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Is it wrong to want a guy to save you? to rescue you from problems you're facing?
Is it too knight in shining amour? Everyone agrees that support helps us face life's problems so is it really that bad ?
I can't help but think how a million times easier my life would be right now if I had a partner.
But I don't think I'd even be thinking about a partner at all if I wasn't facing problems in my life? If everything was easier.
You know what? As a guy, I've played the rescuer in the past, and got burned.
Too many people mistook my kindness for weakness, and I know that it's happened to others. You bend over backwards for some woman you're bat**** crazy over, figuring that she's going to land in your arms....only for her to friendzone you at best. Smart guys won't be anyone's doormat.
It depends on how destitute you are emotionally as if you're not there emotionally enough on your own, no one will actually be able to "save" you. Which is why they say to never depend on someone else for your happiness because it never turns out well.
However if you want a partner and someone to share the ups & downs one faces and to have that comfort of knowing you're not alone and you have someone that cares and will be there for you, there's nothing wrong with that and it's partially why we desire a partner in the first place.
No one really desires to go through life alone and with no one to share their time with however many people close themselves off to the idea for various reasons and to not deal with the sacrifices it makes to actually allow someone emotionally close enough to make a difference.
It's often times when things are going wrong when you see how it's really not so great trying to tackle everything on your own and how nice it would be to have someone you could call and that would be there for you without reserve. You're just vulnerable right now but it might be time to really evaluate your life and set some new priorities.
You know what? As a guy, I've played the rescuer in the past, and got burned.
Too many people mistook my kindness for weakness, and I know that it's happened to others. You bend over backwards for some woman you're bat**** crazy over, figuring that she's going to land in your arms....only for her to friendzone you at best. Smart guys won't be anyone's doormat.
No more Mr. Nice Guy.
Awww sorry this happened to you and have you feeling cynical but not all women would take advantage of you but you just have to learn who's deserving of you bending over backwards and who's not. If a woman just broke up with a guy and she's still talking about him or bring up her ex, move on. If you're helping her but she's spending all her free time with her friends or finding excuses to not have time for you, stop helping her and move on.
Don't keep giving and giving when you're obviously not getting anything back in return and it's clear she's not making an effort to at least try to meet you half way. Some men do the same to women, the woman is nice, sweet, and accommodating and always available for him only for him to continue to chase women that he has to buy their affection. Instead of generally being interested in the woman who likes him for him.
Even if intellectually a female wants to be "saved" they still have their genetics to contend with which will tend to attract them to the more dysfunctional men just because responsible provider males are "boring"
Like someone else in the thread mentioned, women "friendzone" the type of guys they should be marrying and cry and brude to their girlfriends over the guys they get all giggly over, you know the types and have heard the stories over and over again...
I have to be careful about overgeneralizing though or I'll get another infraction, haha. Provider males have to learn not to take it personally.. it's just genetics.. you have to man up a bit and get a backbone and learn to be more of a "gamma" male to get more attention/respect from women, not just be a doormat. Like it or not, you have to get cocky because that turns em on. They especially like to be kept laughing in a kind of slightly rebellious, slightly naughty sort of manner. If you can't do this, you have an uphill battle ahead of you.
Never obsess over any given woman.. they don't like that and there's too many out there to obsess over one.. if she's not into you, she's not into you.. get over it. Never, EVER, save a person, man or woman, financially. Emotionally only, especially if they have reckless spending habits, and demand a prenup if you are going to get serious.
Yes it's wrong, people shouldn't depend on someone to rescue them, rescue yourself. That's just pathetic. Women need to get over the whole knight in shining armor bs, it's unrealistic.
Awww sorry this happened to you and have you feeling cynical but not all women would take advantage of you.
Did Rick say ALL women would?
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