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Old 04-01-2016, 12:56 PM
 
7,237 posts, read 12,653,519 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve View Post
A year is nothing. You don't know each other well enough yet.


Tell her what you told us .... and better use a condom ...
A year old relationship is one thing, but say that it's too soon to talk about marriage and kids is entirely another thing. And we are talking about a 33yo woman who wants kids and marriage, personally I think it's fair for her to find out whether she's on the same page as the guy she's dating.

The least the OP can do is give her a time frame as to when he's willing to talk about the marriage/kids issue. She can decide then whether to continue the relationship. I just hope the OP isn't jerking her around and wasting her time.
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Old 04-01-2016, 01:01 PM
 
6,908 posts, read 3,743,709 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by timberline742 View Post
I've wanted to marry two women in my life, that sure didn't happen as fast as a year! That isn't much time, especially for people so young.
When Inasked that question, I was told at my age, it should be known by 6 months where the relationship is going.
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Old 04-01-2016, 01:06 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck View Post
When Inasked that question, I was told at my age, it should be known by 6 months where the relationship is going.
I don't know any serious couple who hasn't at least discussed it by this point or aren't already living together-or if they aren't they might as well be. Maybe we just do things faster out here? Or maybe that's the difference between finding "the one" and knowing deep down the person you are with is Mr./Ms. "Right Now." Who knows - this is just my experience for myself and the people in my life, for the most part. As with everything, there is the rare exception.
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Old 04-01-2016, 01:06 PM
 
Location: Queens, NY
3,746 posts, read 1,997,916 times
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She's 33, not 23. Makes sense for her to want to get married and have kids as soon as possible.

If you really don't want to have kids (at least not right now), then definitely break it off with her.
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Old 04-01-2016, 01:07 PM
 
32,730 posts, read 22,687,383 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NWGirl74 View Post
I don't know any serious couple who hasn't at least discussed it by this point or aren't already living together-or if they aren't they might as well be. Maybe we just do things faster out here? Or maybe that's the difference between finding "the one" and knowing deep down the person you are with is Mr./Ms. "Right Now." Who knows - this is just my experience for myself and the people in my life.
They've moved in at 6 mos? That's something I did in my 20s, and have seen other kids do, but never an adult.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NewYorker11356 View Post
She's 33, not 23. Makes sense for her to want to get married and have kids as soon as possible.

If you really don't want to have kids (at least not right now), then definitely break it off with her.
33 is still pretty darn young, I don't even know five women that have had kids that young.

But he should break it off because he doesn't trust her.
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Old 04-01-2016, 01:12 PM
 
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Originally Posted by timberline742 View Post
They've moved in at 6 mos? That's something I did in my 20s, and have seen other kids do, but never an adult.
Yep. I moved in with LH at 4 months. At 3 months, my best friend asked if we were moving in together. We'd never even talked about it and agreed to discuss it at 6 months. A month later, it just naturally happened. Now, I was 26 at the time and he was 33 and I think "damn! that was fast!" and I'd never do it again, but if I met the right person, I cannot say with absolute certainty I wouldn't do it again. And I'm in no rush to tie the knot and babies are pretty much off the table at this point!
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Old 04-01-2016, 01:14 PM
 
32,730 posts, read 22,687,383 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NWGirl74 View Post
Yep. I moved in with LH at 4 months. At 3 months, my best friend asked if we were moving in together. We'd never even talked about it and agreed to discuss it at 6 months. A month later, it just naturally happened. Now, I was 26 at the time and he was 33 and I think "damn! that was fast!" and I'd never do it again, but if I met the right person, I cannot say with absolute certainty I wouldn't do it again. And I'm in no rush to tie the knot and babies are pretty much off the table at this point!
Well yeah, you were 26! That's what I'm saying. It's something youngins do. I did it at 28. I was a young dumb kid.
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Old 04-01-2016, 01:16 PM
 
4,380 posts, read 3,430,051 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by timberline742 View Post
Well yeah, you were 26! That's what I'm saying. It's something youngins do. I did it at 28. I was a young dumb kid.
My best friend met, moved in and married her husband all within 8 months, at the age of 38. Just because it's not something you would do or see in your circle, does not mean it doesn't happen in other circles.
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Old 04-01-2016, 01:22 PM
 
32,730 posts, read 22,687,383 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NWGirl74 View Post
My best friend met, moved in and married her husband all within 8 months, at the age of 38. Just because it's not something you would do or see in your circle, does not mean it doesn't happen in other circles.
Lots of crazy things happen in lots of places. People mail order brides, women that see themselves as second class citizens and want to be subservient to their men, polygamous communes, arranged marriages, etc. Just because it happens, and occasionally works, doesn't mean it is sane or advisable.
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Old 04-01-2016, 01:23 PM
 
321 posts, read 150,328 times
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Sometimes I think about marriage (again) and kids etc but it's complicated..I think, get married again and have kids and my soon to be wife dumps me, divorces me and i'll be slave of child support for 18 to 23 years? Its complicated friends!
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