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In a nutshell, because people are selfish. We are selfish by nature. Good traits like altruism, compassion, and generosity have to be learned. Not all of us learn it.
hopefully, my post helps someone out. for example, i had rotten front teeth as a kid and later corrected in my late teens. as consequence I got used to never smiling. in my relationships, I had been so willing to please others. now it feels good to know who you are physically. it's like finally realizing that you have a strong presence.
Funny how a teeth makeover changes EVERYTHING for you.
I didn't realize i was pretty until I was in my 30s. I've always had pretty low self esteem when it comes to my looks for some reason. Now I notice everyone remembers me, even if I've just been to a shop once, guys are always nice and attentive to me, always look up and in my direction when I get into a room or onto the subway, children like me ... How I realized is pretty dumb
I didn't realize i was pretty until I was in my 30s. I've always had pretty low self esteem when it comes to my looks for some reason. Now I notice everyone remembers me, even if I've just been to a shop once, guys are always nice and attentive to me, always look up and in my direction when I get into a room or onto the subway, children like me ... How I realized is pretty dumb
It's a weird post I know. I grew up in a home where vanity was highly shunned upon. I rarely even looked at mirrors. I was never into extreme fashion, or being noticed in anyway. Because of my upbringing I was largely an introvert and kept to myself.
Looking back I've noticed that my girlfriends were always pretty good looking. I never equated that to me being attractive. I assumed girls dated me because I was a "thinking, silent" type and very private.
Now that I'm dating someone that's very girly (wears make-up to go grocery shopping). Initially, I was always in awe of her beauty, and felt grateful that she'd date someone like me. We spend a lot of time together because we're both introverted homebody's.
My interactions with her caused me to realized that I had attractive features. It would be her subtle comments about how good my clothes looked, or how I smelled. She would mumble when I would leave some times things like "don't talk to anybody".. I started paying attention to my interactions with other women and I began to noticed raised heads when I enter a room; or awkward smiles from women when I'm out running errands or at a bar.
I slowly got more confidence after a few weeks of observances and it's really changed my life. I'm now starting to want to be outside and more social. It's almost like most of my adult life was in this fog of depression and self-doubt.
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