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Old 12-14-2016, 02:22 PM
 
Location: NYC
466 posts, read 314,649 times
Reputation: 231

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For months now, I have been hearing men and women on other forums and in articles stating that they would give it a shot however they would treat it as a new relationship. Could you guys and girls do this if you knew your partner has been with multiple people after the original break up? Or would you consider if they did not have sex with anyone after the separation? Also would being the dumpee or the dumper change your input on getting back with them?

My personal opinion is as long as she did not get with another man sexually I would give it a shot if things did not workout between me and someone else. I couldn't view it as a different relationship knowing she broke it with me, went after the grass is greener and messed with other dudes.... Then now she wants to come back? I know I wouldn't accept that.
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Old 12-14-2016, 02:46 PM
 
30,902 posts, read 32,998,960 times
Reputation: 26919
I couldn't possibly treat it as "a new relationship." It's NOT a new relationship.

I thought I was going to try this just once. The man had found me again after 10 years. You'd think in all that time, with maturing, changing, life circumstances (by then we were both parents and both divorced) and so on, it really WOULD be a new relationship. Nope. The same intense attraction was there, both physically and mentally...but so were the old problems. It didn't even take until our first official date (until then we just talked on the phone numerous times, and emailed) for the issues to resurface. Not full-blown, but I could feel it coming. So I cut it off.

I wouldn't try it again with anyone. IMO, when you have broken up with someone, there is a reason, or reasons. Nostalgia makes you forget those reasons. Dating again brings them right back.
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Old 12-14-2016, 02:50 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
16,960 posts, read 17,339,729 times
Reputation: 30258
Yeah, I'm not dumpster diving once I throw garbage away. Getting back with ex's is nonnegotiable for me. Friends, however, I will consider.
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Old 12-14-2016, 02:57 PM
 
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,699 posts, read 41,737,988 times
Reputation: 41381
My take; Don't.
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Old 12-14-2016, 02:59 PM
 
Location: Jupiter
10,216 posts, read 8,305,593 times
Reputation: 8628
I did it once but she moved away for college.
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Old 12-14-2016, 03:05 PM
 
Location: Chicago. Kind of.
2,894 posts, read 2,452,154 times
Reputation: 7984
All I want my exes to be is "Done".
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Old 12-14-2016, 03:49 PM
 
Location: SW MO
23,593 posts, read 37,475,357 times
Reputation: 29337
They would be an ex for a reason.
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Old 12-14-2016, 03:56 PM
 
Location: NYC
466 posts, read 314,649 times
Reputation: 231
Quote:
Originally Posted by JerZ View Post
I couldn't possibly treat it as "a new relationship." It's NOT a new relationship.

I thought I was going to try this just once. The man had found me again after 10 years. You'd think in all that time, with maturing, changing, life circumstances (by then we were both parents and both divorced) and so on, it really WOULD be a new relationship. Nope. The same intense attraction was there, both physically and mentally...but so were the old problems. It didn't even take until our first official date (until then we just talked on the phone numerous times, and emailed) for the issues to resurface. Not full-blown, but I could feel it coming. So I cut it off.

I wouldn't try it again with anyone. IMO, when you have broken up with someone, there is a reason, or reasons. Nostalgia makes you forget those reasons. Dating again brings them right back.
I agree with you, well I don't think I would even give my ex a chance. As you said once you break up there is a reason and I wouldn't want to relive the negative moments with extra beef sacs pouring their grease over my taco.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut View Post
Yeah, I'm not dumpster diving once I throw garbage away. Getting back with ex's is nonnegotiable for me. Friends, however, I will consider.
Well if you dumped them but what if you were dumped?
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Dissenter View Post
My take; Don't.
agree.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 49ersfan27 View Post
I did it once but she moved away for college.
how did it feel?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Missy2U View Post
All I want my exes to be is "Done".
preach girl!
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Old 12-14-2016, 04:22 PM
 
Location: Centre Wellington, ON
5,897 posts, read 6,100,195 times
Reputation: 3168
What if the relationship didn't end on a sour note but just because one or the other moved away?
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Old 12-14-2016, 04:29 PM
 
Location: Middle America
37,409 posts, read 53,569,981 times
Reputation: 53073
Nope. Ship has sailed.
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