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She contacted you first which means that she has some interest.
She put the ball in your court. It is up to you to man up and figure out how you want to exchange phone numbers.
There's almost a part of me at the moment that doesn't want her to say yes since it's making me worried about how the date would go especially since she's an older woman while I have pretty much no experience.
Us old fogies are pretty much just people too. And for the most part, we don't bite. At least not in public and definitely not if you aren't into that type of thing.
She contacted you first which means that she has some interest.
She put the ball in your court. It is up to you to man up and figure out how you want to exchange phone numbers.
Well, I asked her earlier today about 3 hours ago. Still no reply yet. And she did message me first on the app & still has been responding ever since so I take it there's at the very least some sort of interest in some way. I'm just unsure of what type of interest it is.
Us old fogies are pretty much just people too. And for the most part, we don't bite. At least not in public and definitely not if you aren't into that type of thing.
I'm just nervous about what she would say when I tell her I have no dating experience at an older age. Feel her interest would definitely go down automatically. She would likely want a guy with experience at her age even if it's just for something casual/short term.
I did OLD off and on until I started dating my husband at 42. I had little patience for it and did not use the app, just the desktop site. I wasn't into it enough to feel the need to take it with me wherever I went. I also didn't spend a lot of time on it and wouldn't have any interest in exchanging messages for days or weeks on end. Women in their 30s and 40s have busy lives. Not to mention, I believe ALL women get a LOT of messages on OLD. It would not stand out to me if someone just messaged back and forth and did not make any effort to move past those messages. There is nothing more attractive than a guy who says "would you like to meet for a drink on Friday?" or some variation of that -- specific day, specific suggestion. If it feels like pulling teeth, I'm over it.
Typically I only exchanged numbers for the "if anything comes up" scenario after the meet had been scheduled, and had no patience for texting with someone I'd never met.
Last edited by CapsChick; 06-07-2016 at 12:06 PM..
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jersey4Life
I'm just nervous about what she would say when I tell her I have no dating experience at an older age.
Why would you tell her this? Jesus, just go have fun. This is simple stuff.
Some people respond immediately, some don't, it may indicate interest, it may not. Stop overthinking and live. People are just making the simplest things difficult.
I did OLD off and on until I started dating my husband at 42. I had little patience for it and did not use the app, just the desktop site. I wasn't into it enough to feel the need to take it with me wherever I went. I also didn't spend a lot of time on it and wouldn't have any interest in exchanging messages for days or weeks on end. Women int heir 30s and 40s have busy lives. Not to mention, I believe ALL women get a LOT of messages on OLD. It would not stand out to me if someone just messaged back and forth and did not make any effort to move past those messages. There is nothing more attractive than a guy who says "would you like to meet for a drink on Friday?" or some variation of that -- specific day, specific suggestion. If it feels like pulling teeth, I'm over it.
Typically I only exchanged numbers for the "if anything comes up" scenario after the meet had been scheduled, and had no patience for texting with someone I'd never met.
That's another possibility that she just wants me to take action already for why she keeps actually replying even after I supposedly screwed up in so many ways according to a bunch of people on here. Maybe she's giving me more of a chance since she likes talking to me? I have to just stop overthinking everything thoguh but when I have hardly any experience with this it's hard not to.
Why would you tell her this? Jesus, just go have fun. This is simple stuff.
Some people respond immediately, some don't, it may indicate interest, it may not. Stop overthinking and live. People are just making the simplest things difficult.
I didn't tell her that. But if the topic comes up if we met or through texting what am I supposed to say? I wouldn't want to lie to her.
Not to mention, I believe ALL women get a LOT of messages on OLD.
Not all of us. I get very few. I was just asking one of my friends how Match is going for her since she joined a few weeks ago and she said it's not going well because she hasn't been proactive in sending out messages and is hoping to have more time in a couple of weeks to start sending them out (once school is out). She does have a date tonight from OKC but she said she's not getting a lot of messages there either and the quality of men has gone down considerably from when she was on last summer.
Another friend is taking a break from POF because she got tired of having to initiate the majority of the contact with no response - if she initiated contact, whether it was a wink, message, or what not, out of 100 guys, she'd maybe start a dialog with two of them.
Based on what I'm hearing from my friends and what's being reported in a single's FB group I belong to, I'm really starting to wonder if the OLD scene is dead here - even my guy friends are complaining about it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jersey4Life
I'm just nervous about what she would say when I tell her I have no dating experience at an older age. Feel her interest would definitely go down automatically. She would likely want a guy with experience at her age even if it's just for something casual/short term.
That's putting a lot of expectation on her and for all you know, she may not have a lot of experience either. She could have married her high school sweetheart, been married for 25 years and is just now getting back out there herself.
I'm 42. I've had one LTR. I hardly dated before I met him; I've barely dated since he died. My best friend is 41. She got married at 20, divorced at 38 and remarried at 39. My cousin is in her early 50's. She was married for over 30 years before being thrown back into the dating pool.
Age does not necessarily equate to experience.
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