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Old 08-11-2016, 02:01 PM
 
Location: tokyo
1 posts, read 913 times
Reputation: 10

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I always have some difficulties with relationships, see im not a person who likes to belong too a another person. And the friends that i have are so into Relationship and etc that it seems like they can't live without theirs partners. And im afraid to lose myself and too depend to another person, you know to be really addict to this guy that i can even live my life if i lose him.
So I always avoid guys that probaby loves me. But now .im 20 and i really don't know what to do with myself, i really want to be in a relationships but the idea to show my weakness, my confiance, my heart and all this [Mod cut] really scares me... Hahaha that's so stupid but i don't know if y'all see my situation or understand it...
by the way, im sorry for my bad English, im french but i trying to be better in English.

thank you !

Last edited by PJSaturn; 08-11-2016 at 03:19 PM.. Reason: Inappropriate language.
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Old 08-11-2016, 02:08 PM
 
Location: NYC
16,061 posts, read 26,692,634 times
Reputation: 24848
The way to overcome it is not to lose yourself. To many friends of mine have altered who they are to date or marry someone. The friends I have that are still happily married are those that stayed true to themselves and married someone who loved them for who they are.

My husband and I also create a rule that each year he goes on a boys trip, I go in a girls trip and we have our couples trip. It's important IMO for a healthy relationship to have some independence.
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Old 08-11-2016, 10:56 PM
 
Location: 415->916->602
3,145 posts, read 2,646,080 times
Reputation: 3872
I am deathly afraid because I'm no longer in charge of my emotions. My heart would be in someone else's hand, and if they CHOOSE to be careless, i would be left pissed off and anger. And even though I'm too old to "plot revenge", when they say, "hell has no fury like a woman's storm", pales into comparison of what I'm capable of.
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Old 08-11-2016, 11:19 PM
 
1,481 posts, read 1,222,033 times
Reputation: 1777
I think for most people falling in love can be pretty scary and if you've been burnt before, it's not an experience you keep wanting to relive. However, to really experience love, you have to make yourself vulnerable to the other person.

I find it helps to acknowledge that sometimes awful things happen, but life goes on. If it doesn't work out, you will survive the pain and even live to love again. Don't make your SO your whole world. Continue to nurture your friendships, keep your hobbies & don't become someone you are not to keep a relationship as suggested above.
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Old 08-12-2016, 12:26 AM
 
29,473 posts, read 22,487,125 times
Reputation: 48167
Nope, you're one of the few around here.
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Old 08-12-2016, 02:29 AM
 
Location: The Valley Of No Fun
511 posts, read 401,104 times
Reputation: 418
All your base are belong to us.
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Old 08-12-2016, 05:02 AM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
16,961 posts, read 17,288,409 times
Reputation: 30257
I think, most everyone is afraid of being hurt, much like most people are afraid of death; both are inevitable and part of life - which is too short to be denying yourself love.
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Old 08-12-2016, 07:45 PM
 
728 posts, read 470,770 times
Reputation: 436
I hate the idea of being in relationships. It's goodbye to freedom. You have to go places you don't want to go, meet people you don't want to meet.
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Old 08-12-2016, 07:53 PM
 
Location: In a place beyond human comprehension
8,920 posts, read 7,692,289 times
Reputation: 16655
This fear is very common. The only way to overcome it, is to face it.

As they say, no pain no gain.
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Old 08-13-2016, 09:06 AM
 
14,376 posts, read 18,320,068 times
Reputation: 43047
Nothing wrong with opting to stay single. I've had a very happy life taking that route.
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