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For months now, I have been hearing men and women on other forums and in articles stating that they would give it a shot however they would treat it as a new relationship. Could you guys and girls do this if you knew your partner has been with multiple people after the original break up? Or would you consider if they did not have sex with anyone after the separation? Also would being the dumpee or the dumper change your input on getting back with them?
My personal opinion is as long as she did not get with another man sexually I would give it a shot if things did not workout between me and someone else. I couldn't view it as a different relationship knowing she broke it with me, went after the grass is greener and messed with other dudes.... Then now she wants to come back? I know I wouldn't accept that.
I couldn't possibly treat it as "a new relationship." It's NOT a new relationship.
I thought I was going to try this just once. The man had found me again after 10 years. You'd think in all that time, with maturing, changing, life circumstances (by then we were both parents and both divorced) and so on, it really WOULD be a new relationship. Nope. The same intense attraction was there, both physically and mentally...but so were the old problems. It didn't even take until our first official date (until then we just talked on the phone numerous times, and emailed) for the issues to resurface. Not full-blown, but I could feel it coming. So I cut it off.
I wouldn't try it again with anyone. IMO, when you have broken up with someone, there is a reason, or reasons. Nostalgia makes you forget those reasons. Dating again brings them right back.
I couldn't possibly treat it as "a new relationship." It's NOT a new relationship.
I thought I was going to try this just once. The man had found me again after 10 years. You'd think in all that time, with maturing, changing, life circumstances (by then we were both parents and both divorced) and so on, it really WOULD be a new relationship. Nope. The same intense attraction was there, both physically and mentally...but so were the old problems. It didn't even take until our first official date (until then we just talked on the phone numerous times, and emailed) for the issues to resurface. Not full-blown, but I could feel it coming. So I cut it off.
I wouldn't try it again with anyone. IMO, when you have broken up with someone, there is a reason, or reasons. Nostalgia makes you forget those reasons. Dating again brings them right back.
I agree with you, well I don't think I would even give my ex a chance. As you said once you break up there is a reason and I wouldn't want to relive the negative moments with extra beef sacs pouring their grease over my taco.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut
Yeah, I'm not dumpster diving once I throw garbage away. Getting back with ex's is nonnegotiable for me. Friends, however, I will consider.
Well if you dumped them but what if you were dumped?
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