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I have been seeing this guy since October and I noticed something strange about his approach to religion. Whenever I try to touch on the subject, he gets mad and claims he's an atheist. I don't have any judgment on the matter, it's fine.
The problem is he claims he's an atheist, yet on his Facebook page, he always likes Jewish pages, follows 'Jewish students' pages, likes Jewish posts in hebrew ... so on and so forth. Even his name is in hebrew (in brackets) on Facebook! I understand he may have been brought up in the Jewish faith which he may or may not have departed from, but he always get mad when we talk about religion and keeps saying he's atheist.
Another issue is since I have Middle-Eastern roots, he assumes I'm Muslim which we have discussed to extreme lengths already and he knows my stance on religion. Hence, he shouldn't feel afraid of telling me about his 'supposed' Jewish background. It's written all over his Facebook yet he won't tell me. He's never told me about religion period aside from the usual 'I'm an atheist'.
I don't understand. He's even open about it with his friends who seem to have given him a Jewish nickname, yet with me, it's taboo. I feel as though at this stage, we're fine to talk about religion, especially as we've known each other for two years!
He's got no problem using Arab words to tease me though he knows I have no affiliation to my roots, but he can't bring himself to open up a bit about his.
Why is he so sensitive with me? What is wrong with him?
Many thanks!
Last edited by LostinPhilly; 12-13-2016 at 03:12 PM..
OP, I get that you feel excluded from that part of his life, like he's not able to share that important thing with you. I think he has personal issues with people from an Islamic background, even if you're not much into it. I imagine it has nothing to do with you personally. He seems to have some kind of block in his mind.
If you were to say, "But you've got all this Jewish-themed stuff on your FB page, and all these Jewish-topic "Likes". Can't we talk about it? I'm cool with that; if it's a part of your life, I'd like to share that", it would probably freak him out more. He'd feel cornered, or something. I'm stumped as to how to get through to him.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LostinPhilly
Hi all,
I have been seeing this guy since October and I noticed something strange about his approach to religion. Whenever I try to touch on the subject, he gets mad and claims he's an atheist. I don't have any judgment on the matter, it's fine.
The problem is he claims he's an atheist, yet on his Facebook page, he always likes Jewish pages, follows 'Jewish students' pages, likes Jewish posts in hebrew ... so on and so forth. Even his name is in hebrew (in brackets) on Facebook! I understand he may have been brought up in the Jewish faith which he may or may not have departed from, but he always get mad when we talk about religion and keeps saying he's atheist.
Another issue is since I have Middle-Eastern roots, he assumes I'm Muslim which we have discussed to extreme lengths already and he knows my stance on religion. Hence, he shouldn't feel afraid of telling me about his 'supposed' Jewish background. It's written all over his Facebook yet he won't tell me. He's never told me about religion period aside from the usual 'I'm an atheist'.
I don't understand. He's even open about it with his friends who seem to have given him a Jewish nickname, yet with me, it's taboo. I feel as though at this stage, we're fine to talk about religion, especially as we've known each other for two years!
He's got no problem using Arab words to tease me though he knows I have no affiliation to my roots, but he can't bring himself to open up a bit about his.
Why is he so sensitive with me? What is wrong with him?
Many thanks!
The bolded does not mean anything. I have Christian friends, like Christian music, follow Christian authors, and I'm definitely an atheist. I think y'all need to be completely about your religious beliefs.
OP, I get that you feel excluded from that part of his life, like he's not able to share that important thing with you. I think he has personal issues with people from an Islamic background, even if you're not much into it. I imagine it has nothing to do with you personally. He seems to have some kind of block in his mind.
I definitely feel slightly excluded. I do not see how I can possibly have this relationship progress if such an important part of his life is kept hidden from me.
He indeed has slight issues with Arabs altogether, I believe (he makes more or less racist jokes whenever the opportunity arises around his friends) which makes me wonder why he chased me so much before and why he's dating me.
I know he's also supportive of the Israeli Defence Forces, so it emphasizes the idea that he's not that neutral about religion because he's clearly taking a stance on a geo-political matter, in line with his background. He should know that if he's dating me, he's going to have to talk about it sooner or later.
The bolded does not mean anything. I have Christian friends, like Christian music, follow Christian authors, and I'm definitely an atheist. I think y'all need to be completely about your religious beliefs.
In all honesty, you can't be a part of the 'Union of Jewish Students' of XYZ city if you're not Jewish. He himself says he doesn't celebrate Christmas. I don't know a lot of people who follow Jewish pages, like posts in Hebrew, support the Israeli Defense Forces and follow 'Jewish Students Unions' (not Christian, Atheist/Agnostic/Muslim) in every country they've lived in, unless they're involved to some degree.
Christianity is different. It has more of a larger impact than Judaism. For someone to be interested that deeply into Jewish groups, he has to somewhat have an affiliation. Jewish Student Unions don't allow you in if you're not Jewish. I don't see any Christian or Muslim pages on his Facebook. His friends calling him a Jewish name?! Really?!
OP, I get that you feel excluded from that part of his life, like he's not able to share that important thing with you. I think he has personal issues with people from an Islamic background, even if you're not much into it. I imagine it has nothing to do with you personally. He seems to have some kind of block in his mind.
If you were to say, "But you've got all this Jewish-themed stuff on your FB page, and all these Jewish-topic "Likes". Can't we talk about it? I'm cool with that; if it's a part of your life, I'd like to share that", it would probably freak him out more. He'd feel cornered, or something. I'm stumped as to how to get through to him.
I actually asked it like that the first time around. He got so mad. I had to stop the conversation. He was like: 'I see where this is going. I'm an atheist'. He didn't even let me address the Jewish theme and got mad (which got me mad in return).
I actually asked it like that the first time around. He got so mad. I had to stop the conversation. He was like: 'I see where this is going. I'm an atheist'. He didn't even let me address the Jewish theme and got mad (which got me mad in return).
How did you bring it up? Did he feel like you were trying to start a fight because of your own background?
I actually asked it like that the first time around. He got so mad. I had to stop the conversation. He was like: 'I see where this is going. I'm an atheist'. He didn't even let me address the Jewish theme and got mad (which got me mad in return).
Sounds like he has some major issues. You say he makes "slightly racist" jokes? Why would you even tolerate that? Disgusting.
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