Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
Old 06-24-2016, 03:35 PM
 
78,013 posts, read 60,221,209 times
Reputation: 49404

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck View Post
Oh my expectations may be unreasonable.

When I say free spirit, I mean it is a Thursday and I have a few minutes and want to stop for a beer, or go for a bike ride with a friend.

Or it is the weekend, and I pack up the car and kids and head to the beach. I have had guys dump me because I did not drag them along to the beach. I don't need someone with me all the time.

I don't want freedom to cheat. That is not me. My couch surfer ex even told my new bf that I am incredibly loyal and would never cheat.
I wasn't talking about you. I was giving an example of someone having a different perception of themselves than others have.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 06-24-2016, 04:38 PM
 
6,806 posts, read 4,891,306 times
Reputation: 8594
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck View Post
I am probably not good with the compromise part. I tend to just barrel through doing my own thing. I always wanted the guy that fits into my life, not one that I have to turn my life upside down to accommodate.

One of the things I got onto my bf about last night, is that I no longer feel like I have freedom. I can't just stop into the bar on my way home from work for a drink without having to answer to him. I am use to being a free spirit that just does what I want, when I want. I was like that as a teenager also. My mom would call me, asking when I would be home, and sometimes I was at a beach 8-10 hours away. She never knew where I would turn up. I need freedom.
Yet you then wonder why you end up with guys who don't really want to give much of themselves to you.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-24-2016, 04:40 PM
 
6,806 posts, read 4,891,306 times
Reputation: 8594
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck View Post
For me, I don't need a man to be able to buy a house or drive a nice car. I want someone to help make things easier for me, cuddle with after a hard day, travel with, help with all the things my dad still does, etc.
You want a guy who gives you everything you need without being able to give him what he really needs.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-24-2016, 04:41 PM
 
6,806 posts, read 4,891,306 times
Reputation: 8594
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck View Post
Yes, I need a man that has no problem accepting children that are biologically not his. And one is a hormonal teenager, so she is no fun...
It's not that she is a hormonal teenager. It is that she has no roles models for stability in her life.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-24-2016, 04:41 PM
 
Location: Moreno Valley, Ca
4,038 posts, read 2,698,457 times
Reputation: 8479
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck View Post
I am really happy with myself right now. I would with or without a man. Maybe a little happier Without a man.



This. And focus on your KIDS
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-24-2016, 04:45 PM
 
6,806 posts, read 4,891,306 times
Reputation: 8594
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck View Post
I find that I have lots of contradictions, which probably explains why I struggle with relationships. I want someone to be there when I want them, do what I need, when I need it, but leave me alone when I need to be a free spirit.
That's not going to make a guy feel very safe or secure in a relationship with you... and safe and secure is exactly what a guy who will invest himself for the long run will need in a relationship.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-24-2016, 04:53 PM
 
6,806 posts, read 4,891,306 times
Reputation: 8594
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck View Post
I often take my children. I might be craving some time away from the significant other. But I am not joking when I say he waits for me outside the bathroom door. I can't even pee in peace.

My single girl friends go out more than I do and I go out often. I took my whole family out last night, including my parents, so it is not like I do not believe in spending significant time with family. I do.
Single people generally go out much more by themselves or with their other single friends that do people in committed relationships. That's just generally the way life works for normal people.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-24-2016, 04:57 PM
 
6,806 posts, read 4,891,306 times
Reputation: 8594
Quote:
Originally Posted by LowonLuck View Post
Having a man is not the issue. I can replace men in my life in about 5 seconds, because usually they are already circling waiting like vultures. Finding what I want is another story.
I wonder why the new guy feels insecure.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-24-2016, 08:57 PM
 
8,170 posts, read 6,018,431 times
Reputation: 5963
Quote:
Originally Posted by reneeh63 View Post
Really? I would have thought that by being a mom THAT would have impacted your being able to drink whenever you want!....do you really have kids?
Yes I really have kids. How does having kids prevent one from drinking? I do drink in front of my kids.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-24-2016, 08:59 PM
 
8,170 posts, read 6,018,431 times
Reputation: 5963
Quote:
Originally Posted by reneeh63 View Post
Hahah - then dump the guy and stay offline and out of the bars for a few months....I dare ya! Double dog dare ya!
I can dump the guy, but why would I need to stay offline and give up the bar?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 04:20 AM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top