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Uh, what? They go to the mediator to avoid going to counsel. Everytime I've seen people use mediators that is what they've done. What is the point of the couple hiring a mediator AND having counsel? That is just throwing money away. They might consult one before signing off (they should to review the final agreement and to file it), but that's damn cheap comparatively.
Court ordered? It starts with the mediator. The couple decides to divorce, they go to a mediator, hammer out an agreement (to avoid lawyer fees, etc) and then file it with the court and have a judge sign off. Maybe CA is very different in that?
We had private mediation to get a settlement and child custody/support agreement, but we each had our own attorneys to do the paperwork and we still had to all show up in court. My ex was terrified that if we did it ourselves we would make a mistake and we would accidentally remain married!
LOL, Actually I think it was his girlfriend who was terrified. He never would have never got around to filing for divorce himself, so I had to do it eventually.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,935,179 times
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Originally Posted by zentropa
We had private mediation to get a settlement and child custody/support agreement, but we each had our own attorneys to do the paperwork and we still had to all show up in court. My ex was terrified that if we did it ourselves we would make a mistake and we would accidentally remain married!
Sure, and I'm sure that was cheaper (i.e. less money for lawyers) than skipping the private mediation and just battling it out adversarial style with your own lawyers in the court room, which would have been the likely outcome before no fault divorces.
Court ordered? It starts with the mediator. The couple decides to divorce, they go to a mediator, hammer out an agreement (to avoid lawyer fees, etc) and then file it with the court and have a judge sign off. Maybe CA is very different in that?
I'm sure that if the parties are amenable, it can start with a mediator. Heck, the courts would be thrilled just to have to "sign off" on a divorce decree.
In many cases, however, it's just not that simple.
I'd venture to say that there's been no real lessening of the level of contentiousness in certain cases since the advent of "no-fault divorce". Not having to prove a misdeed on the part of the other party doesn't really lessen the emotions of some people when it comes to kids or money, I'd say.
Also, there are cases where there are more complicated issues where it would be wise on the part of the litigants to have counsel present during any settlement talks. Having a lawyer look at it after the fact might not be the smartest move in some cases.
In the jurisdictions that I am familiar with, court-ordered mediation is the rule rather than the exception for most non-criminal cases, including divorces. Of course, if the parties have their ducks in a row before they file, this doesn't apply. But, yes, before a case goes to trial, chances are very good that there will be a requirement for the parties to have engaged in good faith mediation, or to give the court a damn good reason why they haven't. Unless one or both of the parties are representing themselves in the proceeding, their counsel will most likely be present during this mediation process. Likely, the hourly billing will be less than it would be in a courtroom setting, but this sort of mediation process is not cheap, by any means.
Sure, and I'm sure that was cheaper (i.e. less money for lawyers) than skipping the private mediation and just battling it out adversarial style with your own lawyers in the court room, which would have been the likely outcome before no fault divorces.
Yes I think my entire mediation/divorce cost $2000.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,935,179 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa
Yes I think my entire mediation/divorce cost $2000.
Poor lawyers
(Note: Some of my best friends are lawyers, there are some good ones out there that work to better the world and fight injustice and promote a better society. )
(Note: Some of my best friends are lawyers, there are some good ones out there that work to better the world and fight injustice and promote a better society. )
Good to know that some lawyers have your seal of approval.
Seriously though, many lawyers would be out of business if people stopped being so contentious. Good thing for them that human nature is what it is.
Yes I think my entire mediation/divorce cost $2000.
That sounds about right, I had a divorce with a custody arrangement for relatively low financial cost.
The funny thing is, when reading this thread, I was wondering what the hell no-fault entailed? I must live in a no fault state, and the circumstances of my divorce would have crated an obvious fault on one side anyway so it never crossed my mind.
In the end, it was Valentine's day, and only my lawyer and I showed up for the court date. The judge asked what I wanted, I accepted whatever his Honour would believe to be fair and that worked out great, more than I had hoped for. I had forgotten all about pensions
Short of filing pro se I lawyered up, it was straight forward. The ex didn't retain council and it was $1,200 to get it done. I came away with a house, my tools, trucks and retirement.
Contention or not attorneys serve a very important purpose. To making sure you are represented. Whether it is estate, divorce, custody, criminal defense or whatever.
When I cite someone I keep in mind that defense attorney is there make sure that the person I am taking action against has their due process and I follow the procedures correctly.
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