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I know of a few very solid relationships but honestly, I feel it is human nature in general to feel dissatisfied. Though this can make for a very unhappy situation, it may actually be the reason we keep inventing and progressing, so it is a double-edged sword.
My dad seems to think relationship partners are alot like cars. Every time you want something new to drive, you just get a new car and repeat. Same thing with relationships, when you get tired of one, you get another. My dad says, just keep a good reliable one and make sure you change the oil. Don't get caught up in all these new fancy cars (aka new partners). What do you all think?
1. Are people too picky in relationships and just have the grass is greener syndrome?
2. Can anyone just be happy in one relationship without wanting something/someone else?
3. Most important, do you think one person can meet all of your needs?
Speaking only for myself:
1. I am happy right where I am.
2. Yes.
3. I wouldn't expect a mate to meet ALL of my needs. There are times when I need to talk to my sister or another woman. Other times I just need time to myself and have no problem giving space to my SO.
Location: Subconscious Syncope, USA (Northeastern US)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hotbloodedwoman
1. Are people too picky in relationships and just have the grass is greener syndrome?
It would seem, for some. Others seem to know right away they have found the right person, and they are together for a lifetime.
Some people find the right person, but that person makes a mistake, and their partner cant forgive, so they find themselves worse off than they were if they loved their partner enough to forgive them and try to move forward.
Some hook up with psychopaths, and are lucky to get away from it alive.
Life is like a box of chocolates ~ Forrest Gump
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hotbloodedwoman
2. Can anyone just be happy in one relationship without wanting something/someone else?
Yes.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hotbloodedwoman
3. Most important, do you think one person can meet all of your needs?
My dad seems to think relationship partners are alot like cars. Every time you want something new to drive, you just get a new car and repeat. Same thing with relationships, when you get tired of one, you get another. My dad says, just keep a good reliable one and make sure you change the oil. Don't get caught up in all these new fancy cars (aka new partners). What do you all think?
1. Are people too picky in relationships and just have the grass is greener syndrome?
2. Can anyone just be happy in one relationship without wanting something/someone else?
3. Most important, do you think one person can meet all of your needs?
I think your dad is a lying bum when it comes to relationships. He should just stay single that way he always has a different "car."
1. Are people too picky in relationships and just have the grass is greener syndrome?
2. Can anyone just be happy in one relationship without wanting something/someone else?
3. Most important, do you think one person can meet all of your needs?
I dont think we would like to have every single thing just how we wanted it to be. I think we would get bored. I also do not think we want someone like us either. Most of us do not know ourselves well enough to actually define what we want in a partner so many 'wants' are going to be whims which come and go very quickly.
People change and grow. They either grow together at the same rate or they grow apart because one grows quicker than the other. Usually in marriage breakdowns, each has learned as much as they can from the other and need someone else to continue their training. You know the saying "When the student is ready the teacher will appear" well I reckon that applies to marriages and relationships as well.
Of course, there are many who believe you should just battle through it, which may reflect their religious beliefs, but sometimes I think it is better to accept that the relationship is no longer what it was when it started, and to move on.
"Needy people" It is important that one person does not need the other. By that I mean that one person does not feel they need the other in order to be fulfilled and complete. Each person should be complete in themselves and the relationship then brings more, a kind of uniqueness which is personal to each one of them.
What is it you want that the relationship is NOT providing? What IS the relationship providing you? If the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, then why is it not "green enough" on your side? These are the issues you need to address and then if you still want more which your partner cannot provide, then you have to decide whether it is enough to make you move on or stay. You need to be mature enough to realise that anyone else you hook up with will have areas where they will also be unable to fulfill your total list of wants. And so it goes on until you resolve your own issues.
I have had at least 2 cars with over 100,000 miles on the clock. We get used to our car and we know where it is likely to break or go wrong. We often know how to fix it and maybe we carry the right spares in case it does break down. New-to-us models (not necessarily brand new) may still breakdown but until we have had them for a while we dont know the parts which fail and so they may catch us unawares when we are far from home. Even the most beautiful car often has problems.
I realise these 3 questions are hypothetical, but they are still very relevant to many of us.
I think there is not a one-size-fits-all response. It depends upon how each individual functions, besides whom they may become attached to and their compatibility to each other. Some are lucky to have this work with mutuality, positive traits, maturity and acceptance. A few will be stable, content and not seek outside attention, which doesn't mean both may not have friends and interests of their own.
I think there is too much of an expectancy to have it all with one person. Also, if someone is unable to be in a relationship, they should not bother acting as if they could be.
I'm with the love of my life and no I don't believe the grass is greener on the other side.
No he can't be everything to me. I have other needs that only my female friends can satisfy. Women have a different language when they're with other women that men can't relate to.
He can't meet my need to be with shorties and animals either. While he's the biggest part of my life, he's not the only part. That being said, if he leaves before me, I will not survive that loss
You like the look of them, so you buy into it, try them on for awhile, only to find in some cases they're not for you after all! So you move on and try something else until eventually everything fits - in all sense of the word
Being a lesbian, I've had a few shallow relationships that came with no complications, just outright fun & games really; but there have been or two more meaningful relationships that initially were working out quite well, but ultimately all fell apart from one reason or another.
But for the last 4 years I've been lucky enough to find Miss Right; but even after all that time, you can never really be sure of a long-lasting relationship without the possibility of either party getting bored and wanting to try something else.
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