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I have been with my boyfriend for two years and while he is great and attentive when he is not playing when he does he gets hooked for days, even weeks! He has also specifically taken days off when a new game comes out.
I really am tired of him playing his stupid games! I have told him and he says it's not bad because while he plays compulsively when he first gets it he puts the game away when he's finished and does everything he needs to do. Admittedly he hasn't missed any big events such as my birthday or Christmas or anything except for work he takes off beforehand I still think he should stop when I need or want something.
And while not as big an issue I am disturbed by the kinds of games he plays. Shooting games with lots of blood and guts, games where the women are very sexualized etc. He makes good money but spends a lot of it on gaming stuff. Which isn't all bad for example for my last birthday he presented me a high end computer he built for me, even got a pink case for it. He can be very sweet and thoughtful I just wish he didn't play as much. I asked him to please only play on the weekends and if we aren't doing anything of course but he said I was being selfish and unreasonable and even said that he does everything that is needed and still goes to important events and go on dates so he should be able to play when he wants.
I just don't know what to think. Please would love advice!
But is my request to only play on the weekends reasonable? I know he often will go to bed with me then when I fall asleep he will get up to play his games.
He recently imported a new sexist game that is a volleyball game but you play as sexy women wearing next to nothing. I have told him I don't want him to play it when I am around.
You can do better than this guy, OP. Even being on your own would be better than being with a guy who views his games as more important than you, or even more important than his job.
Look for someone who's into you. He's not that into you.
Wow, guess I am in the minority then. How is what he doing showing he cares more about video games than his girlfriend? As she herself stated while he can get really into games he obviously still works and does all of his obligations and is nice and caring to his gf, even going so far as to build her a high end PC which is NOT cheap; even customizing the case to her liking.
As for the taking off work for games, assuming this is something he can afford to do and he doesn't have to worry about getting fired for it what is the issue? I have known plenty of people that have taken off work for sports games, for music concerts, for a wide variety of entertainment reasons, were they in the wrong as well? Heck, my gf has taken days off just to go shopping when there are sales and played farmville for several hours at a time for weeks.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
You can do better than this guy, OP. Even being on your own would be better than being with a guy who views his games as more important than you, or even more important than his job.
Look for someone who's into you. He's not that into you.
Wow, guess I am in the minority then. How is what he doing showing he cares more about video games than his girlfriend? As she herself stated while he can get really into games he obviously still works and does all of his obligations and is nice and caring to his gf, even going so far as to build her a high end PC which is NOT cheap; even customizing the case to her liking.
As for the taking off work for games, assuming this is something he can afford to do and he doesn't have to worry about getting fired for it what is the issue? I have known plenty of people that have taken off work for sports games, for music concerts, for a wide variety of entertainment reasons, were they in the wrong as well? Heck, my gf has taken days off just to go shopping when there are sales and played farmville for several hours at a time for weeks.
See above.
And he plays sexualized games as if she weren't there, he admits to being compulsive about his playing, and takes days off work to indulge his compulsion. People who go to ball games on a special day off aren't playing ball every day at home until late in the night. It's a special treat.
Like an alcoholic, he claims he can put it down anytime and walk away from it to get other stuff done. He gets up at night after she's fallen asleep to play some more. They don't have much couple time, and he's been unwilling to agree to her compromise of limiting his gaming to weekends, or in some way making time for them to do stuff together.
This isn't going to get any better. In any case, she's not happy with it, so at the very least, they're not compatible.
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