancel and without much thought for you will not so you'll save yourself a lot of time and heartache.

Take care

[HabsFanMTL88]

Absolutely. Goes for men and women alike. People who are truly interested don't flake.

[Stymie13]

Yes

[Katnan]

Being flaky and/or wishy-washy is not putting your best foot forward. It's also pretty hard to get over a bad first impression, so why invest any time in someone so inconsiderate.

[Bluesmama]

People who are flaky are either non-committal types or can't manage their time or stick to a plan, and it is very frustrating to their friends and loved ones. If you can't deal with this type of person then take it as a Red Flag for yourself. You are correct in that it will not improve.

[JerZ]

Err not only did he not go through with the first date but he didn't even "cancel," if you can call it that by then, until hours LATER? There would have been no second chance. Period. Seriously, you were willing to still try for a date after that? Why?

[Gabriella Geramia]

Wow, I'm actually going through the same thing. Last week me and this guy were going to go out on Sunday but he said it was too far away so I said I could make time the next day. But I didn't hear from him at all the next day. The following day he said some family stuff came up. So I said ok, later this week then? I didn't make definite plans either, I just said today or tomorrow. But I didn't hear from him for a whole day until today. I was going to just block him but I think I'll just let his message sit and not respond. Or if he responds back to hang out tomorrow, I'll respond the day after and said something came up. I should probably be more mature about this and should have blocked him after the first time but the funny thing is, I'm not even mad. I don't really care all that much but I'm quite turned off at this point.

[49ersfan27]

Absolutely. Men and women who flake on a person don't deserve a second chance.