Celibacy Celebration (man, attracted, older, friends)

[cpg35223]

By celebrating celibacy, are you talking about throwing a party? Do you get a "Six months without nooky" pin?

[Heaveno]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

By celebrating celibacy, are you talking about throwing a party? Do you get a "Six months without nooky" pin?

I have a friend who is three years in and we do celebrate yearly by having dinner and drinks. We usually eat something that reminds us of what we are not doing, like lobster or sushi, something erotic to us that we do not eat often. Indian food gets me going as well.

Maybe I should get us some T-shirts made which say "I am part of the CELIBATE CLUB. Are you interested in joining?" What would be the callback number or phrase we should use? Any suggestions.

[Fat Freddy]

Originally Posted by Heaveno

I have a friend who is three years in and we do celebrate yearly by having dinner and drinks. We usually eat something that reminds us of what we are not doing, like lobster or sushi...

I think a couple of hot dogs in stale buns would be more appropriate.

[Tzaphkiel]

Originally Posted by DaBeez

Most people who are celibate not by choice are those who cannot find someone and/or no one wants to with them. This would include the old, the sick, the unattractive. I dont think these people would think of it as "celebrating celibacy" unless they are just trying to psych themselves up mentally to make them feel better about their plight.

I find this statement really offensive, because it implies that only the "pretty, the healthy, and the attractive" get to have sex because otherwise "no one wants them." That's a pretty skewed and condescending view. Sexual activity, unless it is at a really superficial level, which this post above implies that it is, is about faaaaaaar more than that.

[Tzaphkiel]

I like the "celebration" aspect because what I am celebrating is my dignity, my self-respect, my values, waiting for the right person who can meet the standards I now have for myself, and being celibate until then. It is about celebrating my freedom from past situations that were debasing, humiliating, oppressive, unhealthy, and abusive. That is why celibacy by choice feels so happy.

The corollary is also choosing to enter into sexual activity consciously, by choice, rather than "falling into it" or "being pressured into it" or "fear of being alone" or any of a number of reasons that for me are not about conscious choice at all, but ring more of desperation and fear.

[Lindsey_Mcfarren]

I celebrate my independence if thats what you mean. No one owns me, no one controls me and I am in control enough of my body that I don't run out and copulate with anything I can throw down.

[Heaveno]

Originally Posted by DimSumRaja

I like the "celebration" aspect because what I am celebrating is my dignity, my self-respect, my values, waiting for the right person who can meet the standards I now have for myself, and being celibate until then. It is about celebrating my freedom from past situations that were debasing, humiliating, oppressive, unhealthy, and abusive. That is why celibacy by choice feels so happy.

The corollary is also choosing to enter into sexual activity consciously, by choice, rather than "falling into it" or "being pressured into it" or "fear of being alone" or any of a number of reasons that for me are not about conscious choice at all, but ring more of desperation and fear.

Great post!! Most people would think that you would be unhappy in this way, but I have told people it truly is a victory! It is my choice and I am very comfortable with it. Yet, realizing that some people are not and that some people do not want to be celibate.

There may come a time where I do not want to be celibate and will desire a partner. But, realistically I may not meet anyone who I am compatible with. Seems to be an ongoing problem with women. The "VIEW" ladies were just discussing this problem that women are currently experiencing, and from all age groups. They also say that many women are stating that they are lonely. They attributed this to people no longer having community, and that the internet is now used for this purpose.

I know that I am happy with or without a partner for life. My happiness is not contingent upon another person.

[CuCullin]

Originally Posted by Heaveno

I know that I am happy with or without a partner for life. My happiness is not contingent upon another person.

Maybe this is the part I don't get. I've never truly been celibate, but I've also never thought my happiness was contingent upon another person. I can understand the idea behind the connection, but I don't "get" the connection.

[Lindsey_Mcfarren]

Originally Posted by CuCullin

Maybe this is the part I don't get. I've never truly been celibate, but I've also never thought my happiness was contingent upon another person. I can understand the idea behind the connection, but I don't "get" the connection.

I can't speak for everyone and don't imply that I know this is how you or anyone else is but SOME people out there are not happy unless they have someone. One relationship breaks up and they jump into another one back to back. Some people aren't happy unless they have someone.

I celebrate my celibacy and my independence. I am not working towards a goal of a happy life out there in the future, when I find my prince charming, I am happy now. I don't require a man in my life to make me feel fulfilled, emotionally or sexually.

I believe you have to be happy with yourself before you can be truly happy with someone else. Unfortunately alot of men are threatened by this kind of independence, they WANT a woman to be dependent on them. In the meantime, I have my kitties to keep me company.

[RoaminRed]

Originally Posted by Heaveno

I have a friend who is three years in and we do celebrate yearly by having dinner and drinks. We usually eat something that reminds us of what we are not doing, like lobster or sushi, something erotic to us that we do not eat often. Indian food gets me going as well.

Maybe I should get us some T-shirts made which say "I am part of the CELIBATE CLUB. Are you interested in joining?" What would be the callback number or phrase we should use? Any suggestions.

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