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I'm usually very good at reading body language but I haven't received many positive signs from attractive women ... but I'm wondering if a lot of that is because of my defeatist attitude. You see what you want to see
A lot of my problem is I've made dating out to be this impossibly hard thing in my mind. I've exaggerated women's standards to hell and made it seem like I had to be absolutely perfect to have one interested in me
You've really answered yourself there mate
I can't not begin to tell you how having a positive and optimistic outlook WILL increase your chances
If you are negative/defeatist then you'll tend to over analyse things and pick them to pieces which will more often that not be very apparent to the lady you're talking to therefore will only hamper you getting some where.
But with their status and fame they usually don't care.
That's the point mate .... with that in mind you can imagine how they approached and their shock and even disgust at when they said no. ( not as polite as that and rightly so )
Of course not all celebs as I've a few down to earth ones.
You might want to try a little perspective and humility. You might be working hard, but you sell cars to rich people, you're not aiding refugees or curing cancer or even working on an assembly line building the cars that you sell.
Oh no! This is the same absolutely wonderful guy that's been on here with the same story a dozen times already?
I can't not begin to tell you how having a positive and optimistic outlook WILL increase your chances
If you are negative/defeatist then you'll tend to over analyse things and pick them to pieces which will more often that not be very apparent to the lady you're talking to therefore will only hamper you getting some where.
I know man
I just have to convince myself of the basics - that women want to be approached and that an attractive one will like me
Question: Do you ever lose the salesman attitude? Because while it may make your customers comfortable in a sales environment, it may be offputting and insincere to women approached in a social situation. My father was a salesman and very good at it, and I've never been able to connect with people I know to be in sales because I'm always picking up on a thread of insincerity. I inherently don't trust them. Love my dad, but he's one of the most amoral people I've ever met. If you're bringing your sales attitude to the dating scene, it may come off as smarmy even to people who don't have the emotional baggage that I have.
I suspect that due to the insecurities that other posters have identified above, you are probably using that attitude as armor as you go into social situation, and it's tanking you before you even get started.
Question: Do you ever lose the salesman attitude? Because while it may make your customers comfortable in a sales environment, it may be offputting and insincere to women approached in a social situation. My father was a salesman and very good at it, and I've never been able to connect with people I know to be in sales because I'm always picking up on a thread of insincerity. I inherently don't trust them. Love my dad, but he's one of the most amoral people I've ever met. If you're bringing your sales attitude to the dating scene, it may come off as smarmy even to people who don't have the emotional baggage that I have.
I never had a salesman attitude to begin with. I try to talk to everybody the same way I talk to my best friends
I was seeing a woman over 40 last year for 8 months and she says I'm the nicest man she's ever been around. It's a shame the age difference/her not being able to have kids. She said she would totally marry me if we were close to same age/wanted same things in life
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