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Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL
You put money and cards in one pile and expect to pay for what, how? Or you mean one person puts the money or card in? Same here, I don't recall getting 2 checks either, as the answer was one check please--I do know it has been asked up front by the server...or else I wouldn't have said that....
They split it on the cards. That's what usually happens when I'm out with a friend. When I was a server that was a huge percentage of the transactions as well.
Or one person uses a card and the other gives them cash.
They split it on the cards. That's what usually happens when I'm out with a friend. When I was a server that was a huge percentage of the transactions as well.
Or one person uses a card and the other gives them cash.
I don't mix it all up and pile it in...
I do picture what you're saying though.
I only ask for Separate Checks when I'm with my sister.
As far as I can remember, I've always been asked about separate checks (even for parties of 2) in the 1+ year I've been in North Carolina, but it wasn't always the case before that in Boston. So I have a feeling it has to do with POS systems - newer ones probably make it easier to split checks and so servers are more likely to ask about it now.
To the thread topic, I don't understand why so many people get bent out of shape about $5-10 (in this case, I'm referring to the OP's date, not her). If extending yourself that much is a huge strain on your budget (and there were definitely periods where that personally was the case for me), how is it possible to even go out anywhere at all?
If he was asking to split a $29 when you paid $5, then yes that's ridiculous and I wouldn't see that guy again.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Just A Guy
Are you expecting to be treated to a meal the first time you meet up with someone? Are you expecting him to pay for everything while you get to know him and then decide if things are right for a long term thing?
If so, you are setting yourself up for failure.
I completely agree. I'm a bit annoyed by women saying they want "old-fashioned" courtships with men because it normally entails the man paying for everything, opening the car doors, bringing flowers...essentially putting in a lot of money, while babying a grown woman. I know this is also about 'chivalry' and if men LIKE to do this, then I guess that's fine, but for women to expect it seems overreaching to me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeoffD
I'm trying to figure out why a thread about a disaster first date is titled "Long term relationship".
Wait a minute. You expect him to bring flowers on a first date??? As for his paying for the meal, I can understand. But I'm not bringing flowers to some woman I haven't even met!
I'm thinking she didn't exactly mean a guy should buy flowers for her on the first date, but I thought of that too.
I don't buy flowers anywhere near the first date or any point when I'm not exclusive with someone.
Not sure if I'm buying this or not, I can't imagine a guy doing something like this, specially since there was such a disparity between the two costs and not to mention if he asked you out he should have paid, at least until you become a couple as was mentioned. IDK.
Assuming this is legit, I'd say tell the guy to move on, rather strange behavior on his part, run up a big tab and expect you to pay half is pretty rude.
It was one bill, he said that when he's gone on dates with other women he has met from OLD, they split the bill. To me this screams of someone who lacks basic manners, and I will not be seeing him again. I haven't dated in over a decade since I was married, recently divorced and single so trying to meet someone decent to fall in love.
I prefer traditional dating and getting to know each other, maybe I expect too much, but it's my life and I would like to have the chance to live it the way I see fit. This is what makes me happy, I understand there are people who may be offended but if you can't afford to court a woman than maybe consider not dating until you can. I personally believe a man who is cheap, is also cheap with his feelings and affection. Been there, done that, this time around, I would like to find someone who is not extravagant and a show off but someone who manages his money and also enjoys treating a lady with class.
I'm not into the unisex style where women are treated like men and expected to pay for their meal/share, this is ridiculous imo, if I am getting dolled up, my hair, nails and makeup done plus dressing nice than absolutely believe the man should show some old fashioned chivalry.
It was one bill, he said that when he's gone on dates with other women he has met from OLD, they split the bill. To me this screams of someone who lacks basic manners, and I will not be seeing him again. I haven't dated in over a decade since I was married, recently divorced and single so trying to meet someone decent to fall in love.
I prefer traditional dating and getting to know each other, maybe I expect too much, but it's my life and I would like to have the chance to live it the way I see fit. This is what makes me happy, I understand there are people who may be offended but if you can't afford to court a woman than maybe consider not dating until you can. I personally believe a man who is cheap, is also cheap with his feelings and affection. Been there, done that, this time around, I would like to find someone who is not extravagant and a show off but someone who manages his money and also enjoys treating a lady with class.
I'm not into the unisex style where women are treated like men and expected to pay for their meal/share, this is ridiculous imo, if I am getting dolled up, my hair, nails and makeup done plus dressing nice than absolutely believe the man should show some old fashioned chivalry.
Why not mention some of this stuff in your OLD profile?? That could help clear up some of the confusion. Are you younger than 30??? I think the kids these days are more into splitting the check and chivalry isn't in the forefront of younger peoples mode of operating.
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