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Hey RR, I feel for you, brother! I decided to jump on this forum some months back in order to get a "feel" for what my peers may be experiencing as far as dating/relationships go. Long story short, I just turned 48, not very good looking, been married twice, and my wife is sick. She is doing well right now, in part to me being her caregiver. I have to be a realist, and possibly one day, I may be thrust into the dating scene, f***in' scary! My wife is one good woman, and we even briefly discussed this, even though it's hard for her! BUT, she's been in my exact shoes, having a sick spouse, and eventually losing him! I only know LTR's obviously, being married 20 years out of my 48 years of life! She tells me I'd be fine, no kids, good job, stable, generous, kind, loyal, etc. Sure, all good qualities to have, most importantly she says that I'm a good man! However, I view myself as one of those "cast aside, friend zoned nice guys". Let me be blunt here, it's not like overnight I would turn into this "stud playboy who b a n g s" everything in sight! Through it all, my wife begs to differ, telling me that looks mean nothing at my age, and upwards, I would be considered a commodity...eh, looks grim!
I feel for both of you guys. I'm single and nearly 48. Its been difficult for me. I think its mostly due to location, but its also me. I don't like bar hopping anymore. I'm active, but I don't just randomly meet people. I'm a shy introvert. I have social skills, but I just have a very hard time starting conversations with strangers, which would probably work better for me than OLD. With OLD, the women I want to date (early-mid 30's) cut their search off at 40. I'm better off meeting them in person if I can get out of my head and just relax because I look 10 years younger. Anyway, I understand how you feel about being cast aside as a nice guy. I'm viewed as either that and/or standoffish around people I don't know very well. Its tough. I don't know, maybe if you're in a good city for dating, its different. I'm not, but I sure hope to be back in Atlanta within the next several months.
I feel for both of you guys. I'm single and nearly 48. Its been difficult for me. I think its mostly due to location, but its also me. I don't like bar hopping anymore. I'm active, but I don't just randomly meet people. I'm a shy introvert. I have social skills, but I just have a very hard time starting conversations with strangers, which would probably work better for me than OLD. With OLD, the women I want to date (early-mid 30's) cut their search off at 40. I'm better off meeting them in person if I can get out of my head and just relax because I look 10 years younger. Anyway, I understand how you feel about being cast aside as a nice guy. I'm viewed as either that and/or standoffish around people I don't know very well. Its tough. I don't know, maybe if you're in a good city for dating, its different. I'm not, but I sure hope to be back in Atlanta within the next several months.
Yeah, I prefer the early to mid 30s range myself. I have expanded up to 40 though. I've found some very attractive 40 year olds on Tinder. Of course I'm only going off of their pics. I haven't met anyone from Tinder in person yet as I just signed up a couple days ago. But I've had good results so far. You should give it a shot.
Yeah, I prefer the early to mid 30s range myself. I have expanded up to 40 though. I've found some very attractive 40 year olds on Tinder. Of course I'm only going off of their pics. I haven't met anyone from Tinder in person yet as I just signed up a couple days ago. But I've had good results so far. You should give it a shot.
They're probably on there looking for younger men.
Yeah, I prefer the early to mid 30s range myself. I have expanded up to 40 though. I've found some very attractive 40 year olds on Tinder. Of course I'm only going off of their pics. I haven't met anyone from Tinder in person yet as I just signed up a couple days ago. But I've had good results so far. You should give it a shot.
So you prefer women 12-15 years younger than you, and could possibly consider woman 5 years younger than you. How magnanimous of you.
So you prefer women 12-15 years younger than you, and could possibly consider woman 5 years younger than you. How magnanimous of you.
My boyfriend is 9 years older than I am. But he wasn't looking for a younger girlfriend. In fact, I contacted him first. And I think therein lies the difference.
I can't speak for all other women, but with me, a man 10 years or older than me looking for someone my age specifically was a huge turn off. The reason is my age will change and it's something I have no control over. So the impression (right or wrong) that I took away when I read a man's profile like that is they are looking for a sugar baby, not a relationship. And if I dated him, chances are he'd trade me in for a younger model in a few years. Now I'm not saying that's true, but it's the impression. And I know from talking to other women I'm not the only one who thinks that.
I am posting this as a tip to the OP. Even if it's not your intent, you could be #1 scaring away women who think you are looking for a sugar baby. And #2 Sending a message to sugar babies that you are interested in that kind of relationship.
That works out though, I find men my age to be too argumentative and set in their ways. I think they get frustrated because there aren't many life lessons for them to explain to me. Us "older" women are left w/the under 40 men.
So you prefer women 12-15 years younger than you, and could possibly consider woman 5 years younger than you. How magnanimous of you.
There's nothing unusual about my preferences. And of course they're just that; preferences. As I said, I've expanded my search range up to 40. The dates I've been on so far have been with women in their early 30s, except for one who was 38.
To the poster who said I'm attracting sugar babies, well, I think all women, regardless of age are looking for a man who's secure financially. Which is a perfectly acceptable standard. I think once a woman is into her 30s she's pretty well got her stuff together and she can take care of herself. So she's doesn't need a sugar daddy. Now if I was going after 20 somethings, that would be a whole different story, but I'm not.
There's nothing unusual about my preferences. And of course they're just that; preferences. As I said, I've expanded my search range up to 40. The dates I've been on so far have been with women in their early 30s, except for one who was 38.
To the poster who said I'm attracting sugar babies, well, I think all women, regardless of age are looking for a man who's secure financially. Which is a perfectly acceptable standard. I think once a woman is into her 30s she's pretty well got her stuff together and she can take care of herself. So she's doesn't need a sugar daddy. Now if I was going after 20 somethings, that would be a whole different story, but I'm not.
I think you are talking to me with the last paragraph. Please understand I'm not talking in absolutes, but men looking for a much younger women because of her youth is a red flag to a lot of women and can be an invitation to the wrong kinds of women. I'm just letting you know of this possibility from my perspective on it so you can aware. And don't let age or being "together" fool you. Someone who is looking to take advantage of another financially doesn't change on the 30th birthday. It's usually their inate and lifelong personality and come in all ages. Just be careful.
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