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Old 02-09-2017, 08:33 PM
 
Location: Central IL
20,726 posts, read 16,287,003 times
Reputation: 50370

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mavericksandy1 View Post
Sex makes me clingy desperate & a little crazy. Which is why I ask for std panels. I don't think someone would disclose their medical history/background if they weren't planning to stick around. Yeah I know he's not interested. Maybe he's even lying. No I'm not in love. I'm definitely in like. I'm definitely in lust. He's the first one I felt that way about in 5 years. I'm still looking. I picked up a few prospects in OKC. But 6'5". The tallest I been with; before him was about 6 foot. I don't even think I came up to his armpit. I'm not going to get on the merry go round of on/off again. Or expect things to change. I just want to reach out. I know he probably might not respond but I still want to do it.
Sure...reach out. But make sure he RECIPROCATES your favor from last time and that YOU don't do anything else for him until he (you both) get(s) the STD panel.

So basically, find out if his talk of being submissive is just a cover for him not contacting you or if it's the real deal when you're calling the shots to get reciprocated! I'm actually pretty serious...but you have to do whatever makes you feel right and doesn't get you more involved than you want to be at this point.
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Old 02-10-2017, 08:22 AM
 
888 posts, read 553,691 times
Reputation: 1984
Just let it be for goodness sakes. I will never get why people chase others who so obviously aren't interested. Why bother? Why be so desperate? Work on NOT being so desperate, get your own life. You won't attract anyone good this way. Sure he may see you again, just out of boredom or whatever, but that won't make him any more interested.


Also, how can this be a "heartbreak". You barely know this person. I have been less broken up ending relationships with people I have known for years. You seen to get way overly attached far too quickly.
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Old 02-10-2017, 04:09 PM
 
Location: SW MO
23,593 posts, read 37,398,089 times
Reputation: 29336
Too much drama.
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Old 02-10-2017, 04:12 PM
 
Location: Ralphs
454 posts, read 310,017 times
Reputation: 578
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mavericksandy1 View Post
So I met this guy through POF.
We went out didn't feel one way or the other about him until the end of the date. He's 6'5" and I went hug him goodbye & say thank you. He was surprised & oh so grateful for the hug. He was able to lift me off my feet with one arm. I'm not a small girl so even hotter.
He talked a lot about sex. I wasn't ready because my last experience was devastating & so was the one before last. Plus we just met. I also asked for an std panel. He agreed but never got it. So 4 months go by before we see each other again. I tried to break it off in the second month. He kept claiming work was getting in the way. So around thanksgiving, we were moving towards seeing each other again. But a week went by & I reached out. He said his grandfather died. So a week or so later we got together. We had plans. He didn't confirm the day before or the day of. He just texted, I said yes (we had loose plans) half hour later he was at my doorstep. I'm woman with hair & makeup so I wasn't ready. I invited him in. We decided to stay in we talked, played dominoes & watched tv. He went to third base first. It was one way my favor. Things were weird afterwards. Then we we made out & he left. I initiated all texts & calls through xmas. Then I threw in the towel. He says he's submissive. Likes being told what to do & desires a controlling woman. I'm not sure if I'm that person. So we went from him speaking to me every day to not hearing from xmas. It's a snow day where I'm at and all I want to do is reach out to him. Talk me out of it.
Feels like you talked yourself out of it if you read what you wrote. 4 months went by? He wants a woman you know you aren't. There are POF out there, so to speak. Go catch another one and throw this one back!
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Old 02-10-2017, 04:21 PM
 
28,896 posts, read 54,049,794 times
Reputation: 46669
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mavericksandy1 View Post
So I met this guy through POF.
We went out didn't feel one way or the other about him until the end of the date. He's 6'5" and I went hug him goodbye & say thank you. He was surprised & oh so grateful for the hug. He was able to lift me off my feet with one arm. I'm not a small girl so even hotter.
He talked a lot about sex. I wasn't ready because my last experience was devastating & so was the one before last. Plus we just met. I also asked for an std panel. He agreed but never got it. So 4 months go by before we see each other again. I tried to break it off in the second month. He kept claiming work was getting in the way. So around thanksgiving, we were moving towards seeing each other again. But a week went by & I reached out. He said his grandfather died. So a week or so later we got together. We had plans. He didn't confirm the day before or the day of. He just texted, I said yes (we had loose plans) half hour later he was at my doorstep. I'm woman with hair & makeup so I wasn't ready. I invited him in. We decided to stay in we talked, played dominoes & watched tv. He went to third base first. It was one way my favor. Things were weird afterwards. Then we we made out & he left. I initiated all texts & calls through xmas. Then I threw in the towel. He says he's submissive. Likes being told what to do & desires a controlling woman. I'm not sure if I'm that person. So we went from him speaking to me every day to not hearing from xmas. It's a snow day where I'm at and all I want to do is reach out to him. Talk me out of it.
You are making terrible choices. Let's break this down.

1. If a guy is really into being with you, then he doesn't make excuses. He finds time for you, either by calling or seeing you.
2. If you requested an STD test and he didn't give it to you, then he's being evasive.
3. If your last experience dating was so devastating, why are you dating now?
4. If the guy can't perform basic communication with you, then he has no consideration and takes you for granted, no matter what he says.
5. If you're the one doing all the calling, then he isn't that into you and you're being needy.
6. Life is way too damned short for all this drama. For God's sake, respect yourself.
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Old 02-10-2017, 04:24 PM
 
Location: Tricity, PL
61,430 posts, read 86,526,431 times
Reputation: 131279
Quote:
Originally Posted by canadiangirl_2015 View Post
Just let it be for goodness sakes. I will never get why people chase others who so obviously aren't interested. Why bother? Why be so desperate? Work on NOT being so desperate, get your own life. You won't attract anyone good this way. Sure he may see you again, just out of boredom or whatever, but that won't make him any more interested.


Also, how can this be a "heartbreak". You barely know this person. I have been less broken up ending relationships with people I have known for years. You seen to get way overly attached far too quickly.
1000% agree with this! ^^^

Some people have dependent personalities, other are insecure and have low self esteem. They can't function on their own, or think staying unhappy in a relationship beats being alone.
OP - don't be that person! Give things a chance without being scared to walk away when it's no longer working.
Staying in an unhappy relationship may keep you from being alone, but it will not keep you from wishing you had someone who didn't make you feel so unhappy and lonely.
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Old 02-10-2017, 04:34 PM
 
Location: Fairfax, VA
1,020 posts, read 1,008,708 times
Reputation: 1349
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mavericksandy1 View Post
So I met this guy through POF.
Stop there. That's your problem. POF is the toilet of dating sites.
(You really do get what you pay for.)
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