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It is salvageable, it's just I'm not sure what she is thinking as far as how much time she needs? I mean she does text me quite a bit. Vents or asks me to do something for her. I do definitely feel like we will get back together if I don't **** up. I need guidance on how to not be needy and freak out and not text her. I mean "yes just don't do those things" I get this emotional surge that causes me to text or or ask or feel like I'm trying to show her I still care yet she already knows. I don't want to give her to much space where she takes off.
Why would you even think about getting back with a girl who thinks you are annoying and with whom you have to feel like you are walking on eggshells?
Oh yeah, and one who can't be in a relationship with a decent guy without getting bored and sabotaging things.
Do you have a history of picking women who don't treat you so well?
Wait a minute, you are flirting with the bank girl. Why do you wanna repair your broken relationship if you are already with one foot out the door anyway? You kinda lost my empathy.
DUMP HER.
She is coo coo! She does not have a bit of humor in her body, or she is PMSing the whole year
,
Don't be a doormat. There is a chance with her IF you "do not f**k up?" By saying this you admit that you did something wrong, whereas you did not. Or did you, because we do not known the whole story.
And the bank girl? She was a gold digger, all those expenses and time and energy from you and she has a Boyfriend?
You have to develop a better "picker,l" and, you are too nice to women!
Last edited by rent.in.nyc; 10-06-2016 at 12:07 PM..
Don't be a doormat. There is a chance with her IF you "do not f**k up?" By saying this you admit that you did something wrong, whereas you did not. Or did you, because we do not known the whole story.
And the bank girl? She was a gold digger, all those expenses and time and energy from you and she has a Boyfriend?
You have to develop a better "picker."
I don't think we know the backstory?
I am not sure if she is mad because he did something stupid - hence his comment makes sense about not F*ing up again.
BTW, this potentially getting back together is either the second time he has gone through this thing with this girl or it is a pattern with him with previous girls.
Different gf, I lied to her. The above posts about my ex caused me to get depressed hurt myself. I then lied to my work about it saying my father had passed away because I got paid and I wouldn't get in trouble for missing work. Well me and this girl work together. This happened right before we got together. So I've had this burden and secret on my shoulder and she never came over to my house so there were trust issues she had them before me.
So make a long story short I finally told her about my dad and let the truth come out because I really liked her and fell in love with her. She did she didn't think she could forgive me or trust me again but we've slowly been hanging out and texting and she's obviously still pissed after like 11 months of being together and just finding it out. This happened about a month ago.
OP, I learned the following bit of wisdom a long time ago:
Never make someone a priority in your life when you're just an option in theirs.
From what I've read, it sounds like your current ex views you as something of a doormat or convenience item. I get that you want to demonstrate your capacity as a boyfriend/partner, but consider your approach. You're trying every which way you can to "prove yourself" to someone who doesn't seem to want you, and the result seems to be a spiral into a negative self-image and doubt. I've been there--I get it.
My advice would be to move on as best you can. No-contact may not be an option for you, but you can keep things civil and professional. Establish a clear boundary for yourself by saying that you know she wants space and therefore you're going to give it to her. Don't try to define it--just say that you're backing off. When she tries to sweet-talk you into doing something for her, politely decline. (You can lie and say you aren't available if you want, but in my opinion that's just setting yourself up for some other argument later.)
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,930,903 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by JJ1987
Different gf, I lied to her. The above posts about my ex caused me to get depressed hurt myself. I then lied to my work about it saying my father had passed away because I got paid and I wouldn't get in trouble for missing work. Well me and this girl work together. This happened right before we got together. So I've had this burden and secret on my shoulder and she never came over to my house so there were trust issues she had them before me.
So make a long story short I finally told her about my dad and let the truth come out because I really liked her and fell in love with her. She did she didn't think she could forgive me or trust me again but we've slowly been hanging out and texting and she's obviously still pissed after like 11 months of being together and just finding it out. This happened about a month ago.
You ever think about taking a nice break from dating?
So I took everyone's advice and I didn't say anything to her....and then I get a text that says I guess bye for good....seriously what the ****. No more advice I called her and said what's going on and said I thought u told me to not be annoying.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,930,903 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by JJ1987
So I took everyone's advice and I didn't say anything to her....and then I get a text that says I guess bye for good....seriously what the ****. No more advice I called her and said what's going on and said I thought u told me to not be annoying.
Jesus dude, you're a glutton for punishment. Just stop it already.
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