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Old 11-19-2016, 10:41 AM
 
Location: Reno, NV
5,987 posts, read 10,449,819 times
Reputation: 10809

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Quote:
Originally Posted by reneeh63 View Post
Sure, but a man should know HIMSELF well enough to not put someone through weeks of a relationship if looks/body are that important. I find it a bit unlikely for so shallow a man to even be willing to wait weeks for sex but I'm going along with the OP....cuz I don't wanna start no trouble
He is probably a normal, decent man who respected her wishes to wait for sex, and then found out she was very deceptive about her appearance. He couldn't know just how unattractive she was until the clothes came off. He's probably not even shallow - just highly disappointed.

 
Old 11-19-2016, 10:49 AM
 
19,965 posts, read 30,111,427 times
Reputation: 40023
id say that guy was a bit confused and uses any restroom he wants



nothing wrong with a little marbling on a woman,,,a real man knows this and doesn't expect a woman to look like a greyhound and be able to count her ribs..


whats wrong with people today????
 
Old 11-19-2016, 10:51 AM
 
Location: Middle of the valley
48,436 posts, read 34,627,532 times
Reputation: 73585
It's not like you can consciously decide to be attracted to someone, it's either there or it's not. It's an unfortunate situation, but can't be helped.

I kinda had a similar thing when I was in my 20s. After sleeping with the guy I wasn't interested, but didn't want to be cruel, so I dated him a couple more months and broke up then.
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Old 11-19-2016, 10:54 AM
 
2,867 posts, read 1,532,720 times
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At least he did not close his eyes and fantasize and have sex with her and then break off with her. That shows he is not really a jerk. He is just not attracted to her. Sometimes this happens.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
LOL. I can't be the only woman who has been unpleasantly surprised by, er, body hair, etc. when the clothes come off.

Works both ways, fellas.
Yes, I agree. I have been unpleasantly surprised by some things too.

How to break off with somebody after seeing them nude? The same way you do when you learn anything about somebody that would be a "dealbreaker." You say you do not think it is going to work out. It is not necessary to be hurtful and critique somebody's body.

This is why I will never wear something like Spanx or use a lot of heavy make-up and "contouring" like you see these days. I am not perfect. What you see is what you get. This gives an advantage because when you are not perfect then he can feel okay that he is not perfect. Being imperfect makes you more approachable, in my opinion. Then both of you know you are wanted for who and what you are, not an illusion you put out. Dress nice, be groomed, and show some self-esteem for yourself, of course, but there is a difference between making yourself presentable to go out in public and faking what you look like. Be "authentic" as the buzzwords say.
 
Old 11-19-2016, 11:10 AM
 
6,806 posts, read 4,891,306 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle View Post
Okay, sure, but you can't see how devastating and humiliating it might be to a woman who thought she had a real connection with someone and allowed herself to be as vulnerable as she could with him, only to discover that he couldn't stand the sight of her? This isn't just a typical, "I don't think we're a good match. Good luck!" situation.
What do you think he should do? Just pretend he is attracted to her?
 
Old 11-19-2016, 11:11 AM
 
6,806 posts, read 4,891,306 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by reneeh63 View Post
Sure, but a man should know HIMSELF well enough to not put someone through weeks of a relationship if looks/body are that important. I find it a bit unlikely for so shallow a man to even be willing to wait weeks for sex but I'm going along with the OP....cuz I don't wanna start no trouble
Finding someone unattractive when you see her naked is no more shallow than you finding someone unattractive with clothes on.
 
Old 11-19-2016, 11:13 AM
 
Location: Middle of the valley
48,436 posts, read 34,627,532 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Just A Guy View Post
Finding someone unattractive when you see her naked is no more shallow than you finding someone unattractive with clothes on.
Or being not being attracted to their personality or sense of humor.

No one needs to justify not being attracted to someone. It's not something you have control over.
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Old 11-19-2016, 11:14 AM
 
19,965 posts, read 30,111,427 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Seija View Post
At least he did not close his eyes and fantasize and have sex with her and then break off with her. That shows he is not really a jerk. He is just not attracted to her. Sometimes this happens.



Yes, I agree. I have been unpleasantly surprised by some things too.

How to break off with somebody after seeing them nude? The same way you do when you learn anything about somebody that would be a "dealbreaker." You say you do not think it is going to work out. It is not necessary to be hurtful and critique somebody's body.

This is why I will never wear something like Spanx or use a lot of heavy make-up and "contouring" like you see these days. I am not perfect. What you see is what you get. This gives an advantage because when you are not perfect then he can feel okay that he is not perfect. Being imperfect makes you more approachable, in my opinion. Then both of you know you are wanted for who and what you are, not an illusion you put out. Dress nice, be groomed, and show some self-esteem for yourself, of course, but there is a difference between making yourself presentable to go out in public and faking what you look like. Be "authentic" as the buzzwords say.
don't be giving men too much credit here...when's the last time you heard a man use the word "contouring"

men are like dogs..... you ever give a dog a popsicle on a hot day?? does he complain about the color?? no!! he's just thankful he has a popsicle!! and happy


maybe I'm just use to the maine ladies.... we have a motto "beauty is but a light-switch away "
 
Old 11-19-2016, 11:17 AM
 
Location: Middle of the valley
48,436 posts, read 34,627,532 times
Reputation: 73585
I agree with her. You always hear guys talking about waking up with someone who looked completely different the night before.

I never did anything extreme (spanks) when dating..... no false advertising.
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Old 11-19-2016, 11:18 AM
 
251 posts, read 187,884 times
Reputation: 587
What's a lady supposed to do lift up her shirt on the first date and expose her belly so the guy knows right away that she has stretch marks and say “hey by the way my boobs aren't this perky either, I'm wearing a push-up bra?"

As a woman I too have been slightly surprised when I man takes off his clothes and I see a little jiggle in his belly or when something isn't as large as I may prefer but we're all people and I don't expect perfection. Confidence and a desire to please goes a long way. Perfection is boring anyway.

If a person really feels that repulsed by the sight of a naked body than they have their own issues to sort out. This lady deserves better. Someone will love her body, saggy bits and all.
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