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Yeah, it's a great tool to use to see if you have anything in common and I can also usually tell if the person has a great sense of humor, etc. BUT, when you start texting someone all through the day before you even meet and then that drops off after meeting, it creates all kinds of anxiety! I started chatting to a guy over the weekend who was on POF, we swapped phone numbers, he was texting me over the weekend, telling me goodnight, and texting good morning, etc. So, we met last night after work for a drink, spent 3 hours talking and finally went home, he had dogs to let out and I have a daughter at home, but we were very much enjoying talking to each other. I sent him a short text when I got home, thanks again for the drinks, it was nice meeting you. He replied, nice meeting you too. Not a word this morning! Now do I need good morning texts?? Hell no!! But since he started that and then hasn't communicated with me at all today, of course I'm thinking "he doesn't want to see me again"... ugh...
I commented on this the other day in that I feel the problem with texting is that once a person establishes a pattern, as soon as that's broken, the other person automatically thinks there is something wrong, they are "over" etc, when there could be 1,000 reasons for not receiving a text that have absolutely nothing to do with them. Sick child, sick dog, dead phone, running late, early meeting, food poisoning, not wanting to look too eager, headache, allergies from hell, IRS audit...just to name a few.
(I'm just as guilty as the next person of this, FWIW).
I know! He's a physician so I know he has a very demanding job and crazy hours, BUT he was texting me between surgeries yesterday, and nothing at all this morning, ugh! I hate anxiety lol!
I never got into texting because, to this day, I still only rock flip phones and texting on those things is a royal pain. I have friends that are single and looking, and doing the texting thing and I just have to shake my head. I agree, he probably is not that into you... but maybe he is and thinks he has to play it cool. Frustrating, isn't it. I'm just saying... I would have taken care of the dogs before I left home... you could have said "take care of your dogs and then come take care of me...". If you felt that way about him, of course. But regardless of how you choose to handle FDS in the future... wait a minute... did he know before you met that you had a daughter at home? Anyway, definitely set the texting tone early. Only return those texts you want to, and shut down over-eager early over-communicators with some polite words to the effect of you want to see what they are working with before you invest emotionally in voice or text communication.
We met straight after work, in the town we both work in. He lives 30 min away and I live 45 min away, so not really feasible to go home first. He seemed eager during the day, texting me his status and how much longer he thought he'd have to work, etc. Then not a peep today...
I know! He's a physician so I know he has a very demanding job and crazy hours, BUT he was texting me between surgeries yesterday, and nothing at all this morning, ugh! I hate anxiety lol!
Surgery this morning that maybe is taking longer than expected?
Oh, but don't you know, it's the "rule" he has to wait 3 days before contacting you again after the first date.
We met straight after work, in the town we both work in. He lives 30 min away and I live 45 min away, so not really feasible to go home first. He seemed eager during the day, texting me his status and how much longer he thought he'd have to work, etc. Then not a peep today...
There's no way any of us can really know what's going on, but maybe:
...he likes the thrill of the chase; after the date was a done deal it wasn't exciting anymore.
...he was expecting the kitty and was insulted that that didn't happen.
...he's just busy.
...he's a horrid communicator and thinks he's supposed to show a lot of interest in order to get the date, and then afterward, all that isn't necessary anymore.
...his phone died.
...he discovered during the course of the actual date that he just wasn't feeling it.
Or maybe something else.
Only one thing is sure: his communication style and yours don't jibe. I wouldn't be hanging my star on this one just yet. I'd be thinking of it as a fun date, a fun experience but not something to be picking out china patterns or bedding over. I'd still have my eyes open. Anything could happen from here, don't take one date too seriously.
LOL, he just texted...I should KNOW someone with his job has a very unpredictable schedule...
Some days I think I'd prefer living in the days when ladies sat wringing their hankies waiting on their gentleman caller to show up...
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Anything could happen from here, don't take one date too seriously.
