blue collar vs white collar. social class and relationships (girlfriend, marry, girl)

[gentlearts]

I don't think it matters what a person's job is, it's more about whether or not they are passionate about it...do they have drive or not.
It would be highly unlikely that a college educated professional could be attracted to a high school drop out who worked at Burger King, unless that person had a killer work ethic and the drive to improve themself. In which case, that person might bring a lot to the relationship.
I'd rather be married to a guy with the city's best string of garbage trucks, than to some hack lawyer.

[professorsenator]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

At the risk of being a snob, it's a pretty important factor. You're not just marrying the person. You're marrying the family, the friends, and entire ball of wax. Not saying that it can't be done, but it's not easy.

cpg35223 is correct. Hollywood Cinderella stories aside, the reality is that major social class differences are rarely bridged in romantic relationships due to the inherent difficulties such relationships pose on numerous fronts. Family and friends are very important considerations, as are professional ties. The further up the SES scale one goes, the more that personal lives and professional lives tend to become intertwined and inseparable.

[Fat Freddy]

Originally Posted by professorsenator

major social class differences are rarely bridged in romantic relationships

The main reason for this is that the rich and the poor live in different worlds which rarely intersect so individual members of either class never interact.

[practical_lady]

White collar....blue collar....no collar....

Take a moment to think about what traits you consider most important in a mate?

Are you looking for industriousness, common sense, intelligence, a nice bank account/investment portfolio, patience, kindness, honesty, curl your toes passion, sense of humor, spiritual values, respect for self as well as respect for parents, children, siblings, the elderly, co-workers, etc. These are all important traits to possess. Personally, I enjoy the company of a good man with an interest in community involvement. I also enjoy sailing/boating

If he can operate the vacuum, cook, iron or do laundry on a regular basis....oh, I am in LUV!!! The same goes for the man who can write a note for the cleaning service to perform those same tasks.

These traits are based on the man and his upbringing, not whether he is white collar or blue collar. A GOOD man is a wonderful mate.

Also, what do YOU bring to the table? Let's not forget that a healthy relationship is based on many things, most importantly, love, respect, compromise, compatability, and shared interests.

[velociraptor]

IMO

A blue collar man should NEVER pursue a white collar woman.

By that I mean that a man should NEVER pursue a woman who earns more than him, EVER. Period.

The only time I'd consider it "ok" for a blue collar man to be with a white collar woman who earns more than him is IF the woman pursued him.

Men pursuing = Works to the womans advantage, by pursuing the man puts the woman on a pedstal.

BUT

It evens out when the man earns more money and that equals a healthy balanced relationship.

A relationship where the man earns less is not healthy, it's not balanced. The woman has every upper hand and the man has no "power" in the relationship... he is emasculated.

[henry1]

Originally Posted by practical_lady

White collar....blue collar....no collar....

Take a moment to think about what traits you consider most important in a mate?

Are you looking for industriousness, common sense, intelligence, a nice bank account/investment portfolio, patience, kindness, honesty, curl your toes passion, sense of humor, spiritual values, respect for self as well as respect for parents, children, siblings, the elderly, co-workers, etc. These are all important traits to possess. Personally, I enjoy the company of a good man with an interest in community involvement. I also enjoy sailing/boating

If he can operate the vacuum, cook, iron or do laundry on a regular basis....oh, I am in LUV!!! The same goes for the man who can write a note for the cleaning service to perform those same tasks.

These traits are based on the man and his upbringing, not whether he is white collar or blue collar. A GOOD man is a wonderful mate.

Also, what do YOU bring to the table? Let's not forget that a healthy relationship is based on many things, most importantly, love, respect, compromise, compatability, and shared interests.

The lady i seen there in the NYC is a lawyer and smart as all get out and it shows in her business .She also has a wicked sense of humor and she goes i finaily found someone who get my sense of humor ..

but she find it funny that i can sew and cook and iron a blouse if it need ..

one day she lost a button on a blouse at her office ..I asked for a small sewing kit that someone had at the office and i sit down one and sew a button back on to the blouse that it came off and as a joke she asked me could you make a dress from a pattern and i go yes i learned to sew and useing a sewing machine in home economics in high school.

but what makes us work as a couple is that she never lets herself get above the whole thing i'm better than you because i have a degree and i make more money than you type of thinking

[LadyKLO]

Originally Posted by velociraptor

IMO

A blue collar man should NEVER pursue a white collar woman.

By that I mean that a man should NEVER pursue a woman who earns more than him, EVER. Period.

The only time I'd consider it "ok" for a blue collar man to be with a white collar woman who earns more than him is IF the woman pursued him.

Men pursuing = Works to the womans advantage, by pursuing the man puts the woman on a pedstal.

BUT

It evens out when the man earns more money and that equals a healthy balanced relationship.

A relationship where the man earns less is not healthy, it's not balanced. The woman has every upper hand and the man has no "power" in the relationship... he is emasculated.

This is kinda funny....maybe it works for you but not for me...

I was married before...my exhusband is a registered nurse and I am an engineer. When I married him, he was a young man in school. He became a nurse and we bought a house like many people do when their incomes change. In the beginning, I made considerably more than he did but we knew that his salary would eventually catch up to mine. It didn't matter because we divorced anyway!

My current boyfriend is in the military and he is an enlisted petty officer...my salary is a definitely a lot more than his...do I care...no...

Having the experience of being married before and now divorced, it is truly about being happy and I will take that any day over someone who might make more and might treat me like dirt. My military man is awesome! You can't look at it as a man being emasculated....he is only emasculated if he allows someone to treat him like that!

Every man I have ever dated in my life, I have always made more than them and it hasn't been an issue. I'm a down home kinda girl...my mom was the same way...college educated and she married my blue collar dad...40 years later and they are still like teenagers...

[LadyKLO]

Originally Posted by henry1

The lady i seen there in the NYC is a lawyer and smart as all get out and it shows in her business .She also has a wicked sense of humor and she goes i finaily found someone who get my sense of humor ..

but she find it funny that i can sew and cook and iron a blouse if it need ..

one day she lost a button on a blouse at her office ..I asked for a small sewing kit that someone had at the office and i sit down one and sew a button back on to the blouse that it came off and as a joke she asked me could you make a dress from a pattern and i go yes i learned to sew and useing a sewing machine in home economics in high school.

but what makes us work as a couple is that she never lets herself get above the whole thing i'm better than you because i have a degree and i make more money than you type of thinking

Awesome post..my boyfriend and cook and sew too...he is more domesticated than I am...I just never learned!

[henry1]

Originally Posted by LadyKLO

Awesome post..my boyfriend and cook and sew too...he is more domesticated than I am...I just never learned!

She once asked me how did i learned how to do alot of thing and i tell her that the US military and my mother taught me alot and beening on my own for a long time has taught me alot of skills that i need



Alot of her office worker ask her when i'm going to cook again for her and bring it to work for her ..So now i learned to make enough for everyone when i make her lunch and bring to her ..they also ask for my socalled fake pineapple salad i make

[Amelorn]

I have to speak against mixed class marriages, as I am the product of a failed one.

Class is not only a matter of income, but also a host of other factors. Consider values, taste, aspirations, recreation, culture, politics etc etc.

Mom's parents by that point were very white collar. Executive, country club, Cadillac, vacation property, European vacations etc etc. Naturally, she went to college. This was never up for debate. Dad was an alcoholic cop from a family of essentially the same things. He dropped out after a semester. Don't ask me how or why that relationship came to pass. All I can say is that life would have been much easier and different for the better had she married "one of her own."