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Old 03-05-2008, 11:06 PM
 
Location: Sherman Oaks, CA
6,588 posts, read 17,544,859 times
Reputation: 9462

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I've been thinking about this for a while now. Way back when, people would just lose touch with each other, as they moved away due to new jobs, etc. There was no question of trying to contact someone you knew a long time ago, unless you wanted to call their parents and face some embarrassing questions!

Now there's Google. Something will trip a memory, and all of a sudden you find yourself Googling your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. Just "because"... Idle curiosity? Maybe. But once you find them, then what? Do you reach out in the name of friendship? What if you're married? Do you tell your spouse about this? What if that person is single?

I think the internet is a wonderful tool, if used wisely. It just seems, though, in cases like this that it's all too easy to get mixed up in something you shouldn't. Old emotions can be very powerful, even if they turn out to be false (are you trying to recapture a time in your life when you didn't have kids and responsibilities, etc.?).

So, what do you guys think?
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Old 03-05-2008, 11:55 PM
sun
 
Location: Central Connecticut
683 posts, read 2,124,602 times
Reputation: 450
Like everything in life, it has it's good and bad virtues.
It's good because it provides new opportunities and avenues for positive communication. But it's also bad because the simple written words of strangers are able to suddenly have a strategic importance in people's lives which can be harmful in some ways.
People can edit their words and seem much more perfect than they really are in real life, and conversely other people can be too easily dismissed because their identity is reduced to mere words on a screen without any connection to a real living person.
Just look at all of those people trapped in sting operations trying to hook up with minors on NBC's Dateline. How many of those folks would never have succeeded in linking up with a "real" minor or would have been foolish enough to have even attempted to seduce a minor if the staged opportunity didn't present itself?
Of course many of those perps would have anyway, but it's probably a certainty that at least a small percentage wouldn't have.
Well enough about criminal activity, but how many otherwise honest, sincere and relatively innocent people have been led astray by bad advice from seemingly reputable, trustworthy people over the internet?
Everyone has a personal bias of some sort, so is there really such a thing as objective advice?
Since the internet aids people to more greatly influence others, it becomes a weapon of a sort that's just like any other weapon, and must be used responsibly. Personal responsibility is just what it sounds like it is, everyone's own personal responsibility and in the end, it's no one else's. So caveat emptor...let the buyer beware, because there's always the potential for trouble in the air...of the er... internet!

Last edited by sun; 03-06-2008 at 12:14 AM..
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Old 03-05-2008, 11:59 PM
 
Location: southern california
61,288 posts, read 87,384,526 times
Reputation: 55562
best tool is our instincts which are only good face to face. internet invites deception.
people lie a great deal. internet is a clearing house for bad romance. whole lot of 2's lookin for a 10.
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Old 03-06-2008, 12:03 AM
 
6,304 posts, read 9,008,593 times
Reputation: 8149
I *do* believe that the internet is a terrific place to meet people that you wouldn't normally have the ability to meet. However, I am also a firm believer, in the case of romantic interests, to meet in person as soon as you can, and not continue with the "online fantasy" for longer than is necessary.
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Old 03-06-2008, 04:08 AM
RH1
 
Location: Lincoln, UK
1,160 posts, read 4,233,211 times
Reputation: 577
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bunky39 View Post
best tool is our instincts which are only good face to face. internet invites deception.
people lie a great deal. internet is a clearing house for bad romance. whole lot of 2's lookin for a 10.
I've got to take issue with you there mate - no doubt you're partly right but I think it's also good for impatient people. I got bored of getting nowhere meeting people in pubs - you only meet people at their worst and you don't get to find out much other than their appearance before you choose to talk to them. There are only so many times you can get talking to someone and realise how thick or boring they are, then try to back off... With the internet at least you can tell they're literate. And of course whether you have common interests (by the way, yes you CAN tell. A guy trying to convince you how much he knows about something by bluffing or Wikipedia is pretty transparent.)

I met my boyfriend while mucking about on an online dating thing - I don't think I seriously expected to meet anyone genuine and nice but I did - almost by accident.

On the OPs point about finding people from the past - I'm not sure now. You can develop a rose-tinted view of how people were, then you get back in touch and remember what a **** they were. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing - it kind of depends on how easy they are to get rid of!

I got back in touch with an ex and wished I hadn't, then he kept texting and ringing and I started regretting it big time.
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