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He's doing exactly what some guys accuse women of: "Just because we had sex, she acts like I promised her something!" He seems to feel that sex should mean something, but he's the one who wanted to play it cool from the beginning, so stay cool. For all practical purposes, you two are still getting to know each other, like you said before.
Beware he sounds like he could develop into one of those obsessively creepy guys you read about in the media a lot, and not in good circumstances.
You play with fire...
This is an important point. Calling you beautiful daily and worshipping the ground you walk on before he even knows you, hardly? Normally, we here on CD-R would say that violates the "too much too soon" rule; guys like that usually are trying to get something out of you (sex, surprise, surprise), like an early commitment, marriage if you have money and he doesn't, that sort of thing. It's hard to tell in your case whether he's a total manipulator, or just needy. But the super-needy guys can turn into stalkers, so be careful.
I feel like he was maybe trying to use reverse psychology when he said he doesn't do labels.
Instead freaking out and begging him for one - especially once you two had sex - you continued to be totally fine with it, which has now freaked him out because ZOMG, playing games didn't work??? Whaaaaat? Negging was TOTALLY supposed to work.
He sounds kind desperate for a relationship, TBH. How do you feel about him?
I feel like he was maybe trying to use reverse psychology when he said he doesn't do labels.
Instead freaking out and begging him for one - especially once you two had sex - you continued to be totally fine with it, which has now freaked him out because ZOMG, playing games didn't work??? Whaaaaat? Negging was TOTALLY supposed to work.
He sounds kind desperate for a relationship, TBH. How do you feel about him?
I agree that he sounds immature. Either way, whichever scenario you choose, there's a manipulative element in it. Is this something you even want to continue, OP?
This is an important point. Calling you beautiful daily and worshipping the ground you walk on before he even knows you, hardly? Normally, we here on CD-R would say that violates the "too much too soon" rule; guys like that usually are trying to get something out of you (sex, surprise, surprise), like an early commitment, marriage if you have money and he doesn't, that sort of thing. It's hard to tell in your case whether he's a total manipulator, or just needy. But the super-needy guys can turn into stalkers, so be careful.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JerZ
I feel like he was maybe trying to use reverse psychology when he said he doesn't do labels.
Instead freaking out and begging him for one - especially once you two had sex - you continued to be totally fine with it, which has now freaked him out because ZOMG, playing games didn't work??? Whaaaaat? Negging was TOTALLY supposed to work.
He sounds kind desperate for a relationship, TBH. How do you feel about him?
Ruth4Truth and JerZ idk if you remember a few months back i posted about the barista guy. but the guy I'm talking about is him. obviously i want this to work cause I've waited on him for so long and i finally got him and i think he feels the same. and that is why it feels like we are moving a little faster than most "relationships"
i never thought about the whole reverse psych. thing. now that i think about it i feel like he could be doing that on me and now he is really like "oh **** wtf did i do?" and now he's sort of freaking out like what if i don't want him as my bf and just want to hook up.
Ruth4Truth and JerZ idk if you remember a few months back i posted about the barista guy. but the guy I'm talking about is him. obviously i want this to work cause I've waited on him for so long and i finally got him and i think he feels the same. and that is why it feels like we are moving a little faster than most "relationships"
i never thought about the whole reverse psych. thing. now that i think about it i feel like he could be doing that on me and now he is really like "oh **** wtf did i do?" and now he's sort of freaking out like what if i don't want him as my bf and just want to hook up.
i want us to work out. i want him to tell me he want to be my bf instead of playing all these games trying to get a reaction out of me.
What if you take a risk and just tell him that?
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